Having a reception was really important to me, so I decided to have one. But, if it's not important to you I think you can do whatever you want on this one. It's your day and if you want to skip it, go for it!
I would say $50 is a good amount to give as a gift. I'm sure she appreciates all you've done to be in the wedding and would appreciate any gift that you gave.
Hi Lisa - Congrats and welcome to the forum! Just do a search on the resort you are interested in and you should find a ton of helpful info.
Happy planning,
Jen