JessiTaylor

I would have two main colours and then maybe see if you can use the other two as accent colours! bouquets can be mxied so can include all of them - eg green foliage can go in the bouquet with mixed flowers to be honest im pretty terrible with colours (havent picked my own yet) so i have absolutely no idea if they match or not - but you can look for colour wheels online which tell you how to put various colours together =)

Im sorry i wasnt sure where to put this - i guess its related to the etiquette of hiring a friend to do a job as a professional, what you can expect and how to treat them (nicely of course, but more as a friend...or a professional) My fiance has a close friend who used to be an avid amateur photographer and hes recently become a professional (maybe a year/year and half ago). He does have some experience shooting weddings and we've seen his pictures and they are nice but i have some concerns - would it be better to go for somebody with more experience - if he does the wedding then he cant enjoy the wedding as our guest - no alcohol, pretty much no dancing as he'll be working, no socialising at the event (well, i mean obviously he can talk to people but will have to be available for pictures) - im just not sure its a good idea to mix friendship with business, particularly with something as important as a wedding - if something goes wrong its more awkward to handle than with a stranger and i dont know if i would feel able to treat him as a professional rather than a friend (telling him what i want, complaining if he does something wrong etc etc) my parents paid for an engagement photographer and the photos turned out pretty bad which is why my fiance is concerned about hiring a photographer we dont know personally. we would of course pay him, but he gives a friends discount and is definitely less expensive than cancun photographers so how do i decide?!

for some reason im having major problems accessing the riu hotels website today (first time i tried)...anyone else having this problem? i catn work out if the site is down or if there is a problem with my computer!

im now trying to choose a photographer!! i kind of wish they had prices on the websites of standard packages rather than having to contact each individually! they are all pretty pricey though =S

yeah i think its a good way to handle it! on a side note...when i get stressed about wedding stuff, i dont know why but etiquettehell.com really soothes me. its got all these stories about bridezillas, bridesmaidzillas, guestzillas, wedding disasters... for some reason hearing disaster stories makes me feel better haha, and any tension with friends...trust me, it could be way way worse!

that was what i really wanted to do! the big dress reveal at the church, he sees me for the first time and it was supposed to be beautiful and romantic! until xcaret told me that we had to come for photos together an hour before the wedding (as its a sunset wedding) otherwise they would all be in the dark (and since ill need a photographer at wedding anyway i dont really want to pay to have photos on a different day). so i guess my 'big reveal' will be in a hotel lobby/corridor!

oh dear. so she has become a self nominated member of the etiquette police. How you react depends on whether you think she is genuinely trying to help... or shes unhappy about something (jealousy, doesnt like your fiance, wants attention on her or whatever) and its spilling over into snarky comments. if she might have good intentions dont call her on it. its pretty standard to go with only your mother and family members to look for dresses, it shouldnt upset her that much! give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she just wants to be involved - maybe assign her something else to do/think about so she stops bothering you haha upset people are pretty standard when you announce you will have a destination wedding - its not convenient, its expensive, the country you picked is dangerous and everyone will die etc etc etc. you just need to learn to say "hey i know its difficult to get to, obviously i would love to have you there on my special day but if you cant come ill completely understand. you can always check out the photos later" with a smile,if they continue you get firmer by degrees potentially ending up at level 10 - snappy - which goes something like this -"hey look at my hands, do you see a gun? no? thats because i dont have one pointed at your head and im not forcing you to come. its an invitation - your right to decline or come as you want! but if you come then button it because your miserable comments are annoying me" (ideally there should be several levels between sweet and snappy. but frankly it depends how stressed you are when this conversation starts )

hey cindy,im getting married in almost exactly a years time - march 9th 2013 at xcaret eco park! im very excited =) only problem is we are responsible for finding our own judge and priest...which is making me wonder if i need an extra wedding co-ordinator outside the venue. xcaret dont even tell you how to go about finding them - but whatever, i can solve most problems using google! i think cherbear is right, the resort WC should be able to help - you will probably pay for the normal catholic ceremony, and then additional costs to get the judge brought in. it also depends whether you want all your guests watching the legal bit(so maybe need chairs, another location etc) or if you just want the 2 (?) witnesses there while rest of guests have a cocktail hour or something

mmm i think people who mention getting an invitation might well be serious. they see it as just taking a holiday with friends i think, rather than a wedding! as for rings - i know some woman pick out the engagement ring themselves, but quite often its chosen by the man - so how on earth do people expect you to know the cost of it?! i mean even if it wasnt horribly rude for them to be asking - do they imagine he proposed and you were like "yes!!" followed by "how much did the ring cost? show me the receipt". i have zero idea how much mine cost, couldnt even give a ballpark estimate. bottom line though, i love it and it doesnt matter to me! people are just weird!

actually that would work...i was even debating staying there and asking if i could pay a fee to have them handle a few details like flowers even if the wedding wasnt there Or...being seriously cheeky...if its one of the resorts where a certain number of rooms get a wedding package...do you think i could have the package without the wedding hahaha im assuming not! i bet theyve never been asked it before =) "i already have my wedding pretty much sorted, so i want the free wedding package minus the ceremony but yes to flowers and the cake please"

i think freeze dried flowers are fine! just to say,however, if they search you and find a "banned" item that you didnt declare youre not necessarily just looking at confiscation of said item...youre looking at possible penalties and a lengthy lengthy discussion. rules are enforced according to how officials feel on the day, but can involve a fine etc. And this is a massive generalisation. but Americans/English people are often assumed to be rich and so are more likely to get hit with penalties than a mexican

You can bring freeze dried or fake petals into mexico...but not fresh ones (im not sure they would survive the journey anyway) - any kind of plant or flower is prohibited

ive been using it since yesterday and so far im really loving it! just pinning pics of flowers/dresses/cakes and having everything in one place - so convenient! thing is i cant decide on colours so im starting to pin things from every colour scheme im thinking off..this cuold get out of hand!!

oh my goodness. i have looked at a million pages about flowers and im none the wiser what i want to have! im trying to decide bridesmaids dresses and flowers at the same time as i havent made final decisions about colours. i lvoe the colour blue...but there arent many natural blue flowers (and im not convinced i want dyed flowers). i saw a stunning bouquet in one of the first pages of this thread - yellow roses and irises - which i loved or ill go in a completely different direction!! i have no idea! its like there are too many choices!

it sounds like a stressful situation for both of you maridr and beabride. particularly if extra people could potentially mean you would have to change your location!! i know how it is when people assume that as the bride the idea of a DW was entirely my idea...but my fiance was the one who mentioned a beach wedding and i just went with it! im hoping fiance will make it clear to family, as they are pretty disappointed that we arent having a local extravaganza with friends, family and the local goverment (fiances father president of his mexican town) in his hometown. FMIL kept muttering that our wedding was my decision (and fiances) and shed have to support it... but she was going to be *incredibly* involved when it was time for her daughters wedding (lucky future sister in law hahaha) My mum wants to invite her cousins (who im pretty sure ive never met, if i did it was over a decade ago and they werent very memorable. but my parents are paying for most of the wedding so i have to respect their wishes on that. though to be fair shes pretty sure they wouldnt be able to come the problem is more my fiance...ive explained the maximum size cant be more than 100 people - cost reasons and the simple fact i dont want a mega wedding filled with loads of random people. And so far the planned guest list is way bigger and there are people on it who arent super close friends, just people he quite likes! we'll have to come back to that topic very soon! i wuoldnt mind if friends invited people to the resort to spend time with them...providing they understand extra people cant come to the wedding itself

oh this made me laugh =) ive had a few questions like "when are you having babies? how many do you want?" but what was *much* more annoying to me, is before we got engaged fiances friends would wait until we're in a big gathering and someone (always at least one person!!) would ask "so are you guys going to get engaged/married then?", with everybody staring to see the answer. It was like "well i cant answer that as he hasnt asked me, but thanks for putting me on the spot in front of a large group of people". i dont know what they expected...theyd ask if we were going to get engaged and right then he would drop to his knees and propose? or what? grrrrrr. and now the baby questions are starting!! i have no patience with it people guess from my venue that the wedding is expensive (xcaret eco park) i get questions such as "wow, how much is that costing you then?!" and even worse "who's paying for the wedding?". i just rpely that we dont have any final figures yet (even though we have a very good idea how much it will be1) Mexican friends also reference random famous people who got married there. i have no idea who paulina rubio is and no,strangely enough as an english woman, a foreign pop star (i think) getting married there did not affect my decision to choose it as my venue hahaha I must admit though, i very discretely asked a few people i know who got married in mexico where we live and had lovely weddings what kind of budget i would need to use their venue if i did it locally rather than at the beach. Given that it wasnt sheer nosiness they didnt have a problem steering me in the right direction. only very close friends though, i couldnt ask someone i didnt know well. Rather than asking if they were invited, i did have one friend who i lost contact with for a few years (and recently reconnected with) assure me that she would do her best to be there. I didnt point out i hadnt actually invited her hahahaha. And another old friend who i havent seen since high school (so a good 8-10 years) tell me how much she would like to come with her husband ah its all pretty funny really. im not sweating the small stuff =)

im planning on having both (though not at gran caribe). the catholic ceremony will be 45 minutes and im hoping they can find an english speaking priest! then everyone will go to the reception venue and ill just be in the corner with fiance, 2 witnesses and a judge. the legal ceremony is supposed to be super short so dont have to worry about guests getting bored during 2 ceremonies. there are some its strange how nearly every single resort offers packages for either catholic/symbolic OR legal but ive never seen an all inclusive package that is for both! what fiance and i are doing (as suggested by our venue eco park) is taking wedding photos before the ceremony, and then just 15 mins of photos with family and friends afterwards. The reason we're doing this, is otherwise guests will be having a cocktail hour while we took photos...and then theyd have to watch legal ceremony and wait longer for dinner. does mean we'll miss out on the "big reveal" as i walk down the aisle though! the only issue with legal ceremonies is the fact you need to get blood tests 3 full business days before wedding (sometimes chest xray), to be honest i think this is the main reason why people arent sure about doing the legal part in mexico and seems less hassle to do it at home. you will also have to pay for a priest and a judge to come down as the two ceremonies are entirely seperate and not related to each other i really want to do both same day though...theyre equally important to me. also i live in mexico anyway (monterrey) so i dont have a choice but to do it

i was stressed about this, but luckily my venue gave me a timeline so i know roughly whats going on we are having first dances after the dinner. this is because our band is kind of expensive...and we just want chilled relaxed music during dinner maybe a harp or something classical... so it makes sense to start live music after dinner and save a bit of money! we arent going to have official speeches, maybe just toasts...but i like the other posters idea of doing it between courses 16:30-17.30 bridal couple photo session 17.30-18:00 brides makeup retouched. reception of guests at main entrance 18:00-18:45 catholic ceremony 18:45-19:00 hrs Photos outside chapel with family and friends 19:00-19:15 hrs.walk to reception venue 19:15-19:30 hrs Reception of guests in the island restaurant with welcome drink and musical performance 19:30 -19:35 hrs.Entrance of bride and groom via special ramp, with chosen song from CD 19:35-20:20hrs. Dinner starts accompanied by harp 20:20 -20:25 hrs. first dance of couple, live band starts 20:25 -20:30 hrs. father daughter, mother son dance i guess ill cut the cake a bit later in the evening, maybe 10pm to leave a bit of time after dinner so people might actually want it. people often have speeches before dinner...but im thinking no formal speeches, and like the other poster maybe a brief toast between courses

actually if it was me id tell the fiance he had one of two choices - make the decision to postpone, or if wedding was going ahead as planned he had to fully get on board , as going through with the wedding preparation and build up with a really negative attitude doesnt do anyone any good. the fact that he seems angry and bitter isnt a good sign though so i can understand why postponing it seems like it could be a better option - especially before you pay out more money on these arrangements. i agree that if you have a lot of doubts for a long time, then postponing is a good idea BUT if fiance stopped acting like this would you still be having these doubts? dont tip toe around him feeling bad and not knowing if your wedding is happening...tell him you dont like hows hes acting and you both need to find a solution to it and give him the two options i mentioned maybe this is an odd way of thinking...but i think in that situation id also ask if there was something he hadnt told me...secret debt or a reason why hes so stressed out. Im assuming the original poster has a fairly good understanding of fiances finances and therefore wouldnt have booked the wedding if it was going to totally bankrupt them. so why is he so incredibly stressed about it? is it another problem stressing him out and so hes lashing out using the wedding as a convenient target. horrible situation though, im so sorry!! i hope it works out for you sunflower!

whenever i read older threads like this...im always wildly curious how it turned out for the original poster and what they decided. and often they dont come back...so its like reading a book with the ending missing hahaha did the original poster cut her guest list? did the family pay for their meals? how did it end?! but to add my 5 cents...nobody should have to pay for a wedding reception (i dont even like the idea of cash bars for drinks) especially if theyve travelled across the world to be with you at your wedding! as for inviting certain relatives you dont really see... i was asked if i was going to invite my uncle stephen. my reply was "would this be the uncle stephen i havent heard from or seen since i was 10? er no" i mean given that he couldnt make the trip across england to visit us in london (apparently there is an annual phone call to my dad - his broher) he sure as hell isnt going to come all the way to mexico for my wedding. and i dont see the point of sending an invite to be polite when i know it would be rejected! i mean the idea of him coming is about as likely as him riding his tame flying pigs across the ocean, but even if we did invite him and he came, how would the conversation go? "so, how have you been for the last 16 years or so? any news?" meh.

thanks for all your comments! i think im leaning towards doing it myself =) in terms of time...i definitely have a lot of it (i cant work here in mexico until i sort out visa issues..which is a long slow process!) i guess its a paranoia that ill screw something up, but then i figure that a wedding co-ordinator doesnt guarantee happiness and a smooth ride (take the jennifer smith thread for example). its great that there are so many vendor reviews on here so i dont feel like im picking blindly photos, cake, flowers and transport i can definitely do. fiance can take care of finding a judge as im pretty sure that would be tricky to do given my lack of fluent spanish. at least i finally sorted the venue and date,previously i felt like i was taking 3 steps forward 4 steps backwards and never getting anything done haha

im going for a a 2013 wedding (march-may we are finding it hard to fix a date) and i initially thought i was planning too early...until i contacted a few places and they already have some reservations for next year!! its not like full of reservations yet of course, but there are other people booking super early so you have a definite advantage over people doing it with less time! also by choosing and booking now...you dont have the stress of an entire year to worry about it!!

oh my goodness that just describes me exactly!! im glad im not the only one worried about it, im super-sentimental and get teary eyed at everything sweet. so im pretty much sure ill sob on my wedding day, just overwhelmed by the emotion! and whilst some women cry in the delicate beautiful way...i get red eyes, red snotty nose, blotchy face..and theres no way people will be thinking "oh how sweet shes touched by the ceremony"....more likely "oh dear, she doesnt look so good" and "that woman seriously needs a tissue, her nose is dripping" hahahaha im thinking giving my family a bag to carry, with emergency crying kit - tissues, eye drops, maybe those eye make up remover pads if mascara/makeup goes down my face, then things like concealer to touch up any bits that have gone wrong

For eyeballs - yes a symbolic ceremony avoids the need for blood tests and paperwork. but for me personally, i would feel a bit weird about asking people to travel so far if it isnt a real wedding. i know people here see do see it as their real wedding (and im genuinely not trying to offend anyone), but somehow that piece of paper means a lot to me! for me its the opposite scenario to most - my fiance wants the catholic ceremony and is not sure if we'll have time for the judge (to make it legal) at our preferred venue (hes mexican and so the catholic aspect is the most important to them). We live in monterey mexico, so he suggested we do the legal bit here afterwards alone after travelling to cancun for the catholic bit and ceremony. Whereas i dont want to have this big elaborate wedding and reception and end the day single. So my choice would be the legal ceremony over the catholic one if i had to choose. and then do the catholic one with no guests. im sure it must be possible to have a non-catholic symbolic AND legal ceremony for you guys though. you could find out if its possible to get a script of both kinds of ceremonies and see the difference? I think the translator wouldnt make it too awkward - i can understand spanish but i would prefer to say any vows in english, and i would like my fiance to say them in his own language

i have to be honest - i have no idea what dress shorts are?! i dont think we have that term in england? we're going for xcaret eco park now, so we're expecting people to be a little bit more formal than if the wedding were on the beach but im thinking my dress code will probably be light/linen trousers and a shirt. no tie necessary. but fiance says that most of his friends wont have light coloured trousers so they may well just come in dark suits anyway. and since all of my guests are pretty much from monterrey...where weddings are uberformal massive events. so i dont think i have to worry about people turning up in shorts. although ill put it just in case! women...knee length dresses. full length if they want and have one (its pretty standard to own super formal ones ehre) shoes i dont mind, flip flops are fine if thats what they want! smart-casual is fine...super casual isnt!