That really sux! I had 2 BMs that were my best friend growing up tell me a couple of months before the wedding that they wouldnt be able to make to the wedding either... one sent me a txt message, the other an email... both of which r just tacky! I gave them 18 months to plan and save and even bought their BM dresses for them. Both of them came up with bad excuses as to why they couldnt, even make it to my shower, acting like it was just a random get together, not my wedding shower! One of them ended up paying me back for the BM dress, the other has basically avoided me and wont return phone calls so I have stopped trying to be friends. It is absolutely appalling to me how some "friends" act about your wedding. I wouldnt be upset with friends that told me up front that they couldnt be able to make it as I would completely understand, but the friends that string you along, get your hopes up, then RSVP "no" and never call you again are just bad people. Another thing that gripes my cookies is when guests say they cant afford the trip when A) they havent even looked into prices and they then go on large, extravagent trips and post all their pics on Facebook! I had one friend tell me she couldnt make it because of money, which I understood, especially as she is getting married in November, but then I see that she has gone to CA a couple of times within the past year, on a ski trip, a trip to Europe, and is actually currently in London for 3 weeks for the Olympics... its not that some guests cant afford it, its just that your wedding is clearly not a priority for them. It was definitely tough to see some friends which I thought were closer, were not as close as I thought. I had several family members that had to scrape together money by having yard sales and cutting back on spending because they wouldnt have missed it for the world. Prior to my 2 BMs acting like they did, I would have scrounged up the money because I couldnt imagine not being there at their special day. To be honest, we were surrounded by so much love, friends, and family on our big day, I dont think I even thought about the 2 BMs that couldnt be there. I didnt think that I should have a B list of BMs as they would clearly know they were not originally close enough to be considered BMs so much to my OCD's dismay, we had uneven numbers of GMs and BMs. I am the type of person that is much happier have a few really close friends than having tons of friends that will blow you off is something better comes up.