To answer most of it................The dinner is typically used as either your wedding dinner or possibly a rehearsal dinner. It is not a private event, although you can choose to pay for one. Then they will give you a restaurant as well as the menu and you can choose one salad, one soup, two entrees and one dessert.......there were a few choices of each to pick from. Keep in mind there are other restaurants that you can choose from even tho they only offer you one! As for the set-up I was told they will kinda section off as best they can a portion of the restaurant to keep the group as close together as possible. The only answer I am not sure of is what happens if you go beyond the 40 person count. Hope this helps. I am getting married at EDR in October and am using the free dinner as a rehearsal/get together dinner the night before the wedding and then we are paying for a private cocktail party the night of the wedding.