Quote:Originally Posted by mrsgatc Complete opposite situation but still the "What is wrong with people" heading. My FI (now hubby) and I were engaged in November. His brother and his FI were engaged about two years ago. We have talked for a while about going away and doing our weddings at the same place. Not a double wedding, just the 4 of us going together. We respectfully asked that people allow us to do this on our own. I lost my father 5 years ago and he lost his just in October. Our families do not get along (i.e. his mom and sister fight like siblings and my sisters fight like, well, siblings) among multiple other reasons. Additionally, his family is huge and if you do anything you have to invite all 80 of them. We do not have the money (and more than anything the desire) to do a big wedding. At any rate, feelings were hurt (which we expected) but everyone knows us and knows that this is what we have always wanted. I am respectful of the fact that we hurt feelings. But I also know that both of us would have been miserable trying to plan and execute a big traditional wedding (it would have been no less than 200 people). When we got engaged, we planned a destination wedding in Jamaica with just the 4 of us. We would get married, they would get married--in separate ceremonies--and we would all enjoy a drama and stress free wedding/honeymoon together. I took the moms dress shopping with me and have included them in any way they wished with planning our party for when we got back. Everyone had finally come around and was excited for us despite the fact they weren't coming. Fast forward to this past Saturday. We moved wedding times around to accomodate photo/video needs etc--not a big deal since it was just the 4 of us. Our ceremony was at 10am, followed by a short reception and pictures. I then showered, changed to help future SIL get ready for her ceremony at 2. As I am getting out of the shower, hubby comes in and tells me that his mother has SHOWED UP uninvited to the resort. Ugh. (yes I know I am a horrible person for not inviting anyone but we figured that it was better than lying and sneaking around). So I go down to the salon to tell SIL the news so she isn't surprised with it while walking down the isle (woudn't make for pretty pictures). She is as angry as I am about it and starts crying out of pure frustration. I talked to MIL for about 30 seconds only because she spotted me before I could duck out of the way. I was cordial but not overly friendly. MIL is now angry with me because I wasn't excited to see her. And on top of that, the cousin that came with her is apparently running around town bragging about crashing our wedding. SERIOUSLY??? Why couldn't she respect our wishes to have a private ceremony? Not only that, but you want to go home and BRAG about it??? And WHAT makes her think that she is invited on my honeymoon? My mother is appauled with her for showing up. She would have loved to be there herself (as would SIL's family) but respected us enough to not sneak around on us. SIL father is pissed because he got wind of the bragging about crashing the wedding before she ever got home. Apparently he is so angry he couldn't even watch their dvd of the ceremony. If that's not sad, I don't know what is. Am I wrong for wanting a private ceremony??? We are having a party next weekend to celebrate with family and friends. I am stressed beyond belief about what kind of scene this woman is going to make at it in front of all the other people that are important to us. That and I am PISSED that within hours of our wedding she is already playing him against me and trying to pull us apart. THIS after she has spent the last 5 years relentlessly hounding us about getting married and she didn't care how and on and on, just htat we needed to quit living in sin blah blah blah... Anyway, sorry to crash the thread. I can't and won't talk badly about his mother to him (because unlike her, I respect him and don't want to put him in that position) so I needed somewhere to vent. Any input, positive or negative is welcome. I just needed to get that off my chest.