Confessions

[june11bride]

I also confess that when I'm in a store and the announcement comes on for security to scan a certain area, I get really nervous even though I've done nothing wrong!

[Jamaica2012]

I hear you about worrying about $$. I have a job and am worrying about money! So I can't imagine what's its like without a job.

I agree with your fiance.....everything will be okay. But I understand its hard to see that. Try to relax and know that everything happens for a reason.

Good Luck and best wishes!

 

Originally Posted by mexicobride422 

I absolutely love this thread..

 

My confession:

 

I have become so stressed out about money.. It's not even paying for the wedding that I am worried about but everything else.. Affording a place to live.. Buying furniture.. Pots and pans and a couch!

 

I've been unemployed for about a year and my fiance tries to assure me that everything will be okay.. But it's just so depressing sometimes.. I'm a Licensed School Guidance Counselor and the hiring freeze in the NYC Board of Education is ruining my life!

 

[Jamaica2012]

Yeah that's a hard one! Do you have any mutual friends that could just casually chat with her about it and find out the dish?

 Good Luck!

 

Originally Posted by atalanta 

I confess. I can't remember if I asked one of my girlfriends to be my bridesmaid. If I haven't already, I'd rather not. But, how do I find out? If I ask her whether I asked her or not, she'll either think she's being asked or realize that she was considered and then rejected.

 

[Jamaica2012]

Haha! LOL! I have the same issue but I think it something to do with the naughty stuff I did when I was a teenager!

 

Originally Posted by june11bride 

I also confess that when I'm in a store and the announcement comes on for security to scan a certain area, I get really nervous even though I've done nothing wrong!

 

[Jamaica2012]

Wow! Those are a lot of confessions. I had a similar situation w/ a friend of mine.  We are no longer friends now; more like enemies, but I am just fine with that because she was a downer! She hardly ever added to my enjoyment in life and was not a good friend.  If I could go back and end the friendship over again......I would have completely ignored her and just let it die out.  My fiance has told me several times that sometimes talking about things just make it worse and he was right.  I tried telling her that I needed time and that just made her mad at me. Anyways, to the point, I don't think there is anything wrong with not being friends with her anymore. Friends are supposed to add to your life, be nice to you, and not make you feel bad about what you do with your time.  You are at a completely different place than her and you are happy. She should be happy for you and appreciate the time that you two do have, when you have it.

 

About the cleaning situation: I'm kinda like that too. What I try to do and sometimes fail miserably at, is to clean as we go.  So if I'm headed upstairs I look around to see if there is anything that I can bring that belongs up there and not downstairs.  Also have you talked to your husband about how you feel about the house not being clean?  Maybe if he knows how stressed out it makes you he may make an extra effort to helpout or atleast clean up after himself....?

 

Good Luck! :-)

 

Originally Posted by june11bride 

I confess that I think that I am growing out of one of my friends. We have been friends for quite some time and have had some really fun times together, but I feel like our interests are becoming quite different. For example, for Canada day, she wanted us all to go to the big park to get drunk, where the whole town will be. I remember doing that when I was in high school. Plus, I'm a teacher now so I'd be fired if I did crap like that. These days Id rather stay home with my husband or have friends over for some drinks and conversation (which is what I ended up doing anyway, and which my friend left after 5 minutes and called us all lame). I am newly married, just started my career, and I just don't have interest in doing what she wants to do (and this started before I was married, it's not like I just suddenly became "lame" now that I'm married) lol. She hasn't done anything with her life and parties pretty much every day. I feel bad, but I really dont see our friendship lasting much longer. One night I was super tired from work and told her I couldn't make it out so she made some comment about me wearing "granny panties" and that I was lame. I also confess that I probably won't tell her, I'll just stop hanging out with her.

 

I also confess that I just got home from work and got really upset with my husband because he was sleeping on the couch (and once he's asleep there's no waking him up), and the one hour between me getting home and the time we had to go to bed was going to be pretty much the only hour we got to spend time together all week. After getting mad, I realized that the reason he is so exhausted is because he has been working SO incredibly much (double shifts, etc) because his employees suck. Then I started cleaning up and found a package of cold medication tea sitting on the counter and remembered that not only has he been overworked lately, but also has a cold. What a great wife I am, hey?? So now I feel awful about it but I REALLY want to hang out with him!! Darn our complete opposite shifts!!! I'll just have to wait until the next hour we get together and make it up to him (though I GUARANTEE he won't remember me bugging him when he wakes up tomorrow because he barely woke up when I was talking to him).

 

My last confession is that when I think about the future it stresses me out beyond belief that I dont think we will ever be in a place where I can come home from work and not clean. Even after cleaning for 5 hours the other day, I get home from work and the house is just TRASHED, and we both work a lot!! I don't have any idea how it gets like this so fast, and it stresses me out beyond belief. The worst part is, it's just the two of us-- what will happen when we have kids??? It feels so pointless to even clean because it just gets messed up before I have the chance to enjoy a clean house!!

 

[june11bride]

Haha thanks for the advice about the clean house-- I honestly believe he doesnt clean up after himself not because he's a jerk but it just doesn't register in his brain!! I've definitely talked to him before, but it just never crosses his brain that as his food is cooking he could quickly put the ingredients away...so I don't know if it will ever change!! It's just how he is, and I love him anway, I just worry about how we are going to keep up with us plus kids!!

[Jamaica2012]

Well I guess if that's how he's always been....its prolly how its always going to be unfortunately. That would drive me insane, but sounds like you are a much better woman than me :-) Oh I have an idea!! Have babies and then as soon as they can walk/move train them to clean.... lol!!! :-)
 

Originally Posted by june11bride 

Haha thanks for the advice about the clean house-- I honestly believe he doesnt clean up after himself not because he's a jerk but it just doesn't register in his brain!! I've definitely talked to him before, but it just never crosses his brain that as his food is cooking he could quickly put the ingredients away...so I don't know if it will ever change!! It's just how he is, and I love him anway, I just worry about how we are going to keep up with us plus kids!!

 

[Branya2012]

You could ask her what she is going to wear to the wedding. If she says something about a bridesmaid dress, then just say something about how you know that, silly, but ask her what she thinks about your colour and whether she is okay with wearing the same style as the other bridesmaids or does she think it'll look nice for each girl to pick their own style (of course, that will only work if you are laid back about the bridesmaid dresses...I personally think it's nice when a bridal party has the same colour/fabric dresses, all done in different styles...but even if you aren't easy going about it, you are the bride and always reserve the right to change your mind!). If she says she hasn't picked out an outfit yet, then you know you never asked her! There's only a slim chance she'll think you forgot...but that is the case, so would it be that bad??

 

Hopefully that helps, or you've figured it out on your own!! You could also get your fiancee to ask her...I'm assuming he's a dude, so he wouldn't necessarily remember if she was a bridesmaid or not.
 

Originally Posted by atalanta 

I confess. I can't remember if I asked one of my girlfriends to be my bridesmaid. If I haven't already, I'd rather not. But, how do I find out? If I ask her whether I asked her or not, she'll either think she's being asked or realize that she was considered and then rejected.

 

[Branya2012]

And for my own confession:

 

I do not want my future brother-in-law and his wife and kids to come to our wedding. This is no surprise to my fiancee because we both think his brother is a terrible person, but it's his brother so he wants him there. (The brother has put up a big fuss about money and now about never taking his kids to Mexico so I don't think they're going to make it anyways, but I still have my fingers crossed!)

 

And another confession, for good measure...I really want to tell all of the people who have been negative and selfish about our DW to go screw themselves, right to their faces!! It's our dream wedding and there's nothing anyone can do to change our minds!! (Especially now that the deposit has been paid.)

[kat2012]

Haha, I love your second confession!!! I feel like doing that myself so often.

My confession : My FI and i decided to abandon everyone, after talking to all our friends/family who were wishy washy about coming to our wedding and get married just two of us. So we planned to have our wedding around Xmas, so lots of people who are not that close to us would not be able to come. And who is close, we can explain what we want. Sneaky... but it makes our life so much easier

 

Originally Posted by Branya2012 

And for my own confession:

 

I do not want my future brother-in-law and his wife and kids to come to our wedding. This is no surprise to my fiancee because we both think his brother is a terrible person, but it's his brother so he wants him there. (The brother has put up a big fuss about money and now about never taking his kids to Mexico so I don't think they're going to make it anyways, but I still have my fingers crossed!)

 

And another confession, for good measure...I really want to tell all of the people who have been negative and selfish about our DW to go screw themselves, right to their faces!! It's our dream wedding and there's nothing anyone can do to change our minds!! (Especially now that the deposit has been paid.)