Vikki

I can't imagine what you're going through. Planning your wedding is supposed to be a time to celebrate with your close friends, not deal with stress like this. It sounds like you've tried to make contact attempts to talk to her and clear the air without sucess. Sometimes email is an awful way to communicate, especially when there is already tension. It's so easy to take things the wrong way but since it's hard to contact her any other way I don't know that you have a choice. There are a couple things that come to my mind, for whatever that's worth. Will you be seeing her again soon? Could you take her aside and see if you can get down to the bottom of what is causing her to have this reaction? Let her know that your history and friendship is valuable to you and you want to understand what she's feeling. Is this relationship important enough to you to take more extreme steps (such as making a special trip) to accomplish a face to face meeting? (depending on where she is at the time this may not be possible) It's easy to say she's totally wrong and how awful she is but that really won't do anything to help or fix the situation. There is more going on than she is expressing to you and it's poisoning your relationship with her as well as your other friends. As an educated adult she should be open to some basic conflict resolution steps to try and clear the air. And if she's not you will know that you did everything you could to try and solve the problem and the ball is in her court now. I wish you the best and I know you'll get a lot of good ideas here and an opportunity to express your frustration-sometimes that's the most important thing.

I hope I'm posting this in the right place....it's kind of an etiqette question I think. Small bit of background: FI and I met online and he moved accross the country to live with me. He only knew a couple of guys out here when he moved and his job is remote so he doesn't have any co-workers in the office that he has developed relationships with. He's ok with all of that and his couple friends here are good buddies, they go out at least once a week. But I don't think anyone has thought of having any kind of bachelor party for him. This is his second marriage and the first bachelor party consisted of stealing a street sign and a move or two. (He was pretty young...) So I called one of his local friends and asked if he would put something together for FI a couple weeks before the wedding for a bachelor party. His buddies are BROKE so I asked him to give me an estimate of what he'd need and I'd fund it. (Within reason of course). FI's friend was fine with that and is going to talk it over with the other guys and get back to me. I just want FI to have the opportunity to go through that ritual, I think he'd love it and I'm getting to do so many things centered around me that it feels a little off balance. I know he'd get a huge kick out of a getting wasted in a limo and hitting the strip club. The question: I'm hoping I'm not stepping out of line though, does it seem innappropriate for me to initiate something like that?

I went to Taiwan last year and my passport was short, mousy brown hair and on our trip it was long and bleached....I don't think they even looked. Quote: Originally Posted by Jacilynda And now our wedding is in 2.5 weeks and he's grown out his beard again! Off topic but DAMN....only 2 1/2 weeks I didn't realize it was that close. You must be so excited. Hell, I'm excited for you!

Well the pictures are ready! I'm going to wait until the 27th to go in and view them so my friend can come with me (she helped with the outfit shopping) but I can't wait to see them so the photographer is going to put a couple online for me. She said she doesn't like to put them online until after I see them in the studio so I'll have to wait until the 27th to see the rest. I will post a link when they're up!

Great pictures! What a fun thing to do with your FSIL too. Both the hubbies will be thrilled with the results I'm sure!

Wow. I think it's great your posting the letter here. Not only will the BDW brides see it but depending on how a search engine picks it up he may find that many more potential clients are as turned off by his comments as you are. I would let him know you will continue looking for an experienced photographer, not someone trying to build a portfolio. Also inform him that you have shared his preferred client specifications for future reference of other brides.

Black is a great way to set off your white dress.....

It's amazing how many calories can be in food....I think most of the problem is the portion sizes! If you ate the right amount of food for a meal the calories wouldn't be so bad but when you have 3, 4 or even more portions on one plate it gets out of control. Yet we complain when we go to restaurants and get smaller portions..... When B and I eat out we have started splitting meals. I don't think we've ever left a restaurant hungry after doing that. It's ok to have foods that are high in calories and fat as long as you balance it out.

Ugh. Let me know what you decide. I also have shoulder length hair and it's so frustrating to have styled-it's that horrible in-between stage where I want to chop it all off but I'm so far into growing it I might as well keep going until it's long.....then I can cut it all off. I like it up but I don't think it's as flattering to my face as when it's down. I think I'll end up just having it loosely curled or something with flowers. I'm planning to work with my stylist 6 weeks before or something to find a look I like. The message board for my resort has had several positive reviews of the salon on location so I have my fingers crossed what ever I decide they can duplicate.

Nice thread! It's cool seeing what everyone works out to :-) I'm a huge House or Indie Dance fan for workouts myself. Here's the gym playlist I had on this morning. I have a ton...one for cardio, one for lifting, one for spinning, one for yoga/cooldown .... you get the point. I have a friend that's a DJ and feeds me mixes from time to time but I also like to hit up Beatport.com and browse for new workout tunes. It's kind of like iTunes but more club oriented. After Every Party I Die IAMXThe Alternative Cicada - Falling Rockets JAB Remix No Sudden Moves Original Mix Glenn Morrison More - Original MixJunkie XLBooming Back At You Where You Belong Torben BoswichI Move OnIndie Kiss And SwallowIAMXLive In WarsawElectronic Spit It Out IAMXLive In Warsaw Your Joy Is My LowIAMXLive In Warsaw President IAMXLive In Warsaw Italofuker - LAZRtag RemixDisco Bad Dream Machine - Original Mix Politics Mad Kit The Great Shipwreck Of Life IAMX Kingdom Of Welcome Addiction I'm Not Alone Deadmau5 Remix Happy Up HereRöyksopp MGMT - Kids (Soulwax remix) edit ArgumentsRobots in Disguise Girls - Tommie Sunshine Remix Dont Cry Out (Coburn remix) Shiny Toy Guns A Battle Hymn For ChildrenThe Faint Get SeducedThe Faint Le Disko (Tommie Sunshine's Brooklyn I Treat You WrongThe Faint The Sex Has Made Me Stupid Robots In Disguise The Geeks Were Right - Shadow Dancer Vocal Mix How Soon Is Now?The Smiths Hatful of Hollow Sweet Dreams (MM Cover) Angel Massive AttackAngel (Single) Blue MondayOrgyCandy Ass Roads PortisheadDummy Lovesong (full Version)Snake River Conspiracy Half Life Sneaker PimpsSplinter Destroying AngelSneaker PimpsSplinter Addicted - Oscar G. Space Maimi Remix

Quote: Originally Posted by Sapphire723 Heh, I would have handled it like this -- "You're going to buy us a brand new bedroom set, Mom?! That is SO THOUGHTFUL!" Haha - exactly! I know things will get better for you and your FI but until then I hope your mom can take a step back and realize what you're doing is smart. So many people buy things they can't afford, spend way too much money on material things just because "they're new!" and dig themselves into a huge financial hole. I think it's great that you and your FI are looking toward the future and doing what you can with a frustrating situation to get back on your feet. Your marriage will be so much stronger for it!

Aww sweetie. I'm so sorry this happened. I agree-don't cancel the wedding. Maybe do something special during your ceremony to honor and remember him? My grandfather passed away 3 weeks after we got engaged. (April 8th) He was so excited about the wedding and it was devastating for me when it happened. Like your FI my mom had a really rough time coping. I've seen my mom go through a lot of things but nothing like what she's been through the last couple of months. All I can say is sometimes when grieving, people need to do things that seem strange or abnormal. Sometimes it's a way of coming to grips with what's happened and the healing process. Just be patient if your FI seems to experience any of that. Some of the things my mom has initiated or pushed for as a result of my grandfather's death have been really out of character for her but she is making it through ok and it gets a little better each day. Just be there for him-your love and support right now is the most important thing you can give to help him.

I'm going to be ready before the FI is. I'm going to be 30 next year but like some of the others I don't feel like it's a good time financially. I own my house but it's small and it would be tight with a little one, the economy sucks so upgrading would probably be more difficult than a couple years ago. We both work but I make twice as much as he does and have all the health benefits. Ideally I would want to slow down my work when we have kids but I just don't see that as being possible for a long time. I'm also scared to death about my ability to be a good parent. The idea of pregnancy and having a baby are enchanting in theory but in reality there is so much more that happens and suddenly *poof* there's this little person that looks to me for every thing. I don't know what kind of role model I would make. So I guess if it's supposed to happen it will but I don't think we'll actively be trying for a couple of years, even though I would like to.

I'm so glad to hear I'm not the only one that bought then returned shoes...I had a couple guilty moments standing at the customer service return counters! Just check the return policy and make sure if it's on clearance or something that you can take it back-some stores only give in-store credit. I bought one pair at Ross and they already looked like they had been tried on or possibly worn before and I thought I might have trouble returning them so I had the lady write on the receipt that I had purchased them with wear. When I took them back it was no problem because I had her note. Good luck shopping!

Great job ladies!!! Congratulations to our top losers! This was tons of fun. I always seem to have trouble getting that last little bit of weight off and this contest did it for me :-) My weight loss goal was to lose about 10lbs. Even though I didn't end quite that low I lost inches and probably some bodyfat. My real goal was to feel like a million bucks for my BD photo session and I did! There is no way 12 weeks ago I would have posed in some of the outfits I rocked on Tuesday. Thanks to my buddy Jackie - even though I stopped using my bodybugg half way through the program I still lost weight and that's the first time I've been able to go without the bodybugg and not gain it back. I'm hoping I can finally stop wearing it all the time.... I'm sure the extra accountability made the difference. The SHD didn't really work for me in terms of weight loss but I felt great and had more energy during the week I used it. I will plan on using this once a month to offset my normal PMS cycle. If nothing else discovering something to help me during that week is priceless!!! I got lazy with the before and after pictures so I'll try and take an after picture later this week but if nothing else I'll post the link to my BD teasers since they were taken the day before the end of the contest. I'm sorry to hear there might have been some issues along the way but I'm glad that inspite of that people saw results and enjoyed the process. I enjoyed getting to know the group and I'm kind of sad to be done *sigh*. Thanks everybody!

I'm at work and I don't exactly want to go searching for this but if you google "boudoir photography" there are some great sites that have tips for making your pictures great and a couple of the pages I visited had a list of things to keep in mind when taking your own. Ideas about how to make the lighting better, tips for angles, ect. I hope that helps!

Wow-you look amazing! Can't wait to see the rest of them when you post them.

I'm so glad I kept a positive attitude. That first reaction was a little stressful (who can blame me :-) but when I reminded myself this was just for fun and to enjoy it no matter what it's like the entire day just turned around and things turned out better than I could have planned. First-I went to my hair appointment and as I was sitting down with my stylist we were visiting about the change in my plans and she mentioned one of the girls there had just gotten back from an Aveda conference in NY for make-up application. It happens to be the girl who does my waxing and guess what-she had a cancellation at the same time I was there! How cool is that? I was her first application since the new show techniques and she had a lot of fun using the new techniques and spent a lot of time making it just perfect. Plus-my eyes tend to get dry and red with make up and I was worried about the MAC make-up. I've never had a reaction to Aveda and my eyes held up the whole time without getting red or itchy. My stylist then created a perfect, sultry look with my hair and I was good to go. Second-The photographer was amazing. We were scheduled for about an hour and a half but ended up shooting for a total of 3 hours. She had a kickboxing class to teach but didn't want to rush me so we stopped for about 90 minutes while she did her class and I took some much needed time to relax then came back and finished up the rest. I'm going to go preview them early next week and get my book ordered. I'll link the online ones as soon as she puts them up for me.

I don't think she has anyone else-it was her idea for me to use her make up girl, I was planning on scheduling my salon to do it when they did my hair but she was really selling me on the on-site make up and touch up so I agreed. I'm sure it will work out ok. Now that I've had a chance to take a deep breath I'm just going to go make the best of it-the last thing I want is to be frustrated or uncomfortable while I'm taking the pictures, I just want to have a good time and as long as I keep that attitude it will be ok! Maybe I'll just indulge in an extra adult beverage or two *wink* I'm off to the salon-I'll update after I get home tonight. (And thanks for the picture idea...I'm not sure what I can find last minute but I think it would be best to try and give the MAC people a visual idea of what I'm looking for rather than a vague description)

I emailed my photographer yesterday morning to confirm our appointment for my BD shots. I've got pictures scheduled for today at 3:30. I have to work until 12:00, have a hair appointment at 12:30 and a mani/pedi right after that so when I got the following email this morning I went into panic mode: "I just heard from my makeup artist today. She has bronchitis or something and can’t make it. If you would like to have your makeup done, I would recommend stopping by Mac in the mall for their makeup—all you have to do is buy a lipstick or something. I hope this doesn’t throw you off too much. Let me know if that works. See you tomorrow--we’re going to have fun!" I'm terrible at make up and don't really own much, I was really counting on having a professional there to put together a perfect look for the camera then touch it up to go with my different outfits-if you saw my other post I've put a lot of work into getting ready for this shoot. It's too late for me to change my hair and nail appointments without a cancellation penalty. Now I'm going to have to rush to the mall after the other appointments, buy make up I won't use after today and worry about keeping it touched up during the pictures. I'm really frustrated but I guess there's not much I can do about it. Maybe I can ask the photographer for a discount or something. I did pay a $50 deposit to reserve the make up girl so I'm sure I'll get that back but is it's appropriate to ask for something additional for the last minute inconvenience?

I love to read but I'm lean more toward the fantasy/fiction genre. Maxx Barry has the funniest writing style. His books are fiction. Called Sugar, The Company and Jennifer Government. I've never laughed so hard reading. They are a satirical look at marking, corporate life and other ridiculous institutions. For the fantasy genre I love David Eddings (Belgariad and Mallorean series), J.K.Rowling (Harry Potter), Margaret Weis and Tracy Hickman (Dragonlance Chronicals and Legends). I grew up being read to every night and now love falling asleep to audio books on CD. I have all 10 of the David Eddings books as well as all 7 of the J.K. Rowling books on CD and the FI and I turn them on as we're getting ready to fall asleep. It usually takes 15 minutes and I'm out! We also love to listen to books on the drive to our backpacking trips. We usually have to spend 4+ hours in the car to get to the trail head and it makes the time fly!

Sounds like the hard part is done. Now just enjoy the rest. Congratulations and welcome!

Yesterday (Fruit only day) was fine. I wasn't hungry or tired or crabby. Today is veggie only day and I'm hungry and craving sweets. I'm at work and it's slow so I'm just sitting here trying not to grab something awful. And then tomorrow is "customer appreciation day" at BOTH of my offices with cookies and cake *sigh*. Usually I can pack up and go to my other desk when they do that but both locations are doing it. I hope I can make it through.....I haven't checked the scale to see if I've gotten anywhere yet so maybe I'll do that this evening and see if it helps me stay motivated tomorrow. I am looking forward to my baked potato tonight. What veggies are you all using? I'm going to try some things I haven't had in years like beets and eggplant. It's kind of fun!

I am booking with Misha. I liked Stacey as well and she was really quick with responses but when I looked at a couple of complete weddings she had done and compared them to complete weddings Misha had done there was a certain emotion I saw captured by Misha in more of the pictures than in Stacey's. (It's easy to pick out highlights from a bunch of weddings but I was more interested in seeing all the pictures from one wedding, I think it better represents what I can expect to get). Don't get me wrong, Stacey has amazing pictures too. I didn't know about Brian until after I booked so I haven't really looked at his work. I did ask him for a price list for a next day TTD session and he never returned my email.... I'm sure you'll be happy with any of them. Good luck!

Kitty Prozac. Seriously. My male cat went through this stage when he was about 2 years old. He was very aggressive to the point of doing harm with my older female cats. So we (with the advice and care of our vet) put him on prozac for a while. It worked great, it's really cheap, like $10 a month and after a while we were able to take him off and everything is fine.