I personally think the more people you invite the better and have told everyone to treat it like their own vacation as long as they participate on the wedding day. We sent out aprox 100 save the dates and invites, even to people we knew wouldnt come cuz guess what the people who can't come will buy you gifts if you have a registry or send you money! Vs the people who come to your wedding will probably not give you anything since they are already paying to attend! I allowed my family to bring friends if they wanted because after I hit 30 guests my fiancé and I only had to pay our taxes on our trip and the rest is all free we also qualified for the free wedding at the resort after 15 rooms book. As for your OOT bag my wedding is 40 days away and I have now finished ordering everything if anyone ( like my aunt who's been acting like she is coming) decides to come well sucks to he her for OOT and gifts the payment deadline was in September guests who book after that should hopefully understand they will not be getting all the same gifts as the other guests! Keep positive ladies !