SoonToBeE

You're right - that is total BS. But I like that you are taking the high road and telling her how much she means to you. It sounds like she doesn't feel appreciated and by telling her that she is important to you. Hopefully you guys get to talk and you can find out what the root cause is. If she does mean alot to you and you do want to keep her as a close friend you both need to be respectful and sensitive with such a delicate situation. She is being inconsiderate and careless without a doubt, but hopefully you can talk through it. It's not worth losing a friend over because she doesn't want to be in the wedding party. You could also see if she wants to be involved in the wedding in another way? Instead of having her as an attendant you could have her play a special part in the day (if you think she would still want that) Also...if she is still coming you don't want to make it too awkward....she may forfeit her deposit if things get too bad, which would suck for both of you. Good luck with this...it's an emotionally charged situation that will need some careful maneuvering

Quote: Originally Posted by sunsetbride1 All I can add is that I agree with what everyone else is sayng! You are not alone with the responses you were getting. Heck, my sister took it personally and thought that I planned a DW just to exclude her and show everyone that she doesn't have as much $$ as I do so she can't go. So, hang in there and finish planning YOUR dream wedding!!!! We are having our dream wedding, so now whenever I talk to those people I tell them that we are so happy we planned the wedding this way - hopefully that way they realise it was about US not them. It's crazy that your sister thought you were planning your wedding a certain way just to spite her. It really makes you wonder what people actually think of you if you are resentfully planning your wedding so that it hurts them! Anyways, I'm happy now, but just annoyed last week after a comment....was the comment that broke the back, but I'm with Duchess....I am starting not to care what other people want. Which I think makes the wedding planning easier. It's our damn wedding! : P

Quote: Originally Posted by Tracy_S I chose to go with the Silver wedding package cause it included a cake which I will probably upgrade anyways, the bouquet and the grooms boutonnier and the champange. Also I didn't know or think that I would have enough people to book at allow for the free wedding and didn't need the swim up room either.. Also my FI's sister used the free wedding at her wedding in the DR a few years ago and wished she hadn't.. she would have liked to customize it more so that helped in making my decision as well... Tracy - Have you done research on cakes in Mexico? I know it's not a strength of theirs (kind of like food in Cuba ; ), I was reading the 'what I would do and what I wouldn't do again' thread and so many brides mentioned that they wouldn't do the cake. Just want to make sure you have expectations that are correct - it won't be like a cake you would get here.....

Quote: Originally Posted by edssbride09 You have to tell me where are you getting quoted for $11/pp set course menu for a private beach reception? Seriously, i need to know! I am using their event menu, and we are looking at paying around $75.00/pp for the meal even though everyone is at the resort... i am desperate to know what this is all about! The 11 menu is off of the set course menu - they're at the back of the booklet (start on page 26) They just raised these prices as well by a few dollars, but here is the up to date menu from the Karisma site: http://www.karismahotels.com/wedding...t-kit-2009.pdf The set course menus look good, but at the 11 range you only have an either 'or' choice, you can't get chicken or pork. So we're thinking about upgrading to the 33. In addition - if you are getting the free wedding package with the dinner in Arifices (sp?) included you can still use that large restaurant dinner for another vent (rehearsal dinner, welcome dinner, etc). We're having our welcome dinner once everyone arrives and then are having the private reception outside. We're making the welcome dinner optional, but we think people will like the chance to get together....or they'll be angry to lose another night in paradise ; ) Good luck!

Quote: Originally Posted by Tracy_S So for your photography do you still get it at the price originally quoted to you?? As the package that I want with Mexican Wedding Photos went up to and Marlet I think it was at the Photos emailed me back and said they would honor the original price I was quoted and to just tell Valeria that this was the case. I like working with her as well.. she has always responded to my emails within a day or 2 of me sending them and seems to be on top of things. I haven't checked if she will be there on the day of my wedding yet, but I will check now!!! lol Sorry for the delay in responding. I was having some issues with the forum! Anyway - they will honour the price, but I cannot believe how insanely high the photo prices are. They more than doubled and I felt they were high to begin with!!! I hate Karisma....grrr... As for Valeria - she will not be your onsite person and you won't be able to meet her - she is is Cancun as well.

Agreed - can you send me the same info as Jess : ) Thanks!

yeahhhhhhhhh

Quote: Originally Posted by missdanelle Jen you are definately not alone! Its so easy to get discouraged when all you hear are negative responses from people; especially coming from the ones that you love the most. I dont know why poeple insist on making everything about them is so annoying. Ive come to the point that whenever someone says something negative about our DW i just tell them "this is what we decided to do for OUR wedding". Im sorry that you are having to deal with this as well.. Thanks D : ) We have started saying that too. Feels so good to get past feeling guilty to get to being happy (even though sometimes I come back to being fruistrated). I'm wondering if people's feelings will rise up again before the day, or whether people will have come to terms with it by then...? Also....I'm so excited about your invites! I'm working on finishing touches with the designs tonight and tomorrow night and I'll have 5-7 ready to send to you to evaluate. Whee!

Quote: Originally Posted by luvtoteachlaw It is amazing to me how many people feel "entitled" to see you get married! As if you owe it to them or something. And the guilt trips can be tremendous. I have experienced this with both sides of family, although my immediate family is very very excited to go. Their excitement helps me disregard all those people who bitch and moan about us expecting them to use their vacation time to come to our wedding. Well, if we are important to them, they will come. If not, that is their choice. I think it comes down to priorities. Thanks for all the help ladies! I fully agree that people feel entitled to come to your wedding! I had no idea that people would feel this way until I saw it in action. I guess the hardest part about having people so angry is that we're not angry that they are not coming. We understand what we are asking. They should understand that too! Oh well..... We are so excited about the guests that are coming, with the exception of a few key players (mom, grandma, some aunts and cousins) everyone is there that we would want there. So we are so happy and feel so blessed. As for my dad walking me down the aisle.....I know I can't 'not' have him do that. He is so looking forward to it and I know I would regret it. But the part of me that is angry wants to do this on my own, just like everything else. But in the end we would both lose, and that would be too sad. We were thinking about doing a vow renewal when we got back, or legally get married at City Hall when we got back. Has anyone thought about doing that? Do you think your DW guests would feel cheated that they didn't get to see the real 'legal' wedding? Any suggestions? Thanks again - as bad as it sounds it's good to hear that everyone is in the same boat and that we're not having a disaster wedding : )

Okay...I'm sure everyone has been here, and I am sure there is another post out there on this....but I'm too annoyed to look. Since we announced that we were having a destination wedding we have had many different responses from 'that's amazing' to ' I can't believe you are doing this to spite us'. It's annoying because we are so relaxed about the wedding but so many other people are stressed about it. Some fun tidbits: The day my dad got his invitation he has is wife (my step mom) call me to tell me they couldn't come. This after I spoke to him on several occasions regarding the date, price, timing etc. I even called him the night before to confirm that everything was good for him and he assured me that he wouldn't miss it for the world. After many tearful phone calls and pleading emails he's coming.....but now I don't want him to walk me down the aisle. We have been accosted by several family members have told us that they don't understand or like that we are having a DW. Other members of the family are openly gossiping about how rude we are to 'expect' (their words) people to spend all this money to come to our wedding. A friend repeatedly expressed his outrage that we scheduled the ceremony mid week so it made it harder for them to come. We moved the date to a Thursday so they could make it a long weekend trip. They RSVP'd no. So....I guess no wedding is complete without negativity and being let down by family. We have had so MANY wonderful responses, but the negative ones add up so much because people are soooooo passionate about being negative towards the DW. Anyone else experience any crazy anger associated with their DW planning. I feel like I am in crazy town when people act like this. This is not normal!! phew.....breathe..... okay, now I feel better.

Congrats! I'm going for my first fitting tomorrow.....it's starting to feel real. Real Scary! And so excited. I actually got butterflies the other day thinking about marrying my FI. I still have to finalise the reception details with the resort and then have to finalise all decorations. I'm creating a lot of the paper pieces for the wedding, so lots of design work to do!

Is the dress still available? I'm interested : )

Quote: Originally Posted by BachataBride I am a HUGE fan of Vistaprint!! http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/t29462 And for all my fellow Canadians I would suggest using the ".com" as opposed to the ".ca" vistaprint as the prices are cheaper!! But that was a few months ago, so you might want to double check! The .ca and .com sites are now the same. Also. I LOVE Vista print! We made custom labels for our thank you cards with little characters of us. They're great! Here is my little spiel on the custom labels. Love them : ) http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/t34348

Haha - I love that we were on at the same time! I'm actually in Toronto which is closer to NY than Seattle. I love Vancouver though! Have some Canadian friends out there? Also - price is still out of range. Looking for a TTD dress and so only want to spend ~$100 because I only spent around $700 for my 'real' dress. I just couldn't spend more on my second dress. I think my FI would kill me! Good luck though : )

oh and good luck. Guess I could have just said that all at once. Oopps!

Nevermind. I clicked on the link. Out of my range...booo!

How much are you looking for it? I am looking for a dress.....

Ohh love it...and it's the right size...only not the right price : (

I LOVE Etsy - I got my flower off of there and I am in love with it., The buyers are so amazing and make the process really enjoyable and real. Hope you found your flower. I found mine there and love it: Etsy :: DimeStorePretty :: Large White Silk Magnolia Rose - Vintage Inspired Hair Pin Here is another orchid...Etsy :: BellaDemise :: Beautiful white and yellow orchid hair clip. Now you have me rethinking my magnolia and looking at orchids! Shame on you : P

I feel guilty that I came back to read it again because I love the story. I'd love to see what his version of the story would be in his words. I love when people do that - so many great stories on here!

that's a scale? good to know!

Since your dress is ivory I think you want ivory - otherwsie you'll look 'off' beside each other in photos. Not by much, but it's nice to look close. Also, ivory will look less dirty by the end of the day (with sand everywhere) than a diamond white. It doesn't hide much, but a bit of grime will be hidden!

Oh shoot...I was supposed to do this today! (If only there were other threads that would remind me of other things I forgot to do.....like "buy milk", "call back your sister", "stop biting your nails and stand up straight") *lol* Anyways, we plan to insure with our homeowners plan, I just ordered our wedding bands - did you put those on there as well?

Okay, I wouldn't say that my proposal was perfect and what you would see in a traditional romcom....but it was perfect and makes me laugh every time I think about it. We have been dating forever.....had just hit 8 years a few months before the proposal. We had talked about getting married, we had shopped for rings, we had looked at rings online, I had pestered him (I'm not proud of it!)...so I wasn't 'really' surprised when it happened, but the it happened was so sweet. We headed up to the cottage (cabin/ summer place/ whatever you want to call a second summer vacation property : P) for the Victoria Day Long Weekend (May 24 in Canada~). This is our favourite place on earth and secretly where I hoped he would propose. We always spend a week up there every year making fabulous dinners, relaxing by the fire, hanging out together and relaxing. A day into our long weekend we made an amazing dinner together (basically our favourite dinner, complete with amazing wine and great conversation) and then headed outside to hang out by the fire. We spent a while talking and when there was a lull in the conversation he stopped...dug into his pocket and said "well...umm...I guess...HERE!" and shoved the ring into my hands as though it was covered in burning hot magma. After asking him a few times what he had given me (even though I knew), and getting no response, I opened the box. In it was a beautiful engagement ring..... I looked up. He was crying...I was crying. But still he said NOTHING. I said a few things. He said nothing. He hugged me and kissed me. 'You still haven't asked me properly!' I said, laughing through tears. So...he got down on one knee, threw his arms wide and yelled 'Jennifer Smith will you marry me'. So cute. Afterward he said he froze...he wanted the proposal to be perfect and, after carrying the ring around in his pocket for 2 days, the ring was burning a hole in his pocket. He had to get rid of it! (Hence the ring shove and ensuing panic). It's cute that after all this time he was still nervous. So, I know this isn't the perfect proposal, but to me it was perfect because it was real. It was sweet and it was funny. And it still makes me laugh, and it doesn't make everyone around me nauseous when I tell the story

I have to say, it's fun looking at everyone's posts when they are lamenting being a NOOBS and now beside their name it says VIP member, Senior member etc. Fun : ) Is it sad that I aspire to become a VIP member.... Is it sadder that I bough coconut deodorant so that I could smell like beachy suntan lotion all day long? I've never look so forward to sweating : P lol.