Branya2012

Just be honest about the reasons you are having DW in the first place! You started off your post by saying that you want a small wedding...so tell anyone that asks that very same thing! It is yours and your future spouse's special day so you should do what you want and not feel guilty about it. In my experience, even if you were to cave in and invite everyone that you feel you are "supposed" to invite, you are not going to please everyone. Keep in mind that it's yours and your future spouse's wedding! No one elses! On that note, if you want to invite some close extended family members and not others, then do it! One of my good friends that got married a few years ago said to me that when she was thinking of who to invite to their wedding, they thought of the people that are going to be there to support them in their life as a married couple and the people that were there for them currently. If that includes some family and not others, then that's just the way it is! You shouldn't feel guilty for planning the wedding of your dreams!! Even though sometimes that is easier said than done! As for an AHR, if you don't want to have one, then don't! Don't feel obligated to do anything you don't want to do, especially since the cost could easily get carried away if you are throwing an AHR as well. Personally, we chose not to have one. I kind of felt that people might want to attend the AHR over the wedding, and it's sort of a one shot deal for us. If we were going to get married at home, then that's where we would have our reception. Good luck in your choices! Hopefully at the end of the day you can make your decisions based on what you two want as a couple! It's hard, believe me! But at the end of the day you will have the beautiful wedding of your dreams! Quote: Originally Posted by lauren478 I want a small wedding and right now I have 25 immediate family members and super close friends (who are the wedding party) coming. I have gone back and forth about inviting extended family because I am not that close to mine, and there are about 60 of them, and FI is not close to any of his, and none would come. I don't really want to invite them, except about 5 of them, but I realize I cannot invite some and not others. I want to celebrate our marriage with them, but not in a big huge way and not for gifts, but we don't have money saved for that, as of now. We would have to throw 3 parties for my moms family, dads family (they are divorced), and fiances family/friends that live in town, and come to them, otherwise it makes no sense to throw AHR if none can travel to it for a day. Just seems like a waste of money, and time, which I do not have (I don't get weekends off as a managers in a restaurant, especially 3 after taking time off for a wedding). Do we have to throw an AHR? Will my extended family/friends that aren't invited be mad? What do I tell people, like my friends parents, that they aren't invited to my wedding?

Thanks for the quick reply!! Glad to hear your guests loved the bags...I am hoping to keep it a bit of a surprise for our guests as well. Did you have a lot less luggage on the way back? I have heard of photo share sites...have you had many people respond with pictures? Great idea! Thanks! I honestly haven't been giving planning a second thought, but I know there's a lot to think about (love the petals and the candles on your tables, btw, and the colours!!). Right now we're working on invitations and then I might start dress shopping. I'm kind of liking being chill about everything. Hopefully it doesn't come back to bite me later this year!!

Your kits are amazing!! And your welcome book looks really great! Those Tide sink packs seem like a fabulous idea!! Definitely going to pinch some of those ideas for our OOT bads. Thanks a lot!! A few questions: did you get any feedback from guests, now that your wedding has taken place? Did they really like them, use them?? Also, what exactly was the photo share thing that you included in your book? Did you find that stuff difficult to pack? Did you assemble them in Mexico, or before you left home? Thanks!!

I agree - definitely have a date for the wedding picked as well as estimated dates of travel. As for any further information, we didn't have any travel information when we sent our save the dates (sent approximately 16 months in advance of the wedding) but we had put together a wedding website and had it noted on there that the travel and resort info would follow. I think then it at least gives people an idea of where you're going and when, and if they want to come they can plan their yearly vacation accordingly. Also, keep in mind that a lot of people have to have their annual vacation in at the beginning of each year. Also something to note, that formal invitations will follow. If you are planning to do them, of course! Hope that helps; have fun setting a date!!

1. How old are you? 27 2. At what age did you/will you get married? 28 3. Do you have children? No 4. Did you think you would marry the person you are with now? Yes!! 5. Were you ever engaged or married to someone other than the person you are with now? No 6. Do you want a garden wedding, beach wedding, or the traditional church wedding? Beach 7. Where did you/will you get married? Las Caletas, Puerto Vallarta, Mexico 8. First dance - classic waltz, slow and sexy, or fast and spicy? A mix of Slow and Sexy and Fast and Spicy (we are having a combo of three songs) 9. How many guests did you/will you have? Around 20? (Best guess) 10. Do you want/did you have an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding? Simple 11. Vows - traditional or something you make up on your own? Making it up! 12. How many layers of cake did you/will you have? Maybe 3? 13. Is/was your wedding/reception at a hotel? No 14. When did you/will you get married - sunrise, mid-day, sunset? Sunset 15. Did you/will you have your reception outdoors or indoors? Outdoors 16. Plan every detail down to the napkins or let someone else decide? Little of column A, little of column B 17. How did/will the bride enter? Down a set of stairs, by myself 18. Song to walk down the aisle to: I am thinking "Marry Me" by Train 19. Song to make your exit: Currently, I am thinking "Good Life" by One Republic, but it is still over a year away!! 20. Will you/did you have a solemn ceremony or a light one? Light, but still meaningful 21. At what age did you think you would get married? 22 22. Who to invite - practically everyone or a select few? I would've preferred to invite a select few, but my fiancee prefers to keep the peace with his family, so we invited practically everyone 23. Wedding menu - fine dining or simply delicious? Simply delicious 24. Champagne or red wine? Champagne 25. Honeymoon right after the wedding, awhile after the wedding, or no honeymoon? Right after 26. Was your/will your honeymoon be at a place special to you both or somewhere brand new to you both? Special town, new hotel/resort 27. Who will pay for the bills? Us 28. Living together: Not before marriage or absolutely before marriage? Absolutely before marriage 29. Anything else about marriage you'd like to say? I knew from day 1 I wanted to marry him...and there's just over 400 days til we say I do!

I am a paralegal, working in a law firm.

Thanks!! I didn't want to keep people from finding out on their own...and I don't think anyone has been there before. Silly I guess...thanks!

My fiancee and I are getting married at Las Caletas, but we decided yesterday that the resort we will be staying at will be Dreams PV!! So excited! I think this thread is awesome, so glad I found it! It helped us choose Dreams, for sure! We are also getting a really great deal, which helped as well! All the best, safe travels and wonderful weddings to all you brides whose wedding dates are fast approaching!! Can't wait to hear all about it! And see pics.

Autjo: I just had to comment and say thanks for your review of Dreams PV. We have just decided to stay there when we come down for our wedding in December 2012. We actually have the same wedding date as you, December 5!! We are going to be getting married at Las Caletas and I am even more excited to stay at Dreams after your review. So thanks again! Your wedding looked awesome and you looked very beautiful! Was it chilly? Is that why the pashminas came in so handy??

I think it's a really good idea to call your mom to talk about things, especially since it doesn't seem like she's going to pick up the phone and talk to you about it. That being said, we all have our different ways of showing our parents respect, and choosing for ourselves whether or not to put their names on the invitations. Neither sets of my or my fiancee's parents are helping to pay for the wedding, therefore none of their names are appearing on the invitations. I think it's a little harsh to say that not putting your parents' names on the invitations is a slap in the face when you do not know everything about a person's upbringing or about their wedding. I think that especially with having a destination wedding, you should do things however you want. It just sucks to have to deal with people's unkind words, especially when they don't come forward with them. We have been faced with a lot of upset people in our family, and it's so hard during what is supposed to be a beautiful, happy time. In a perfect world... So, cdc150, hope it helps to hear you're not the only one to deal with unexpected family drama and that you can work it out with your mom. After all, at the end of the day, she'll be there to celebrate with you, right?

Good for you for not formally inviting them to your wedding! A recurring theme I've seen on the BDW forum is that it is your wedding and you should do what it takes to make you happiest on your special day! You and your fiancee are allowed to be selfish! You are the ones that are getting married! Good story and advice, JayKay.

We are having a destination wedding because we met in Mexico and have always talked about going back there to get married! And once we had the vision of the ocean as the backdrop when we say our vows, there was no going back! Not to mention that I agree with all of the reasons all of the other Brides have put out there. I cannot envision us getting married anywhere else in the world and I think we're getting more bang for our buck to go away to get married. It'll be so much fun on more than one day...how can you beat that?!?! Also, they basically all of the work!! And in skipping out on a traditional wedding means that we can set aside other traditional things and have our own, unique, non-traditional wedding.

OMG that logo is showing up huge on my computer... OOPS. Sorry.

PS: Very well said. I just had to read it again!!

We are definitely the lucky ones! And through all of the hard times that have come since we confirmed our DW date, it has really solidified to me and my fiancee that we are doing what we want in having a DW. The best part is going to be walking away as husband and wife, and knowing that we never gave up on our dream to have a beach DW.

My mom is Native American and my dad is Croatian. My fiancee is french-Canadian.

My biggest stressor has been our families as well. From my dad completely refusing to come (even though he is an avid traveller to Mexico and will be going a mere 3 months after our wedding - his disappointment is that he wants to throw a huge Croatian wedding where I grew up and invite a whole bunch of people that I don't even know and that don't speak the same language as us) to my fiancee's brother making a fuss about not being able to afford it (ummm, when we got engaged, the wedding date was 18 months away!) and refusing to accept help from us financially and then changing his argument to say that he won't take his kids to Mexico or leave them behind and that we're being insensitive because he has a family now, to my future inlaws making drama over the fact that his brother and grandma and other family members won't be there, it's been extremely difficult! Family, I tell ya!! Even though we know that it only matters that two people show up (myself and my future husband) hearing crap from everyone sucks. I feel ya, stluciabound!! I am happy that you got an apology and wish the best for you and yours and your families.

Great to know they still have them! I was just about to ask...

Here's our logo - It is nice and simple and exactly what we wanted!! It was perfect for making stickers for the back of envelopes on the save the dates. We also had help from a friend that is a graphic designer.

My fiancee and I met almost three years ago at a wedding in Mexico. Neither one of us knew the bride or groom (I think I had met them once before) and we had gotten free trips from the people we went with. I was offered the trip by my mom, who is friends with the mother of the bride, and my fiancee went with a friend whose dad couldn't make the trip. We tease that we were freeloading wedding crashers. So, seeing that we met and fell in love in Mexico, there was never any doubt in our minds that we would return to Puerto Vallarta to get married ourselves!!

Thanks ladies, for the support! Here's the pic...it is showing up kind of big, so it's a nice close-up of my foot! This picture was taken the day after the tattoo was done, so it's still a little red.

Pressed enter before I was done... And before we got engaged I told him that my only stipulation for when we got married was that it doesn't happen when he is 29 and I am 30.

I am 27 and my fiancee is 26. Every year for almost 2 months, I am 2 years older than him, by the numbers. When we get married, I will be 28 and he will be 27.

And for my own confession: I do not want my future brother-in-law and his wife and kids to come to our wedding. This is no surprise to my fiancee because we both think his brother is a terrible person, but it's his brother so he wants him there. (The brother has put up a big fuss about money and now about never taking his kids to Mexico so I don't think they're going to make it anyways, but I still have my fingers crossed!) And another confession, for good measure...I really want to tell all of the people who have been negative and selfish about our DW to go screw themselves, right to their faces!! It's our dream wedding and there's nothing anyone can do to change our minds!! (Especially now that the deposit has been paid.)

You could ask her what she is going to wear to the wedding. If she says something about a bridesmaid dress, then just say something about how you know that, silly, but ask her what she thinks about your colour and whether she is okay with wearing the same style as the other bridesmaids or does she think it'll look nice for each girl to pick their own style (of course, that will only work if you are laid back about the bridesmaid dresses...I personally think it's nice when a bridal party has the same colour/fabric dresses, all done in different styles...but even if you aren't easy going about it, you are the bride and always reserve the right to change your mind!). If she says she hasn't picked out an outfit yet, then you know you never asked her! There's only a slim chance she'll think you forgot...but that is the case, so would it be that bad?? Hopefully that helps, or you've figured it out on your own!! You could also get your fiancee to ask her...I'm assuming he's a dude, so he wouldn't necessarily remember if she was a bridesmaid or not.