Peach

Yes, there are lots of brides doing at home receptions. I am having a full one (like a regular reception almost, thought that originally was not the intent...) a month after our return. Now it is all getting close!

I am hoping mine comes clean enough to wear it for my AHR. I am hoping...

1. How old are you? 28 2. At what age did you/will you get married? 28 3. Do you have children? not yet 4. Did you think you would marry the person you are with now? yes - I knew years ago. 5. Were you ever engaged or married to someone other than the person you are with now? no 6. Do you want a garden wedding, beach wedding, or the traditional church wedding? beach 7. Where did you/will you get married? Gran Bahia Principe Cayo Levantado 8. First dance - classic waltz, slow and sexy, or fast and spicy? ummm... fast and sweet, actually. 9. How many guests did you/will you have? 12 (plus the 2 of us) 10. Do you want/did you have an extravagant wedding or a simple wedding? simple. I was hoping for a few more people, but there was drama, so it is what it is. and I am pleased with 12 11. Vows - traditional or something you make up on your own? traditional. We are exchanging notes privately with personal vows before the ceremony. 12. How many layers of cake did you/will you have? whatever comes with the package- I think just one for our group. 13. Is/was your wedding/reception at a hotel? It is at our resort. 14. When did you/will you get married - sunrise, mid-day, sunset? Late afternoon 15. Did you/will you have your reception outdoors or indoors? Outside by the pool. 16. Plan every detail down to the napkins or let someone else decide? I do not stress too much over details, but I do plan them. I just like to plan, and I am DIYing a lot (an excuse to craft? Yes please!) So that is translating to detailed planning. 17. How did/will the bride enter? I arrive on a golf cart I think, then down the aisle (on the sand!) 18. Song to walk down the aisle to: An instrumental version of Kiss the Girl from Little Mermaid 19. Song to make your exit: We Go Together, from the movie Grease 20. Will you/did you have a solemn ceremony or a light one? somewhere in between, but probably more light 21. At what age did you think you would get married? before 25 22. Who to invite - practically everyone or a select few? Wanted to invite practically everyone - which is not that many - but, again, drama... so I was good with the select few. 23. Wedding menu - fine dining or simply delicious? simply delicious... though it looks like fine dining from what I can tell at this point! 24. Champagne or red wine? Champagne please! And white wine too... But it is a special occasion. Any excuse for champagne! 25. Honeymoon right after the wedding, awhile after the wedding, or no honeymoon? The honeymoon is built into the wedding trip... we are staying an extra week. 26. Was your/will your honeymoon be at a place special to you both or somewhere brand new to you both? We are staying at the same resort. We wanted to go somewhere we have never been before, and a little more extravagant than usual. 27. Who will pay for the bills? We were planning on it, but have been pleasantly surprised throughout planning with generous parents. My parents bought my dress (I paid for alterations) and will pay for the music at our AHR. His parents have chipped in here and there (like picking up supplies for invitations...) and then were super generous by paying for our trip without our knowledge! Everything else we pay for. 28. Living together: Not before marriage or absolutely before marriage? We have been living together a long time... We met almost 10 years ago, and moved in pretty quickly after. I know some couples who do not believe in this, but personally I think it was very important to our relationship. We figured a lot of stuff out through living together. 29. Anything else about marriage you'd like to say? Um, just that planning a wedding is fun... but it is a party. It is a party that symbolizes the commitment you have made. But the commitment itself... that happens regardless of the colours or music or even the dress. It happens when you are upset and can talk it out, when you say you are sorry, when you laugh together. The wedding is just a way to publicly announce that commitment to the world. And it is a lot of fun too!

Hi I just sent them to you. Hopefully that works.

Yeah, both showers are pretty much out of my hands. My bridesmaid and maid of honour is taking care of the one - I was not even sure if it would be appropriate to have one. But they insisted, and I am glad they did. It depends on your friends and family I think.

Well I am new to this too.... my sister is my maid of honour. She and my bridesmaid got a list of ladies to invite to my stagette, and they invited all of them to the shower. Then she asked for a list of my coworkers, Other than that, my sister just asked whoever.... family and community ladies in my home town. It is being held in the basement of my parents' church (which I grew up in), so I believe there was even a note in the bulletin saying the ladies of the church were welcome. So other than the list I originally gave for my stagette, and my coworkers, I have no control over my guest list. Plus, the ladies at work are throwing me a separate shower next month. And none of them were invited to my DW (but they will be invited to my AHR open house). So I guess it all depends.

How many people are coming to your wedding? We only invited a few people... everyone we would have on his side, no one on mine (except immediate family). Drama issues. So there are only 14 of us now. Which is actually more than we thought. We originally thought 20, until the family drama showed up. So we are happy with the 14. That is mostly the reason we are having an AHR... for my family. So if they want to bring gifts, they can. And if not, I am not offended.

Yes, I wondered about this, but my bridesmaid (who is not even coming to the DW) insisted on throwing me one, which I love. My reasoning is that I am having an AHR... and an open house is part of that. Most of the ladies going to my shower (I think) will be attending the AHR. From asking around, everyone kind of thought the same thing. They are seeing it more like a celebration and less focused on gifts. I think it depends on the type of wedding. I have been to showers for friends when I could not come to the wedding for religious reasons. I think it is in really bad taste to invite people who are not invited to a regular wedding, but when there is a solid reason, then that is a different scenario altogether. Some of those etiquette rules are a little dated I think, and do not really apply to non-traditional weddings. Of course, you know your friends/family/community best. If it seems like they would be offended, maybe revisit the idea of having a shower.

Okay, so I have made a pre-travel packet to send out to our guests. There is a brochure, packing list, and luggage tags... and I know it seems a little dated, but in the packet I am also including a CD full of island music (emphasis on love songs, but focus more on the vibe we are after). Anyway... my question is, what should I call the CD? I am just writing on it with a sharpie... nothing too exciting that way. It just needs a title. I was thinking something like, "To Get You in the Island Spirit..." but I do not really like it. Anyway, any ideas would be much appreciated. I am a big fan of wit and clever puns; I am just totally out of ideas on this one. Thanks so much in advance.

exactly, and you can order online, and they are everywhere. So it is versatile for my guests.

Perfect! Thank you so much for answering my questions. And I LOVE the photos. I just think the cenote photos are so unique and incredible.

Great find! I found my MOH dress at Forever 21 too!!! It looks great, and you cannot beat that price! Good work!

OH MY GOSH these pictures are AMAZING!!! Thank you so much for posting them! Do the dresses ever actually get wrecked in the water? I have heard varying reports. I know that some girls go all out and actually trash the dress, and some do not... can you be in the ocean or cenotes and "accidentally" trash the dress? Does that happen? I want to wear my own dress... but was also planning on wearing it to my AHR a month after!

We registered at Sears, and are glad we did. We did have everything we needed... lived together 10 years, and I worked at a kitchen store throughout University! But I know unconventional gifts would go over poorly in my family. So we registered. I know some people like that we did, but most of my family lives in a tiny town in the middle of the prairies, which is where my shower is (coming up on Sunday!)... but it still helped; my sister downloaded the list and printed it off to give to grandparents, great aunts, etc.... that way they could see colours and items, and get similar ideas, or find the same items at other places. We actually found lots of stuff to register for. We upgraded a lot of things. Most of our stuff was hand-me-downs or really inexpensive and older, so we registered for a few upgrades and things like that. I am getting really excited for the shower! And then a little over a week later the ladies I work with are throwing me one too! I am really looking forward to it!

Oh no! What are they doing to make you feel badly? You have nothing to feel bad about!

I have two teenagers coming... it depends on their ages and genders though. There would be a huge difference between a boy, age 13, and a girl age 17. What about a magazine in whatever they are into? Celebrity, cars, whatever. Headphones. Hmm, actually, they will likely already have their own. If you have to pay a fee for the Internet at your resort, you could pay that for him/her. Maybe an inflatable tube or something for floating? You can find them at Walmart and some dollar stores. Other than that, I like the ideas given so far. We are giving our teenagers the same things as the adults, but they will also be 17 and 18 when we travel, so basically adults. (I guess the one technically is...)

I wish this was an option for us... it sounds so helpful!

I wish this was an option for us... it sounds so helpful!

What about bringing her back a nice souvenir from your destination?

What about bringing her back a nice souvenir from your destination?

Your invites should set the tone for your event. So, if you want a more casual, laid-back reception, casual, laid-back invites should be perfect! I am sending invites to our AHR in May; it is in August, so I could wait until late June, but I wanted people to know before they took off on summer vacations. So keep the holiday season in mind when planning your AHR. The dates you suggested should sound fine, but I would recommend letting people know a couple months in advance, since schedules get busy shortly after that. Hope that helps!

Oh, you mean you are doing a whole legal ceremony there? We thought about doing that originally, but opted to save some money and stress and do it here first.... I much prefer the idea to doing an actual legal wedding there though.

Yes we sure do! I agree - the borrow item IS the most difficult!

This sounds like exactly what I wanted... before family got involved. Hahaha! Since the vibe you are going for is casual, you will want the invite to set that tone, so I think it is definitely okay to mention on there that they bring whatever you would like them to bring. What about some simple games, along with the ones the park provides? You could even go all out and have a couple contests (maybe have the prize be something from the destination). Just keep your vision in mind, and it will work out. Can you have a bonfire? You could do smores. Keep the food simple - salads, BBQ, maybe even squares. Have fun with it!

Something very unconventional. We have a different one; we are borrowing the one FI's parents (and his grandparents!) used for our AHR. But we decided to go funky for our DW. So, our DIY unconventional cake topper: What do you think? Something kind of fun and very unique! Totally my FI's idea.