First off, I want to say I am so sorry and I know how you feel because I can totally relate. My Dad ended up marrying my mom's best friend when I was 11 (it's his 3rd wife) and they are still together. A Little Background: I never liked the woman even when she was friends with my mom! My Dad's wife (as I like to call her, step mom is too nice) made my life so miserable in HS, College and she still manages to do it today! My dad let's her talk about how awful all of his kids are, etc, etc... When my mom passed away 1 1/2 ago my brother and I held a reception for her, and she went around introducing herself to people as my mother!!! She is totally crazy!!!.... I know she is going to give my dad a hard time about offering money for our wedding so I am not expecting it. However, he paid for 'her' oldest daughters' wedding and to boot didn't contribute or come to my older sister's wedding! I don't want 'her' there, she is already making her snide remarks and I just really can't stand her and I finally told my Dad that I didn't like her and if she berates me anymore, I will have a chat with her! Unfortunately for me, I have to invite her if I want my dad there, as he never takes my side! I guess my best advice is to try talking to your Dad and tell him very calmly how you feel! You may be so surprised by his reaction. But truth is, you may be "stuck" with this woman being apart of you dad's life. But that in no way means you have to be nice to her or even that nice to him right now. You definitely need time!!! I know for me, it's hard to deal with to this day, but I have to, if I want any sort of relationship with my dad. I know nothing can really help, but I am here if you ever need to vent about it again! I totally get it!!!