Wow. It seems like you have a lot going on! I cannot really relate because I have never had anything like your experiences happen to me but what I can relate to is your unhappiness! I am so sorry you are dealing with all of this and as bad as things are right now and with the way you are feeling it may be a good idea to postpone or call the wedding off for now. Your wedding day is something you should look back on as the happiest day of your life, and it doesn't sound like there is a lot of happiness between you and your FI. Follow your heart and I'm sure you will make the right decision! Best of luck!
*HUGS*