Here is my take on this situation... I was in my best friends wedding and had to drive three hours away... I also paid for her entire bacheorette party weekend for around $1000, bridesmaid dress for a few hundred and then the cost of staying in her home town in a hotel for a weekend. All in all after gift etc... I think I probably spent about 2500 dollars. ** I work retail so lets not be thinking I am all full of money lol***She has now told me she won't be able to come to my wedding due to financial reasons. I told her more than a year ago that we would be going way and if that would be okay with her because I needed to make sure she would be there. She said absolutely and she would start saving. Push comes to shove she emails me a week ago telling me she won't be able to make it. In the last five years they have traveled to spain, mexico, italy, cuba and dominican. So it's not like they don't appreciate their vacations. That being said... as disappointing it is to know she won't be there, i am GLAD I spent the money that I did and was there for her. Even if I knew in advance that she wouldn't be coming to mine I wouldn't have dropped out of her wedding or changed anything I did. Try and see it from their perspective as well, hell yes be upset that theywon't be there, but I am sure they won't be excited to have to tell you that they won't be there for you. I hope your girl doesn't drop out of your wedding because you can't go to hers. If she is a good friend she should be understanding. If not. Screw em. Everyone needs to be a little more understanding of things that pop up, or personal feelings.