While I am still trying to process this whole thing ... my last BM called me tonight during dinner and told me she isn't coming. I have 73 days left and she waited till now to tell me. I went from 4 now to 0!!! Some of ya know the story... but come on... she has been going through everything with me and up until a month ago everything was perfect and she told me that even though everyone else had backed out she was gonna be here for me, since my friends are my "family" and I don't have any real family joining us. It's been hard enough to go through the other backing out for all different reasons and my Sandals girls know what I have been chatting about, BUT her whole trip has been paid for since March!! Granted she took the ins so she will get it all back but 100 bucks for her and her husbands trip...
Through this whole process of finding out who is who in my life... and the strain of crying my eyes because everything felt like it was falling apart here is just something else to add to the mess I am going to call my wedding.
One thing I do know is that this day is about Jay and I which I can't wait for November to get here so we can have our "happy begining".. BUT WHOLLY CRAP when it rains it really does pour. My friends are my family and that is all I really have ... without having them to share our special day .. it makes me feel honestly ... loser - like?? This whole wedding will have all of Jays family (yes which is mine and has been from the get go) and his friends..
I'm not sorry for my rant ... cuz I needed to get this out ... but after a few glasses of wine I'm in a happy mood a peacefull place... LOL..... and CRAP is my favorite word since I really try not to swear around my 5 yr old... 8o)
So tomorrow when I give Ann my BL weigh in ... I will be at the bottom of the list with like 5lbs gained... YAY!!!!!!!