beckys98

I still have a loooong way to go...My wedding will probably come first

This past Christmas I got my fiance cufflinks that had the latitude and longitude of his home town (in Jamaica) engraved on them. We impose a $25 limit on Christmas gifts for each other, so I got them pretty cheap on Etsy. He LOVED them, but they broke right away But cufflinks with the coordinates of your destination wedding would also make for a great wedding gift!

I'm sorry @@Mrsktobe, did you say it is SNOWING today?! Here I was complaining about the rain in Chicago. I bet that makes you even more excited for your upcoming trip!

Great question! I've been thinking about this lately. I would be fine not doing them, but I think if people want to say something I shouldn't tell them they can't. But I'm considering maybe doing speeches as part of a welcome dinner/rehearsal dinner the night before? My resort has our reception ending at 10p.m. and I'm just worried about taking up a lot of time with speeches - I want people dancing, interacting and having as much fun as possible. My sister did hers during dinner at her DW, but even though we told the servers not to stop service during the speeches they did anyway and it took forever to get through dinner.

Great question - my sister got married in Mexico last year at a medium sized resort. The wi-fi was spotty and I certainly didn't want to be carrying my phone around to the pool and beach anyway - I pretty much left it in the safe the whole trip. People generally congregated at the buffet for breakfast and then at the swim-up bar during the day. It ended up being fine. I'm definitely thinking of giving people a bracelet or some marker so people will know they are part of the same group when they run into each other. I do think it is a great idea to make a list of guests and their room numbers. We thought of this for my sister's wedding, but it proved sort of challenging with people arriving at all different times and days - and the resort didn't assign room numbers until you check in. So some people might have been there for 2-3 days when others were arriving so the list would be changing a lot. It sounds like the Canadians on here might have an easier time if you have everyone arriving on the same charter! That sounds so awesome, but not feasible for my guests coming from all over the US.

We did invite the female aunts and cousins on her fiancé's side. We knew they weren't able to come to the wedding (couldn't afford it) and my sister didn't do an AHR, so her shower was really the only wedding event for them. It did end up costing me a bit more than I originally planned, but it was worth it. We actually don't have much family on our side though, so it was nice to have his family there. The shower was about 50 people total. Let me find the mad lib files and send them over!

Do you think your ceremony will take a whole hour? I think they are usually done in like 20 minutes - so maybe your cocktail hour goes 4:30-5:30 and that gives you some buffer time for people to mosey over to the reception location!

I planned my sister's last year for her Mexico destination wedding! I had it at a Mexican restaurant with mimosas, margaritas, and brunch and it was great. She actually didn't want to open gifts at the shower because many of her future in-laws were not going to the wedding and she wanted to spend the time with them versus opening presents. So I asked people to bring their gifts unwrapped and we displayed them on a table - I thought some people would be freaked out by that, but it worked really well and made for a fun event! People had a lot of fun - and appreciated the margaritas quite a bit I also did wedding mad libs for a game. I had 2 different versions and people filled them out in pairs and then my sister read them out loud. I did one mad lib per 2 people just so it didn't take forever to read through them. They ended up being hilarious and everyone loved it. I can find the files and send to you if you are interested.

I've been a bridesmaid several times and always paid for my dress! Obviously it is really nice if you *can* help...especially if you pick a more expensive dress, but I wouldn't expect it. Also, I was the MOH for my sister's destination wedding last year and she did surprise me with a room upgrade! I definitely did not expect it but I did spend a TON of money for her shower and bachelorette party so it was a very nice gesture. My fiancé also put all the music together for their reception so it was a thank you to him as well. So, I think no rules or expectations!

I am also hoping to do a buffet with Jamaican food - mostly to fit a more informal reception feel, but also to avoid having to get people's selections! (I'm super lazy, obviously.) My sister got married in Mexico last year and she just had everyone have the same meal (Mexican chicken mole) because it was quite substantially cheaper than offering a beef or fish. It was delicious and everyone was happy. Plenty of other food on the resort if they want something else later!

Definitely pros and cons to the DJ/iPod. You won't have an event MC with an iPod unless you recruit one of your guests to do it, which is possible depending on how many "special" things you are doing like father/daughter dance, speeches, bouquet toss, cake cutting. If you are doing a lot of traditional things you might really want the MC to keep things moving. We are doing an iPod...BUT...my fiance DJs as a hobby so he can mix all our music ahead of time. I'm also a control freak so I want to be able to pick every song we play - we know our crew and what will make them dance and we don't want a ton of electric slide type songs We particularly like '90s hip hop. Haha! My sister got married in Mexico last year and did an iPod and it worked out just fine! I have seen on here that at some resorts the cost to rent the sound system for the iPod is only marginally less than having a full DJ - so you may or may not save that much money and will get the peace of mind at having someone keep the night moving. Good luck!

Hi @@SarahWallace - Congrats! I'm jealous your wedding is in February since I have to wait until June Also if you look on Jamaican photographers' websites many of them have portfolios from weddings at IRHS so you can get an even better inside look while researching photographers! Try Sungold, Stacey Clarke, Misha Earle, etc. I believe you can choose to use the live music for the ceremony or cocktail hour. The reception included is semi-private, though it sounds like most people say semi-private was still pretty private. You can pay extra for completely private, which I believe is $800. That was all in my paperwork from the resort when I signed the contract. Happy planning!

Definitely not tacky! I say go for it - it'll make the ride back to the resort more fun

I'll be keeping it minimal as well! I want to give our guests something to identify themselves as part of our group so they can find each other - and I'm thinking that'll be a room key/tip money holder. But I think that is it! My sister did hangover kits for her destination wedding, plus a koozie and a shot glass to wear around your neck. Honestly, no one used them because they forgot them in their rooms We'll spend the money on something special instead - probably keeping everyone filled up on jerk chicken and jamaican beef patties during the trip from our favorite local food stands!

Congratulations! I am not getting married in Mexico, but my fiance and I have stayed at RIU Palace Riviera Maya and really enjoyed it. It was beautiful with a great location near Playa Del Carmen for things to do - plus exchange privileges at the nearly RIU resorts. We would just walk up and down the beach and pop into the other RIUs for a drink! Food was great, beautiful beach, nice rooms - really no complaints. Dreams Tulum is going to be quite a bit further from the airport, which may or may not matter to you. I know if you have people just coming for a long weekend that can be a bit challenging on the travel time. Good luck with planning! Once you get the resort picked it is smooth sailing

I'll be changing my middle name to my current last name. I never much cared for my middle name anyway! BUT, my fiance and I work for the same company and, while we do totally different jobs and it is a huge company, we occasionally work with the same people. I think I'll keep my maiden name at work to keep my professional identity my own. I don't want to be "Damion's wife" at work...I want to be me! That said, if he had a hideous last name I would not even consider taking it His is simple, 2-syllables and phonetic. Fortunately he does not care either way. He thinks it is my name and I should do whatever I want.

@@calgarybride2015 - Those weddings were about 100 people, so not HUGE! It is just super expensive to do anything in Chicago. I think the venue rentals alone were like $15,000 in the "off season" and that didn't include any of the food/beverage/linens/service staff, etc. The cheapest wedding I have every heard of here was $40k. No way were we going to do that for ONE DAY. At least the money we spend on the DW is for an entire week and tons of quality time with our friends and family. Totally worth it And even for our out of town guests to get to Chicago and stay in hotels would be pretty near what they are paying to go to Jamaica. So I think it works out better for them, too

I would say you don't *need* to invite them. I know and adore my stepmom's mom, but I did not invite her. I mean, she is older and probably wouldn't attend anyway, but we have to draw the line somewhere!

Oh my friends who got married in Chicago spent upwards of $65,000 on their weddings! And that was mostly paid by the couple with minimal contribution from parents. That is totally nuts to me! I was the one who originally thought we could do everything for $10k (including our travel) and my fiance thinks more like $15k-$18k. I'm still hoping to stay under $15k!

We don't have kids but our siblings do and we're considering coordinating bringing an extra person on the trip to be the babysitter at times when the adults want to have a little freedom! Probably either a friend of my 19 year old niece or a babysitter from home they already know. Depending on how many people end up bringing kids, the parents might all chip in to pay for that 1 person's trip - we may contribute too if necessary. We really want them to relax and hang out! If we're all at the swim up bar one afternoon it sure would be nice for someone to take their kids for their naps or to play in the sand without feeling guilty. My sister got married in Mexico last year and our brother and sister-in-law missed the most fun part of the reception to put their 3 kids to bed

We'll do a welcome dinner/cocktails the night before the wedding, which will also probably be the same day a lot of people arrive (wedding is on Thursday), but it'll depend on how many people we have what it looks like. Is anyone doing speeches the night before? I kind of want to do them ahead of time so we can spend all our time dancing on the wedding night! I'm paranoid dinner is going to take too long and since the reception has to end by 10 we will be cut short.

Congratulations! We are having our wedding in Jamaica since that is where my fiance is from, but I will say we had trouble finding a family-friendly, all-inclusive resort in Jamaica that fit our needs. We made a few compromises and decided on Iberostar Rose Hall Suites in Montego bay. There are many, many adults only resorts in Jamaica that we had to rule out! We've stayed in Mexico 3 times (Riviera Maya) and had great experiences at RIU Palace Riviera Maya and Dreams Riviera Cancun. Punta Cana in the Dominican Republic also has gorgeous beaches - depending on where you are coming from it may be harder to get desirable flights to the DR compared to Mexico. A travel agent will definitely help - I just did a ton of research on my own so I was completely comfortable with our ultimate decision. Of course, you'll find lots of helpful people on here to answer all your burning questions! Happy planning!

I will be 34 and my fiance will be 35. Most of my friends got married around 30-31 but most of his friends (both male and female friends) are still single and they are 36. I live in Chicago and city peeps definitely get married later. I grew up in a rural small town and people there get married in their early 20s. To be fair, my fiance and I have been together since I was 25, but we just took our time getting to the marriage part!

I CAN'T DECIDE between Misha Earle and Stacey Clarke. Ugh...I'm driving myself crazy. At first I thought for sure Misha, but then when I went back to look at Stacey's again I thought her use of vivid color is very fitting for a tropical beach wedding. Misha's are a bit more romantic feeling, which is gorgeous, but Stacey is also cheaper. My fiancé thinks we don't need photography at all. While he has conceded to having it, he couldn't care less who I pick!

Ugh - I'm going to go to sleep fantasizing about your dress @@Sabes44 (is that weird...haha?) I was trying to save money in the dress category (under $1,000) but I may need to reconsider now!