Mangosong

Congratulations on both!

I was wondering the same thing, but we are still not sure where we are doing it. I'm not sure if you figured out the answer by now, but when I was looking into DR, it didn't seem like you could have a friend do it, even for a symbolic ceremony. Everything had to be in spanish, but could be translated. You could only have a legal ceremony on Saturdays, and Sundays were symbolic only - but still had to be in spanish.

I'm still on the fence about having them... but if we do, I won't be paying.

We haven't picked a date yet, but it probably will just be an avavilable date in the window we can do. I did not want to do November-December because it's too close to the holidays and people tend to spend a lot of money on gifts and travel and I don't want it to be a hardship for them to throw this in as well. His job does not allow employees to take off from September-October, so those are out. I feel that for my guests it might be too hot to attend a wedding in July-August. And April-May are more holidays and more travel. That pretty much January-March. Our anniversary is in march.

- I feel like it will eliminate a lot of the invite/guest list drama, ie: parents say we have to invite cousins x,y,z that we haven't seen in 15+ years. - And as part of above, I feel like the people who really want to be there, will make an effort and a commitment. - And also feel it will eliminate a lot of drama my friends went through (although I'm sure I will have my own). - We live in NYC and it is SUPER crazy expensive to have a wedding here, and I think it will be a little cheaper. - I'm am, but I'm not into a lot of the traditional stuff... like a wedding dress. I can't see myself spending over like $200... so this gives me an excuse to wear something a little more casual. - I LOVE traveling, but never been here before. - I wasn't super crazy excited about planning anything here, but got into it with a DW.

I have to remember to come back here when I do mine! These are written so beautifully!

@@acw271011 @@Tiffany1221 We are not sure if it's just going to be symbolic or legal yet - it basically depends on red tape? I think I would ask my sister. I would purchase the dress for my sister. My man is not close at all with his brother, so I don't think he would ask him to be an attendant. I guess it's just I have a lot of besties who just assumed they/want to be would be in my wedding... and got really hurt when I even brought up the idea of not having BMs. I just thought, with all the costs to usually be IN a wedding (about $1000), I didn't want to put that on them too, on top of having to come to the destination. When I thought about it, there were like 8 girls (including my sister) I would consider asking! And two girls who would like to be asked (but I would not). Unfortunately, I could pay for my sister's dress, but I don't think I could pay for 8 dresses.

@@Tiffany1221 Thanks! Yeah, I figured it out. But people keep talking about getting to the "good stuff!" Also, I couldn't do the verification thing on my phone, so that's why I couldn't start a new thread.

@@acw271011 I'm glad you mentioned kids! That is something else we may come across. I would prefer an adults only resort and a child free wedding. Especially since I know I will have friends/family who will try and bring the kids no matter what. So i was wondering if I was responsible for babysitting as well at a separate resort. @@carmor2 I don't think you are being crazy! I was kind of offended myself when my BFF even brought up staying elsewhere! For her wedding, the hotel was pricey, like $300/night and we had to stay for two nights (because I was in the wedding). There were other, less expensive place around I could have stayed at, but I didn't. So the fact that it would even cross her mind was upsetting. Not to mention, when we go on vacation together, we stay together because we are on vacation as a group! Anyway, sorry your family is being annoying! I agree with what you told your mother though, if they don't want to stay, then why come?

@@carmor2 that is exactly how i feel too!

Is anyone not doing a bridal party? Don't get me wrong, I have a group of besties, but I just feel like it's unfair to ask them to not only come to my DW, pay for their flights accommodations, etc AND also pay for their dresses, shoes, etc. I'm having a hard time because I mentioned this in passing and my friends kind of got upset that I would not have a bridal party. The man has mixed feelings about it as well, for similar reasons.

So while talking and planning (and deciding on a location) with a couple of my very good friends, one of my best friends mentioned that one of the islands I was looking at had great deals on different resorts and hotels and that it would be awesome because there would be so many options. I was kind of annoyed. First off, I kind of thought that defeated the purpose of a DW? And second, why would you purposely book a different resort when ALL of your friends are going to be staying at a specific one? I mentioned that all to her, and also that most resorts seem to charge you to visit if you aren't staying there - even for a wedding. Not to mention you would have to pay for a cab. So all the money would be end up paying to come to the wedding. Anyway, my etiquette question - my other BFF said that if the resort charges guests who stay off site to visit the resort I am responsible for paying for the guest the day of the wedding. I could understand this for a regular wedding, but I feel it's a little different for a DW.

Congrats on getting to 150! I'm working my way up!

I feel in will never be there!

Thank you ladies! After careful research (I'm a planner, and have 4 friends assisting) we eliminated each of the islands until we came to the list above. After doing some more research today, it looks like st. Marrten will be out as well. @@Moments That Matter after looking into it, Mexico is 100% out for a number of reasons. DR was my first pick until we found out the ceremony has to be in Spanish and he nixed it.

I would like to have a friend get ordained and marry us... but we'll see how easy it is outside the US.

I'm a very independant person, and I'm almost positive I will be changing my name. He doesn't care either way. My mom never changed her name, and it always felt like it wasn't complete, as a family. Also, having to explain ALL the time that no, she does not share the same last name as me, and no, they are married. We are starting a family, and I want us to be unified.

I've also heard of people shredding the invites (line by line) and then putting them in a christmas ornament. always thought that was cool. So you see each line...

My friend got married two weeks ago in Mexico and did the civil cermony in the US. Even though her husband is mexician (born, raised and a citizen), there seemed to be a lot of red tape involved, so they just found it easier to do it here and do the church wedding in mexico, in his family's church. Sorry if that wasn't helpful.

I have certain friends that are so attached to their phones. Even if we requested unplugged these friends would probably not be able to resist. They got super upset when we went to a concert and there was no service anywhere. Anyway, my point is, regardless of if you request no social media, there will always be one person who feels they can bend the rules a bit and no one will noticed. Personally, I would also prefer no, or limited, but I know it's not going to happen.

Most of my friends know that a DW is a go... and they still are asking about being BM. I just feel it's unfair to them to ask them to not only cough up the money for a DW but also for a BM dress. I mentioned that to them, and some of them got surprisingly hurt that I thought about not having BMs. So now I'm not sure.

Have you tried Target? They recently started a BM dress line and I believe the dresses are around $60.

I' was just in a wedding two months ago where we picked our own dresses. However, a couple of the girls, myself included (there were 9 of us), felt we needed... more stucture, more guidelines to pick a dress. The bride was basically like pick a dress you feel pretty in, in X color and X length. For some that seems sort of easy, but for myself it was more frustration and nerve racking. In the end, I ended finding dresses for 4 of the girls, myself included. It ended up looking super pretty. My dress was not from there, but if you are looking for inexpensive BM dress suggestions in similar colors, a couple of girls found them at target which now has a BM line.

Hi, I'm new! Thought I would introduce myself. I'm a little hesitate to be here, be planning without the ring (yet), but I was told to get on it (by the man, BFFs, etc.) so here I am! Anyway, we are set on a DW, so right now I'm currently trying to narrow down locations between (in order): - Aruba (came highly recommended from a good friend) - Barbados (His number one pick). - St. Lucia (also recommended from a friend) - Antigua (don't know anything about, and new to the list as of last night) - St. Maarten (also got added last night, and don't know anything) We're looking for an all inclusive (pretty much the most important thing to us), but not crazy expensive. He says the ceremony must be in english. Documents being translated are okay, but the ceremony has to be in english. Not sure if he wants a legal or just symbolic ceremony, I don't care. Also, a non religious ceremony, as I'm not christian. Anyway, thanks for reading, and any help I can get is more than welcome as I kind of don't know what I'm doing.

This might have been covered already, but do you need 150 posts to start threads?