CanadianLindsey

I think that is really inconsiderate to you and your FI. Maybe I'm selfish, but we told guests that wanted to invite other people that we would be very upset if they even came to the resort. We plan on having a week long party with all of our guests since they are spending all of this money to join us. Everyone is welcome to do what they want on the six non wedding days or join us in our pre arranged excursions and events. I don't mind if guests choose to spend their whole vacation by the pool and not join us for any of the events, it is their vacation, but I would be offended if they spent the whole time with someone I didn't even invite or know.

Quote: Originally Posted by hat0112 Well the couple registered but they got everything at the shower. I am not close with them and the only reason I am in the wedding is because we are related and she needed another girl in the wedding (found out after I said yes). I went to 2 other weddings this year in the same family and I am not close with them either and all they got was $50 so she won’t get more than that. I wouldn’t be so bitter, but at the bridal shower the mother in law planned the entire thing then asked the bridesmaids for $250 each (there are 7 of us)! She didn’t even consult us on any of it and didn’t even ask for the money, we were just expected to give it! And the bride knew about all of it. I know being a bridesmaid means paying money, but I also should have a say. The bride and the groom planned the bachelor/ette party too, and that was expensive. Oh, I feel for you! The fact that your in this sticky situation changes all of the rules. You have to do what you feel comfortable with. If you would rather save face than save money, then just give them a gift($50/guest is standard in my opinion, especially if your not close). If you cannot afford a gift then just get them a nice card and wish them well with a heartfelt note. Weddings should not be about the gifts anyways!!

Especially if you are paying for this dress you should say something. Being a bridesmaid is super expensive already, let alone buying a dress you will never wear again! A real friend will take into consideration how you feel and I'm guessing if your a bridesmaid then you two are close. She may just be so stressed and pulled in a million different wedding directions that she didn't notice the disappointment on your face or how it fit you. Also, sometimes we are our own worst critics. Try the dress on with someone you trust that is not involved with the wedding and see how they feel about the dress. Good luck!

Quote: Originally Posted by DAP8479 I am glad to see that I am not the only one having all these issues. I am the last of my immediate family to get married. My two other sisters got beautiful expensive weddings at home. My parents have told my FI and me that they are tapped out. We didn’t want to go broke over a wedding so we decided to do a destination wedding. My two best friends (who I wanted to be bridesmaids) have told me that they will not be attending due to their financial situations. My parents are also not excited over the idea. Everyone on my side is giving me grief over the cost. I feel so sad that my FI has so many supportive people on his end and on my side I am getting so much resistance. I wanted to call the whole thing off but I read this thread and I now know the most important thing is that a DW is what my FI and I want and that’s all that counts! Good for you!! My FI is in the same boat as you, his parents are the only family that can come. But we have always wanted to do a DW and now a lot of our recently married friends are saying how they wish they would've had a DW instead of giving into the pressure to do the traditional wedding. Just be selfish for once!!!

I know everyone is different and has different priorities, but if a true engagement and/or ring is what you want then you have to tell him that. He may think that asking you without a ring or grand gesture is an engagement, for some people it is. My FI and I have been together since high school and lived together for 4 years so we've known for a long time we would get married. I always told him when the subject of marriage came up that my only requirement about an engagement was that it be a surprise, no fireworks or extraordinary plans needed. Well after ruining his first plan(it's hard for boys to be sneaky when you share a bank account!) and causing a huge fight, he finally proposed 2 years later. It was the best feeling to just be utterly shocked, although when I called family and friends none of them were! Tell him how you feel, what you want, lay it all out on the table and then try and let it go(I know from experience, it is really hard to do) And planning a wedding without being engaged...I feel like you girls are robbing yourself of some of the best parts of being engaged. If this is the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with then you need to be honest and open with him. He may be not be ready for marriage or he may just be oblivious. This is what I would tell my sister or a friend if she were in the same position, so I hope no one is offended by my honesty.

I don't think I am bringing my real e-ring. Looks like I'm the only one though! I just bought a fake one at Claire's that looks similar to mine to wear for the week of the wedding. I don't want to be worried about it all week long and I never wear it in the water because it is a bit loose. I know I would just die if I lost it since it's irreplaceable! And I don't trust the room safes. We are having a symbolic ceremony and we've made up a wedding contract so that we have something to sign because we won't have a legal marriage certificate. It is just a cute little promise we wrote to each other. I figure if our "marriage license" is a fake, then heck, why not our rings!

Yay, you picked dress one!! That colour is very flattering on you. Maggie Sottero dresses are so comfortable and beautifully made(can you tell mine is a Maggie too!) Congrats!

Quote: Originally Posted by tracy0716 Ahhh the stamps! I hadn't even considered my beautiful RSVP stamps! My mom is going to be so pissed...she paid for them and paid almost double to get beautiful beach stamps from zazzle. Nice to know we're not alone...I wish people were more considerate. Me too! We spent double the price of the stamps to get our puppy's picture made into a stamp, and most of the RSVP's that I stamped never made it back! What a waste!

Our deadline has come and gone and we haven't heard from more than a few people. Too bad for them, we already booked everyone! The worst one is a friend that sent us an invite to her wedding, which I RSVP to before it was due, and then she didn't RSVP to ours. She of all people should understand about needing a guest count for favors and caterers, etc. I have a feeling a lot of it has to do with the DW factor! Argh!!

We booked a regular suite for the first week to be close to our guests and then the swim up Casitas the second week for our honeymoon. It worked out well since we got the first week free as part of a Canadian Bride/Groom stay free promo and needed to book a Casitas to get the FREE SWEET WEDDING package. I'm so excited to see the Casitas, my FI is especially excited for the outdoor shower!

DW always seem to be met with some sort of resistance by guests or non guests for every bride and groom, as I am learning personally too. I just keep telling myself that all of these tough decisions on who to invite, explaining why we are doing this, etc, will all be worth it when my FI and I are standing on the sunny beach, waves crashing, surrounded by friends and family that cared enough to come. Happy and married!

Quote: Originally Posted by amandagee Oh and I dont plan on having an actual AHR because I figure it ends up being just like a real wedding would be. The most I plan on doing when we get home is hosting a bbq in our new backyard. We are looking at houses right now and I think it would be great to have a housewarming/congrats on your wedding party for all those people we love I completely agree about the cost of AHR! Sounds awesome to have a housewarming/just married BBQ in your new home! It will be more intimate too. I am hopeful that we will have a house by next summer to do the same!

I bought my dress at Bridal Debut in Sh. Park after having some bad experiences at Pure Bridal and Sposabella(wouldn't even let me look since my wedding was too far away!). At Pure Bridal they thought my price limit of 1K was laughable and the fact that I wanted a lace up back never seemed to register as she kept bringing me zippered dresses. Finally(at the request of my Grandmother!) we just bailed on the appointment. The extremely rude consultants were a surprise as you would think bridal dress shopping should be a fun experience for everyone. Good thing we were able to laugh about it later! I got my Maggie Sotterro from the trunk show at Bridal Debut last December for an amazing price, and since they aren't bring my dress in as a sample, I will be the only one with it from Edmonton! For the photographer question, we are probably using a combo of the resort photographer and a family member who we've asked to take photos too, just in case the pro doesn't work out. The resort charges $500 to bring in an outside vendor, so make sure you ask about that before booking a local photographer.

Luckily your from Ottawa so your flights will be direct no matter where you choose to go in the Caribbean. We chose Cancun because of the direct flights and the area of the Mayan Riviera has so much to do outside the resorts for our adventurous guests. From there we just picked a few resorts that had features we needed(disco, 5 star food, located on the beach) and ones that had WCs that came highly recommended, since they are the one person you deal with until you actually get to your resort. The Karisma Resorts have US based WCs which helps with the language barrier! Good luck and pick more than one since price and other factors can knock out a resort and you don't want to feel overwhelmed starting from scratch again.

Quote: Originally Posted by ablj209 So far, I have only 1 uninvited guest. My MOH's mother has invited herself to Punta Cana. As she explains, it's a public resort, anyone can go at any time. This is fine, however, we have informed her that she will not be participating in any of the wedding events. She will not attend the sunset dinner cruise the night before the wedding, there will not be a chair for her at the ceremony or the semi-private reception. As for the rest of the week, if she wants to hang out with her daughter and the rest of us, then that's okay! WOW!! Some people's lack of judgment and humiliation is unbelievable! I am just shocked that people don't understand that destination weddings are just as important as hometown ones, not some free-for-all family reunion or something! The best thing I've heard since we decided on a destination wedding was from my crazy FMIL..."So is this a REAL wedding?" To which my quick thinking FI responded "no, it's just for show!" Oh how I love him!!

We have had the same problem after specifically writing on our invitation info card: "Please understand that due to resort restrictions on our number of guests, we are unable to allow uninvited guests to attend. If you would like us to arrange for a room mate to save on costs please indicate in your reply card and we would be happy to do so." We mostly put this to avoid uninvited friends from our large group of friends from just booking the trip and showing up and for the singles to understand why they couldn't bring a guest. The funny thing is, my sister ended up being the only one who tried to break this rule! She just recently started dating someone after we sent out the invites and thought that because she was my sister the rules didn't apply. My FI and I are just not willing to open up that can of worms by allowing her to bring a guest and not every other single. As it turned out, we found room mates for everyone and it has worked out...we still have 8 months before the wedding for someone else to ask though!! The best advice I've received is that even though guests are paying for their own vacation, this is your wedding and(without being completely unreasonable!) you and your FI need to be happy and anyone who can't understand that obviously doesn't care enough about the two of you to even worry about!

Our budget is about the same as yours. We chose a more "expensive" 5 star resort, the El Dorado Royale(although with group discounts and wedding packages it's turning out to be the same price as trips I've taken to other resorts in the Mayan) For my FI and I, we decided that since the setting and service will be so amazing we won't have to spend more money or time for extras like decor or expensive welcome bags for our guests as they will get the whole experience from the resort. Besides I want to limit the amount of stuff I try to cross the border with! I think paying a bit more up front will make me feel better about the service I'll get once I'm there. But I do agree with the other girls though, you have to do a lot of looking and research and talking with your FI and possible guests before you decide what's important to you and what resort fits your day. Good Luck!!

Quote: Originally Posted by echo2_62 Two things for Alberta - you need to go with FI and get a marriage license which takes about 10-15min at the registry Marriage License Info and then you need to find a marriage commissioner that is in your area who you would like to have perform the 'ceremony' for you Getting Married & commmissioner info - you could also have someone from a church do it but if you don't go somewhere already it can be a little bit tricky. Thanks! Those links were really helpful.

Originally Posted by Rhonda "Photographer – For photographer, I chose Citlally from Claudia Rodriguez. She is one of the EDR approved photographers. Although I haven’t seen any of our photos yet, she was very sweet and a pleasure to work with. She even extended her stay so that she could get photos of the cake cutting, which I thought was so nice and definitely not necessary. Spa- I was booked at the Casita Spa for my nail, hair, and makeup appointments on the wedding day. I had Erika and she did a great job! I was a little nervous about what to expect, but, she did exactly what I wanted. I brought a picture of my hairstyle that I had done at home and she did it exactly how I wanted (even better). For makeup, I only said I wanted “natural looking†and again, she did it perfect! My mom, sister, and bridesmaid also got their hair done and all came out great too!" Hi Rhonda! I was wondering if you would mind if I asked a few questions about prices? How much was the make-up and hairstyling at the spa for you and your mom/sister? Also for the photography, what package did you choose and was it worth it? My FI wants to just rely on guests photos and disposable cameras we are giving as placeholders at the reception, but I still think we need some professional help! I just need help convincing him it's worth it, so any info you have would help me! Thanks!

I'm thinking of just heading out to the airport with my dress and garment bag to confirm with the airline manager, in person, possibly getting whatever they say in writing too. It will be a pain, but much better to deal with it now than right before my flight/wedding and in front of all of our guests. I'm just hoping for some compassion, c'mon, it's a wedding dress and half of the plane will be our guests anyways!

Can anyone recommend someone in Alberta that could do the same thing? We were told by our travel agent to use a justice of the peace, would it be the same thing? I thought it was just paperwork, didn't know we would need witnesses!

Hey Girls! I am getting married Dec 1, 2010 at the El Dorado Royale...hopefully! My FI and I have been hearing that December is really popular and while we have sent out invites, we haven't booked rooms yet so we are worried we won't get the prices or space we need. It seemed like when we first got engaged last summer everyone was saying "your too early to get prices or book anything" now we may have waited too long! Oh no!! I did order my dress before Christmas, but otherwise we haven't get much figured out. I'm hoping everyone's info on here will be able to help with the rest!

Has anyone tried to bring a gluten free cake mix to a resort to have them make it as their wedding cake? I am thinking of doing this, but I'm just worried about the lack of knowledge about cross contamination. Betty Crocker Gluten Free cake mixes aren't available in Canada yet, but Celimix has a great chocolate cake mix and Kinnikinicks always has awesome mixes(find both in Sobey's). I'm so happy to have found this forum and this thread! I was just avoiding the topic of my celiac's when it came to my wedding planning...it's always such a pain to explain and deal with, but now I don't feel like I'll have to worry so much! Oh and also, last time I went to Mexico I just packed lots of rice crackers and gf bars/cookies in my checked luggage with no problem, so I think this time I'll do the same. They came in handy for days when we left the resort and midnight snacks.

Hi! I'm Lindsey and I am getting married December 2010 in the Mayan Riviera(haven't booked a resort yet but thinking of the El Dorados), just joined the forum and hoping to get some advice and tips since I am starting to find this destination wedding planning a bit confusing! It has always been our dream to have a beach wedding and I know it will all be worth it in the end!