DGG

Thank you all for the good advice and helping me put it into perspective..

I guess you are all right... It would be so awkward having her there sitting with my dad, sibs, and mom. But - maybe it is easier to avoid family drama and just have us there.. the only problem is my parents already know about it, so now I think we have to include them. But I guess I should be the bigger person and if we include any family, include her too.. I hate it when I'm wrong

I guess we should put "together with their parents" after our names just so they are included somehow - like you said Betsy, even though we are paying for the wedding, they have been supportive of us in other ways.. But my other question, my FI's mother passed away years ago - it is still correct to write "together with their parents" right

We are trying to figure out wording for our invites - for all of you that paid for the wedding yourselves, did you include your parents names on the invites? Or 'together with parents'. Since we are paying for the wedding and we both have been out of our family's homes for over 10 years - is it correct etiquette to leave our parents out or should we just include them so no feelings are hurt Just wondering how other ppl handled this...

Quote: Originally Posted by Dianna I changed mine when I got married, but kept my maiden name for my photography business. That's what I was thinking of doing - keep my name professionally but take his name for everything else.. but then do you get into trouble with your SS card or working under a different name??

me too - it's been driving me crazy I thought it was my connection..

Now you all have me feeling guilty So here is some of the backstory - maybe it doesn't change anything, I don't know.. but for their wedding, my dad had said he wanted my sister and I to wear matching dresses.. and then in front of us, she said no we were not her bridesmaids. He then had us each do a reading, so we were included - but she made it pretty clear that she didn't want us to be a part of the day. Then, about a year ago, she suddenly decided that it was "immoral" for my FI and I to stay in the same room when we are visiting (now, we have been dating for over 9 years, living together for 5-6 years) - we had always stayed in the same room in my dad's house at least since my parents were divorced so we were really hurt. I spoke to my dad and he said please just go along with it so she doesn't get mad.. Now I know her and my father took a vacation together for a week to Mexico before they were married and she is not religious at all, so there is no reason for her to say that.. I told my father how upset we were and that she is ruining FI and my relationship with her. My sister told me she overheard him saying that to her and she said she doesn't care if that's how I feel, it's her decision. Granted maybe my dad should have made the decision on his own, but my FI and I left early that trip - and nothing more was said about it. I'm superficially friendly to her, but still really hurt. Given all of this, having her there and including her in my immediate family only private church event really makes me uncomfortable almost to the point of not wanting any of my family there. My parents were married 25 years and have 4 children together - having her there is a disrespect to my mother even aside from my feelings. Yes, she is my father's wife and I respect her for that, but she is not my mother or even really my stepmother - so I don't consider her MY immediate family. Maybe you'll all still think I'm being spiteful but it is my one wedding day and I am including her in our regular wedding events, but I just don't want her there for this one thing... Sorry I think I just needed to vent

If anyone is looking to do magnet STDs, I definitely recommend a giftful heart. They were so helpful, rushed my order for me and really worked to help get it to me faster - and the magnets look great! I've gotten nothing but positive feedback from our family/friends. We also got one of their announcement cards to include details for reserving hotel/flights b/c we sent it out late - and they looked so professional also.. They have tons of designs and some really nice beach ones... just thought I'd help if anyone was unsure who to use

We are getting married in the Bahamas on the beach.. but my FI was upset when we realized we couldn't have a roman catholic priest (our religion) do our ceremony - so the compromise in the end, we are having our beach ceremony with all 50-60 of our guests at 5pm (then reception as planned) and a "secret" church ceremony that morning. We aren't going to tell anyone about it except our immediate family - because we still want the beach ceremony and everything else as we had planned. So, for our "secret" church ceremony, we were only going to have immediate family - which is my father and mother (who are divorced), 3 sibs, and FIs father (his mother passed away years ago) and his 2 sibs. We really wanted to keep it as small as possible and were considering just having our parents but decided to include our siblings as well. So - my issue - is my father remarried 2 years ago and neither myself or my FI really like his new wife. She has done several things that have really bothered me over the last 2 years and did nothing to include us my sister or I in their wedding. I really don't want her to be there for several reasons - including the fact that I don't like her, don't really know her all that well, and with my FIs mother not being there, having my mom and her sort of seems even more inappropriate. I told my dad this and he is really upset - he said it isn't right if his wife isn't there with him. I told him this is for only our immediate family and my MOH (my BF) isn't going to be there and noone else is going to be there - so I don't feel comfortable having her there.. Sorry this got so long - but I could use some feedback if I am being unreasonable or ways to explain to my dad that I'm not comfortable with having her there...

I already bought my regular dress, which I love also - but I really wanted a big poofy dress like this and originally thought it'd be too much for the beach... my other dress was actually reasonably priced so in my head, that justifies another dress for my TTD And I love TTD pictures with brides in big poofy dresses..

Bridal Gowns Informal bridal bridesmaids Prom Flower Girl Quinceanera Stores Please let me know if this dress is too much for a TTD?? I really want a big poofy dress for TTD and love the pickups, but I don't know if it's too much for TTD or not..

Thanks for the link- that really is a good deal for underwater cameras. I just ordered them for my OOT bags

Not to scare you, but I'd recommend trying to get emla or another numbing cream (with lidocaine) - a lot of waxing places have it or I think you can get it at a drug store also.. I have a very low pain tolerance, but I find it so much easier if I use a numbing cream.

you can use hydrocortisone ointment on your ears when you have a reaction - it sounds like an allergic reaction so this will bring down the swelling/redness -

So, chuppa is actually for Jewish weddings - it has to have 4 posts and a cover for Jewish weddings - but it does look nice on the beach which is probably why so many other people use it... I wanted something simpler but nice - the one I think I'm going to have is an arch draped with white linen and flowers only at the top. If you want to check it out, here's the link Celebrate your dream beach wedding at Old Bahama Bay by Ginn sur Mer ? Luxury Villa Rentals in the Bahamas it's picture number 4.. It's exactly what I was looking for..

Hi, there don't seem to be many of us here - but hopefully a few to answer my question I was told that all of the florists in the Bahamas import all of their flowers, which seems crazy to me.. There are such beautiful flowers there, but I was told none of them work well in bouquets.. Has anyone gotten their flowers done or ordered their flowers yet for a wedding in the Bahamas - is this really the case Now that I see how expensive flowers are, I finally understand why so many girls here are getting silk flowers..

It's already booked so we are stuck with this place - although I still think we'll be happy with it in the end (even if we're broke ). But - I left her a message saying I was very upset about it and was told we would be able to choose our tasting menu and that we are not going to pay extra money to taste the food we are going to order for our guests.. I haven't heard back yet, so we'll see

We're not having a AHR and fine with it.. It seems to me like planning a AHR would be almost like planning another wedding and this is way more exhausting and stressful than I thought.. plus, our wedding is already way over budget as it is.. We are inviting almost 90 people to our destination wedding, so that is everyone we really care about as it is.. There are a few friends we want to be there that can't make it, but that'd happen at any wedding...

I also want to hear what the ones DanaC ordered look like I ordered the cheaptotes ones (69cents) in lilac, aqua, and dark blue.. the lilac and dark blue look really cheap but the aqua one looks a lot better.. but they are really thin - but if you are looking to save money it's a good option - I'd recommend choosing aqua though..

Anyone else getting married from Old Bahama Bay? Or on Grand Bahama Island?? It seems like there aren't much of us here...

Quote: Originally Posted by Bridget810 I am not changing my name, and it is not for vanity reasons (though I would totally use that as an excuse if I could!!), as my fiance has a lovely last name. I let him know from the beginning that I had full intentions of keeping my name. While he was upset at first, I just said: "how would you feel if you lived as Mr. XX XXXX for 28 years, and established your identity, and then you married and had to change your name--and your identity? Would you do it?" He admitted that he would not like it one bit! Then I explained my feminist (no--not a bad word!) ideology--that women were just expected to do so. I'm not saying it's wrong to change your name; I'm just saying that it should be a choice. And, personally, I like my name. I have agreed, however, to consider hyphenating my last name when we have kids, to avoid confusion. Once you explain why you want to keep your name, I find that most guys are pretty agreeable. If not; well, that's a whole other issue! Good luck to you (and Girl Power!!!). Well said! I spoke to him more about it (and used your question - thanks ) and he said it really is okay and seems a lot better about it. I told him I would reconsider changing my name (except for professionally b/c all of my diplomas and licenses are under my last name) when we have children - and he said he's fine with that.. I think guys don't realize how much this means to a lot of women.. Thanks for sharing your opinions on this

I just got an email from my wedding planner - we are setting up things for our site visit next week and are going to do a tasting of food for our reception. The form she sent me is of a set tasting menu and the price is $75 per person with a 20% required gratuity. I am so upset they are adding on this cost - doesn't it seem ridiculous that we have to pay so much extra just to taste the food that we are going to be spending a lot of money on for our guests? And isn't the whole point of the tasting to choose the foods we want to order, not for a set menu?? Maybe I'm overreacting but they keep adding on these fees - we signed a contract already and already made a huge deposit but I'm starting to regret choosing this place. And this site visit alone is costing us almost $2000 including flight...

Quote: Originally Posted by Erika J It is a tough call. Recently, I had to sit down a dear friend and ask him not to bring a girlfriend so we could invite more of our close friends since our budget is so tight and we can only have so many people. He was really understanding and I think he appreciated me brining up sooner than later. Not to mention it was a huge weight off my chest. So I read your post and decided to talk to my friend who 'announced' her sister was coming with her - even though, we have another mutual friend who is single and not bringing a guest - so it would make more sense for them to room together - I was so nervous about upsetting her - then as soon as I brought it up, she said she forgot to tell me her sister can't come now.. huge weight off my shoulders - and I don't look like the bad guy

So, this isn't specific for destination weddings - but it's been something I've been trying to figure out.. I always thought I would not change my name. Although I don't really care what people call me socially, I wouldn't want to change it professionally or legally.. BUT - now my fiance tells me he is not happy with that. We have been dating for over 9 years and not that we spoke about it much, but I had always said I didn't plan to change my name.. and he never said anything about it... but now that the wedding is getting closer he seems upset about it.. I want him to be happy and I want to be a family with him and be part of his family, but I just don't see why I have to give up my name to do that... A lot of my friends kept their names, but I was wondering what the consensus was here..