If you want one, then let her do all the dirty work and planning. If you dont want one, just say "thanks, but no thanks."
I let my family, MoH know that, in no uncertain terms that there will be no shower for me - unless it resembles more of a BBQ/co-ed drinking party. However, my FI's brother's girlfriend, who Im sure is my FMIL's secret agent and drives me crazy asked the other day if I would allow a shower and of course I said no. His side of the family is crazy - hehe.
Bottom line - do what you want, not what other people want or think you should do.