beckys98

Funny - I was just showing my fiance my budget spreadsheet and the line item for tips made his eyes bulge! He just thinks the vendor prices are already really high, which they are. They aren't any cheaper than Chicago vendors for the most part! We can determine when we get there who has gone above-and-beyond and deserves a little more, but I told him we need to at least be prepared and have a plan! And I don't want to be dealing with it on our wedding night. That is the LAST thing I want to be thinking about.

@@ashhtayy - I've been a bridesmaid a handful of times, including MOH for my sister's destination wedding, and I've always paid for everything! I actually have not heard anecdotal evidence of bridesmaids NOT paying for their dress, hair, etc., though I imagine it happens. But a destination wedding is different - and if you can afford to help out with the costs I think that is really nice, but not necessary. While we aren't doing a "formal" bridal party, we are still doing some small things to recognize our would-be bridal party. I got the girls this simple bracelet with a turquoise band and gold starfish to wear at the resort that week (our resort logo is a starfish and we're using it on a lot of our stuff). My fiance is working on some t-shirts for both the guys and girls. I also asked the girls if any of them wanted to get their hair/makeup done - completely not necessary or expected - and most of them do! So I'll have breakfast with them on the wedding day and then we'll all be together in the spa just like a real bridal party. My sister (would be MOH) will be my witness, will hold my flowers, etc. etc. And we'll do pictures with them and have them sit in the first 2 rows at the ceremony - so basically we're just not asking them to wear a specific outfit and it makes it easier for everyone

Are you a Canadian or American bride? From what it seems pricing works MUCH differently. I'm an American bride getting married in Jamaica. We are in our 30s and the great majority of our friends and family take a nice vacation every year, so while we wanted to keep it affordable we also wanted to pick a place that we thought our guests might pick for themselves. We went with a mid-priced option, certainly not the cheapest and there were PLENTY of options that were MUCH more expensive. For land only, it is $1,000 per person for 5 nights - so $200 per person, per night. It didn't price anyone out of coming. Some people may, for example, stay 4 nights instead of 5 to save a bit but we haven't heard much fuss about it. Plus, assuming you're doing an all-inclusive, when you don't have to whip out you wallet every 5 seconds while you're there you realize that the cost is totally worth it! Good luck! The resort choice is the hard part and then the fun begins

I see it ALL THE TIME that people post pictures to Facebook DURING the ceremony and I cringe every time. You're stealing the couples thunder! I would like to at least SEE the first picture everyone else is going to see to make sure I like it We are going to ask our guests to please not post pictures from the wedding until after we get home. We will set our Facebook settings so that we have to approve any photo that we are tagged in before it can post to our profiles, which helps *some* of the photo spread. It doesn't stop them from posting it, just from tagging us in it. I wish I could ask people not to post any pictures from the entire trip until we get home either, but I know that is completely unreasonable. I just wish I could keep it private, special and intimate among our guests for a few days, but that isn't how the world works anymore

That is actually a good point about the backpack...I didn't think about it but we'll be lugging so much crap that having hands free could be a lifesaver! We have 5 other adults on our flight, but also 3 kids so I can't count on them to help much as extra hands! I'm writing this down

We actually had dinner with a bunch of friends last weekend and they are ALL SO EXCITED. I was actually jealous that they get to be excited because all I can think about is my to-do list. I mean, I'm not NOT excited, but I won't have that carefree excited feeling until I get on the plane...that is just how I roll. Although if I get some of my packing done early that will help. I hate packing and I'm already dreading it.

This is so cute! Is this shareable?? The itinerary, welcome letter, travel tips are next on my to-do list and I plan to work on it this weekend.

You should comment! I lurked for awhile before posting but you get even more out of the site once you start interacting with all the lovely brides. Everyone is super supportive, nice and helpful!

WOW! I LOVE this dress! Totally different than what I picked but I would have considered this one if I'd seen it You look stunning.

My fiance is unpredictable - some things he couldn't care less about and some things he is SUPER opinionated about and even though I've known him for 10 years I absolutely cannot predict which thing will fit in which category. So, that means I run everything by him for good measure. Which is also difficult because I'm the one who has done all the research to come up with the best option(s) so I have to explain everything to him about why I think it is best (usually based on recommendations by brides on this page)! It is difficult to get his attention on things though. I'm very type a and he is...Jamaican...which means he operates on his own timeline! We leave for Jamaica 2 months from yesterday and he feels like we have all the time in the world left! I feel like we have NO time left! So I'm constantly reminding him of everything we still have left to do and how fast these 2 months are going to go. He hasn't given any thought to what he is going to wear or what kind of ring he wants. He has a few very specific tasks - the music is ALL him and coordination with the DJ. He used to DJ so that is a perfect job for him. And, honestly, most of our guest list is his friend/family so he's been doing a lot of coordinating and follow up with them on booking, travel plans, etc. We are also planning an excursion or two while we are there and I'm letting him handle that too.

I have done boudoir photos for my fiance for a previous gift. He loved them but, honestly, the album sits in a closet! There is one framed photo in our bedroom. I feel like they are more for me so 20 years from now I can remember how young I was. Ha. I've also given him custom cufflinks. He is from Jamaica so I got him cufflinks with the coordinates of his hometown engraved on them. He loved them, but he also wears cufflinks. My current idea is to get him a custom made suit as a gift. Not to wear to the wedding, but for him to do when he gets back. A girl I work with's husband has a tailor who comes from Hong Kong 2x per year and sets up shop in a hotel room where guys can go and get measured and pick fabrics and everything. She says they are luxury suits for a more reasonable price. He wears suits to work almost every day and he is fashionable, so I think he would love the experience. That said, we've also talked about not doing gifts at all and spending the money on travel, including our honeymoon we'll plan for the fall. We haven't traveled as much as we would like and we think having those experiences together are important - especially while we are childfree. As I see the wedding expenses pile up sometimes I think this is a good option. Ha

I think it is beautiful and very flattering. Definitely yes on the belt - I feel like it draws your eye up a little bit and provides a nice balance to the full bottom. And of course gives you a great shape! Love the sweetheart neckline as well. When I started planning a destination wedding I was a little surprised that so many brides wear what would not be considered a typical "beach" dress - but I totally 100% think you should wear whatever you want! There are lots of brides on here with full dresses! Personally, I worry about getting hot but my wedding is also in June and I sweat like it is my job

I think you can post it on your website without full details. We had all of our guests RSVP on our website and we set up the Welcome Dinner as a separate event to RSVP to. I wanted to make sure we knew who would be arriving in time to attend for accurate numbers. People were really good about RSVPing to both events. Our resort won't confirm the actual restaurant where the dinner will be until like 2 weeks before our wedding, so I left it general but with timing. I just said we'll meet in the lobby bar at 6:00 and then we'll walk to the restaurant together. I do have to provide entree selections for our guests as well, which is stressful without knowing which restaurant it'll be at! I just asked them to select Chicken/Beef/Fish without specifics on preparation. We also have a Facebook group for our confirmed guests and we'll post it there before we go and then we'll also put an itinerary in their welcome bags!

I agree on the jewelry too! Some of it feels too fancy for the beach. I guess that is my problem in a nutshell - finding the right level of fanciness for pretty much everything. I want to be beachy and relaxed, but it is still my wedding! Our colors are turquoise and royal blue - the colors of the water! I'm going with silver, I think primarily because I found this cute comb for my hair. I'm not wearing a veil and we're using starfish on a lot of our stuff (the resort logo is a starfish) so I thought this was perfect for my hair. For earrings I got these with the blue stone, which I still worry is too fancy. But I think that is the only jewelry I'll wear. I don't think a necklace will look right, so that makes me feel better about the blingy earrings! I got them on Etsy and they should arrive this week. I'll probably skip a bracelet too, just because I don't feel like I need it! If I do a bracelet it'll be really simple. It is hard to picture it all when you don't have your dress either! I hope when I pull it all together that it looks like I envision, but it is so hard to tell

Haha! A lot of our guests have done all-inclusive but I got similar responses from those who haven't. It's like they just CAN'T believe it! I mean, it is pretty amazing, which is why we are having our wedding at one! I'm planning to do a travel tips brochure for our guests and include all the all-inclusive tips we've figured out along the way. I remember the first time my fiance and I went to one I scoured Trip Advisor for weeks and learned about Bubba Mugs, bringing $1s for tips, leaving a note (and tip) in the minibar fridge to get extra beer, etc. My fiance (then boyfriend) thought I was insane until we got there and he was so grateful for all of my preparation and knowledge! Haha. So, I plan to impart some of that onto our guests. We leave for Jamaica 2 months from today!

@@Meandhim Thanks! I'm small on top so they essentially are making me a dress with a small top and a medium bottom, so I'm hoping the only alterations I'll need are getting it hemmed and putting in a bustle. Our ceremony will be on the beach and then reception will be indoors. I KNOW that flats are the rational choice since I'll be barefoot for the ceremony (I got some barefoot sandals on Etsy) and then I will want flats later when I'm dancing. Plus no one will see them anyway, but it is hard to picture such a fancy dress with a flat that I would wear on a normal day. Plus my fiance is tall. I need to figure it out for my alterations appointment on 4/18 for the hem! I definitely prefer a sandal and would love something with a strap across the toes and the ankle, versus a t-strap or flip flop (like the Payless ones I showed you). But I also ordered these to try because I like the color. http://www.dillards.com/product/Gianni-Bini-Roycee-Jeweled-Sandals_301_-1_301_504890211?df=04375309_zi_mint_to_be&categoryId=456289&scrollTop=0 It is weird the things I've been indecisive about that I never thought I would be. This is one!

@@Meandhim - I didn't, I was too chicken! Though I still love the look of that first dress. I actually ended up getting a dress I originally saw on this site and had been dreaming about! It is about double what I originally wanted to spend, but it was exactly what I had envisioned. I will have it next week! This picture is me in the sample (sans makeup...ugh). It is backless, and also it isn't shiny like that - the flash did something weird. It is the Lanai Gown from Katie May. http://www.katiemay.com/products/lanai-gown

I love this idea and those are really cute! I might have to steal this one

I'm happy to do it! I figure it buys me a little good karma in my own wedding planning, right?? I'm struggling with my own shoe choice so I totally get how hard it is to find the right shoe. They are super cute, by the way!

@@Meandhim - I got 'em! Last pair anywhere in Chicago

So handsome!! The suit looks FANTASTIC!! You two will be absolutely stunning together on your day!

My fiance grew up in Jamaica, so that is an obvious reason! We are also fairly non-traditional and like that a DW gives you more freedom to break the rules. People have less expectations of what is normal, and are just so excited to be in a beautiful location having fun that the little details don't matter as much. We also live in Chicago where even a moderate wedding costs $60k-$70k. I will gladly spend a fraction of that to spend a WEEK with our guests instead of one day. We both also feel the most as peace when we're at the beach. So it was a complete no-braner to us!

Oh no @@kcole123! Poor guy! Definitely keeping my fingers crossed for you that it heals up soon! I've heard it is really painful

@@pddcmc I did try to get my fiance to elope - I don't think he took me seriously even though I was very emphatic! But even still he reminded me that this is the ONLY time in life that we'll EVER get our friends and family to go on vacation together. And since he is from Jamaica it is nice for people who care about us to spend a little time where he is from (even though, obviously, he didn't grow up anywhere near a resort. Ha!) So of course I agreed. Not to get all super serious on someone else's planning threat (sorry @@kcole123!) but we have also just had bad news (my mom died) after bad news (his grandma died - who raised him) after bad news (he has cancer and had surgery in November) since we got engaged and I think it makes it hard to feel that invested in some of the details. I KNOW it'll all be worth it, but I think we both feel like we just need a break! We need life to chill for a little bit so we can catch our breath

I'm glad I'm not the only one. We leave in 66 days and I feel horrible that I DON'T feel excited - obviously I know it'll be the best time and I'll be totally relaxed once we get on the plane, but there is so much to do before we go and I get resentful that every spare minute I have has to be spent on wedding stuff. And we are keeping it really simple! It doesn't help that my job is demanding so I don't really have a lot of said "free time." I'm trying REALLY hard to tell myself to enjoy this part because it'll be over fast, but no luck so far