lizzie287

I feel your pain. I just had a baby 4 months ago and am also the heaviest I've ever been. A couple other moms and I have been walking together and things like that lately, but the weight just doesn't wanna come off! lol. If anyone has any suggestions on how to lose 70 lbs in a year, I'm open to it lol.

So I'm not sure if this is where this should go, but oh welll .... I was engaged before, long story short we broke up (obviously) and now I'm across the country and infinitely happier with my new fiance. Anyway, my mom's friend was going to by my MOH in my first attempt at a wedding, which I did because I wanted to make my mom happy. She was ok, but she has way too much time on her hands and was constantly sending me links to tips to try and save money. Fine. But then when I started shopping around for ideas for bridesmaids dresses, she insisted that she didn't want to wear what everyone else had agreed upon and that she wanted to wear a different colour and choose her own dress. I agreed to a slightly different colour ("antique lilac" while the other girls were in lilac) but I still wanted her in the same dress. She even went as far as to refuse to go shopping with me when I was in town because "I'm not buying my dress yet". Well, I wasn't asking you too, I just wanted you to see what I'd like you to wear. Anyway, now that we're having a destination wedding, my fiance and I initially weren't going to bother even having friends at the wedding, but then he decided it would mean a lot to him to have his best friend there standing up with him. So my question here is, am I obligated to have the same person as my MOH because I asked her in the first engagement? Because I'd really rather have my best friend do it lol.

beautiful pics!

Aw thanks again ladies. It's so validating reading these posts. I was worried somehow I was being selfish in thinking that, you know, if it were MY daughter, I'd can one of the cruises and go to her wedding ... but that's just me ... lol ... Luckily, you're right, my mom can, and WILL, walk me down the aisle. That's actually the second thing she said (after shrieking vulgarities lol), is screw him, I'll walk you down the aisle.

Thanks! That's whatI thought too!

Thanks for your input ladies, I'm shocked at how quick I got responses! There was a question as to whether it would make me feel better to confront him about it .. honestly, no. I've confronted him about several things over the years, all of which involved his wife coming before me, and I've never won the argument. So really, at this point, I'm thinking this takes the cake and I think I'm finally ready to admit to myself what I've known all along - my father never wanted kids and just did what he felt forced to do. Now that I'm an adult, he feels his role as Dad has been completed. I really noticed this once I finished school - he paid my tuition and gave me grief over it constantly for the full 4 years. Once I was done, the emails stopped and all of a sudden it takes a month to get a very quick reply. It feels terrible knowing that anything is more important than his daughter, and frankly I feel like he's being very selfish. If he didn't want kids, he should have said so BEFORE he and my mom divorced, so now I feel like he made his bed, he can lay in it, he's just not man enough to do it. The biggest thing that goes through my head is thank Christ my daughter has a great father, and I'm so glad the old adage that women look for husbands like their father is the furthest from the truth in my case. To all of you ladies in similar situations, I feel for you as well and hope everything works out in your cases. For me, I know no amount of crying will bring my father to my wedding.

So I'm relatively new to the forum, but I just was confronted with an unexpected ... umm .. twist .... to the planning of my October 2009 wedding. When my fiance proposed, I informed everyone within 2 days of our plan to have an island wedding. Everyone said their congrats, I assumed all was well. I asked my dad and stepmother for their input regarding resorts because they travel AT LEAST twice per year. My stepmother has been in touch quite frequently, mostly pushing the fact that October is hurricane season, and that I should hold out for last minute deals. I've politely said my gut says October in the Dominican, so that's what we're doing, and I'm NOT going to leave a wedding to the last minute. All has been amicable though, and I've taken other suggestions of hers to heart. Yesterday I got the biggest shock yet: an email from my dad stating that they will not be able to attend because they already have 2 cruises booked. Ummm... pardon Apparently he's had these cruises booked for a year and a half already (coming from the same couple who wanted me to take advantage of last minute deals for my wedding) and they simply can't afford to come to that as well. To add insult to injury, he states he may or may not come to the reception, depending on when we decide to have it when we get back. As if that wasn't enough, he says "not to rain on your parade, but an island wedding can be very expensive" and that we should just get married at a courthouse at home and then just go on vacation... I'm flabbergasted that my own father doesn't want to be at my wedding. I'm an only child so it's not like he's going to have several chances to be at his kids' weddings or anything, not that that would be an excuse. My mom wants me to just not reply to the email and let him stew in his terrible decision... Knowing my dad, that really is the best way to approach it, because frankly, he just doesn't get it. It's not like I wanted him to walk me down the aisle or anything, we aren't really all that close, and frankly he's never really done anything to warrant that honour as far as I'm concerned. But still, I assumed that a year was plenty of notice for something like this, and that he would use this time as one of his vacations. I guess what I'm looking for is validation for my feelings. We aren't really close, but it's not like either of us has "disowned" the other or anything like that.

This is your wedding and it's your right to do whatever will make it your fairy tale. If she wants to b*tch she doesn't need to come. What's important is that you and your man are fulfilling your dream, not who is there.

How early do you need to send Save The Dates? I think it would be a really good idea to send them as well as invitations, I just don't know what the "rule" is there ... We are getting married October 2009. We've pretty much decided a week to be away, but I'm reluctant to guarantee is, just because, honestly, I've never booked a trip on my own so I don't know if anything can go wrong with the dates .... So being that it's 11 months away, is it too soon to send save the dates?

Quote: Originally Posted by Cattie Wow, I'd be a little ticked also. 25 days to respond is uncalled for. If they're taking that long to respond to an email, how long is it going to take for you to get your pictures back? I'm far from diplomatic, because, well I don't see that you did anything wrong either. I would say the hell with having them do an additional hour shoot for another time. Was it in your package? If so, ask the venue if there is a way to give you a credit due to the poor service you received from the photographer to use toward something else for your wedding day. If they took that long to get back to you, and are bitter because you went with someone else, what kind of job are they actually going to do for your shoot? If I'm looking to hire you, I feel that more then 3 days to get back to me is uncalled for. They are providing a service, they should be prompt, or at least somewhat timely. If they can't, well they should really take a look at there business. Not that I really helped, but I couldn't help but speak my mind! It was a rough night at work! I hope everything works out for you I agree 100% with this. Customer service is key, for me anyway, and if they can't get back to you within a reasonable amount of time (I'm a little harsh - 24 hours for me unless there's a reasonable reason) then forget it. I really don't think you have anything to apologize for, and I agree that if you're flying someone in, there's really no sense in using 2 photographers anyway.

How beautiful! I'm actually in tears. Congratulations, you sound so lucky, and so happy

I'm also curious about that. My stepmother suggested getting married by a justice of the peace in Canada and just having the ceremony in the Dominican, because having a foreign marriage certificate could potentially cause problems down the road. And of course I wondered, what problems It seems to me (though I haven't done a lot of research) that with a Mexican wedding I would definitely get married here first. Now if you were to do that, do you get the bypass all the bloodtests and residency requirements that they have and just get on with the wedding? And (el cheapo here) do you save anything on a wedding package that includes legalization of documents, etc.?

yes it is.

Iberostar Hacienda Dominicus is my first choice as of right now as well, looking for reviews on weddings specifically

That's pretty much exactly what my train of thought was. Thanks so much ladies