Wow! This thread is awesome! Makes me feel sooo normal. Today has been one of those days, so forgive me....
Dear Renters,
When you send a one year lease you committed to paying me rent every month for 12 months. I'm glad to hear that you love the neighborhood and have decided to buy a place nearby. Honestly, that doesn't mean you get to stop paying rent. I leave out of state now - find someone new or continue sending the rent.
P.S. someone new = someone reliable that will be respectful to the property and the neighbors and someone that has a job.
P.P.S. water the lawn afterall I pay the fucking water bill
Dear colleagues,
Yes, I've only been there 5 months. Yes, I fired someone. Yes, someone else is quitting - does that mean you should dump more work on me - hell no. Get a grip. Also, just because I'm not into computer games and sports doesn't mean that you should pretend I don't exist. Yes, this is the first time i'm managing this many people. I'm going to make mistakes. I'm not perfect - get over it.
P.S. When you whine to my boss about me, I can hear. If you haven't noticed, she seems to be taking my side, so do us all a favor and SHUT UP.
Dear residents of San Jose,
Are there any normal, chill people living here? I'm ready for some friends that aren't hardcore video game players. How about a BBQ and a beer on Saturday?
Dear Mom & Dad,
I know you can't afford to help with the wedding. That's ok. We'll figure it out.
Dear FMIL & FFIL,
You just spent $40K on a new kitchen and $25K on your daughter's wedding. Now you're off to Europe for a month. Ever consider offering to help out a bit with our wedding? Just because we aren't doing a rehearsal dinner doesn't mean your off the hook. Oh, BTW, it's important to FI that his grandparents come - do you think you could actually talk to them and get them to come?
Dear Self,
Yes, you are out of shape. Get up in the morning and do something about it. Try walking the dog. You're running out of time - surgery is coming and then the wedding. Get moving.
To the dishes in the kitchen,
Can you please clean yourselves? FI will kill me if the kitchen is still a mess in the morning!
Thanks for listening! You guys rock!