How Tacky is this???

[Sunshine311]

OK, I totally feel like I'm putting myself out here with a big L on my forehead for even writing this, but here it goes....

 

In just under two months we're off to Mexico to get married. Originally we were planning an at home wedding and I had my bridesmaids picked out, we had chosen their dresses and plans were well under way. Then, let's just say s**t happened and we decided to go away to get married. Although it was short notice, we felt lucky that 12 people were able to come along - none of which were my friends/bridesmaids.

 

Anyway, since plans changed my bridesmaids have pretty much forgotten about me and my wedding (I don't think they're mad??), and my best friend/former MOH has said she's way too busy with work to plan me a stagette before I go. She feels really bad, and wants to do something with me, but just can't do the planning. Although I do not expect a shower and gifts, I do really want a stagette! I'd love a night out with the girls before we go to Mexico just to have dinner and do some bar hoping!

 

So here I am in a situation where my best friend has said she'd love to attend and wants to go out, but has no time to organize it, I feel like a total dork asking someone to throw me a stagette, and I'd feel like a total loser organizing my own stagette!!! What am I supposed to do? Many friends have already asked when it is and I know they're pumped to go out, but how do I tell them no one's hosting/organizing it??

[amandalovesryan]

is that the same thing as a bachelorette party? anyway, i think that i would tell those that are asking that you don't know if there is going to be one and that you wish that there was. my friends would totally take me out if they knew that no one else had planned it. by the way, i think that is crappy of your friend. how hard is it to send an email to people and say this is when it is and this is where we will meet? just my opinion though!

i have a friend like that right now and i want to scream!

[Sunshine311]

Quote:

Originally Posted by albrosious by the way, i think that is crappy of your friend. how hard is it to send an email to people and say this is when it is and this is where we will meet? just my opinion though! i have a friend like that right now and i want to scream!

Truth be told, I agree with you. I'm pretty mad/hurt by her as well. She was all excited for everything until the home wedding was off, then it was like the wedding didn't matter anymore. Work genuinely does keep her busy most weekends, but that wouldn't keep me from doing something for my bf.

[stei0419]

I planned my own and just got input from my friends. I moved a couple years ago and wanted to do it w/ my old/closest friends, so I pretty much planned it for when I was going to be home. It was so much fun! I just planned dinner and which bars to go to and my friends ended up planning a few things for me w/out my knowledge, all turned out really well!

[TammyB]

I planned our bachlorette/batchlor party. We just told everyone that a big group of us were getting together for dinner, comedy club and then drinks. Neither DH or I are big party people, so we just wanted to go out together and have fun with our friends. it worked out great. So I say if you want it, plan it yourself.

[Maura]

do you have sisters or another friend you'd be comfortable telling that your bf backed out of planning your stagette?

[*JillD*]

could you just call all of your friends and just mention that you want to go to dinner and out for some drinks with all of them before you leave? That way its not like you're "planning your own party" but you can still get together with you friends before you leave. And who knows, once you mention it to a few people, someone may decide to take over planning, but you can really do it w/o overplanning and just say dinner and drinks and pick a place, that way it sounds casual and not you planning your own bachelorette.

[Sunshine311]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jilly76 could you just call all of your friends and just mention that you want to go to dinner and out for some drinks with all of them before you leave? That way its not like you're "planning your own party" but you can still get together with you friends before you leave. And who knows, once you mention it to a few people, someone may decide to take over planning, but you can really do it w/o overplanning and just say dinner and drinks and pick a place, that way it sounds casual and not you planning your own bachelorette.

I really like that idea! Thanks.

It was also good to hear that others have had no qualms about organizing their own get together! Suddenly it doesn't seem so bad! LOL!

[chicago88]

That's too bad that your friend can't take a few minutes out of her day to pick a Saturday & say let's meet at this place for dinner/drinks, etc...

 

I would just be honest with people that are asking & tell them you want to have something but you don't know if anyone is organizing anything. I'm sure someone will definitely step up and make a few plans! If not, plan your own -it'll still be a blast!!!

[Sunshine311]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mauraw do you have sisters or another friend you'd be comfortable telling that your bf backed out of planning your stagette?

Unfortunetly, no sisters. As far as other friends - I could mention it, but then I feel like I'm putting them on the spot to plan something...on the other hand, they may step right up to the plate!