luvtoteachlaw

Hi - I am looking to purchase back issues of Martha Stewart Weddings. If anyone has any issues that they are willing to part with, please let me know. Thanks!

Thanks for the link! I already emailed and she responded by sending a price list. We are still deciding on location - either Bluefields (outside Negril) or a villa in the Discovery Bay area. The website said they are expanding to offer service in OR also, so I think I am ok no matter which location I choose.

For those of you who handled your own floral arrangements for the ceremony/reception, what flowers did you find most common and reasonable? I have a huge love of orchids, and I know that they are a local flower. How reasonable are the prices for orchids there? What other flowers were easy to locate? I am trying to figure out my color scheme, and what flowers will blend nicely with it. Thanks!!

My FH and I delicately mentioned this last Wednesday night to his family. They looked shocked, although FH told me he has always told them he wants a DW. So . . . younger brother (age 32 and unmarried) called my FH and wanted to "let him know the family concerns" regarding our wedding plans. First it was the classic guilt trip, "Now there are many people who love you who want to see you get married, and they won't be able to come" and "why aren't you getting married in a catholic church by a priest?" and on and on . . . My take = younger bro is jealous because he always expected to be married first (he always has had long term girlfriends, but never was close to getting married). My FH thinks this is true, too, unfortunately. This is hilarious in a way because my family, who are VERY traditional, are totally cool with the idea. In fact, my mom cried when I told her that I wanted a special intimate wedding with close family and friends. She thought the idea was special because the focus was on having our wedding with the people who mean the most to us and not on some big ridicuolous event that 200 people would attend. FH family is from NY and much more liberal in their viewpoints. Frankly, I think FH stepmom wants to be able to have all her friends to our wedding and knows that they will not get an invite. Best advice = keep focused on YOU and what YOU and FH want to do. It is a celebration of your love and commitment, not anyone else's. You never want to regret not doing what you want to do.

Quote: Originally Posted by CourtneyV Well, there are a few things to consider. First, if you don't want them there, then don't invite them!!! For us, it was important to have only the people that we were huge influences in our lives. Of couse family is important, but there are aunts and uncles I haven't spoken to in like 10+ years! We chose not to invite them. There's always the "it's close family and friends only". The thing with not inviting people (especially if they're family, whether you're close with them or not) is that they tend to feel offended. I know they don't really want to be there (and they know it too!), but it's the fact that they weren't even given the choice that seems to bother them. Depending on the family, some may start a little more hassle than it's worth - especially if they're not likely to come anyways. Ask yourself this: when you're standing up there and you look back on everyone watching on, how would you feel if you saw them there? If you do choose to invite them, then I'd suggest sending an STD to them as well. Again, if they find out that they got the invitation and not the STD, people tend to feel secondary - like they're the 'B' list that was added after x number of people said they couldn't make it! I know, it's dramatic and over the top, but people get weird when it comes to weddings. I'd say to whomever you choose to invite, send an STD as well. The reason I am trying to sort this out is because the people that I really am not keen on inviviting ARE dramatic and over the top. Long story short . . . I was engaged once before (8 years ago) and called off the wedding (best decision I ever made, but I digress . . .) but these family members had a coronary when I made the decision to have no children at the wedding (it was a 4 pm wedding with a late reception, after all). There was sooo much blaming and guilt-tripping and passive-aggressive behavior . . . they went so far as to tell me "Well, I guess we can't come if you don't allow us to bring our kids" and "I guess I will stay home and watch all the kids and everyone else can go to the wedding". Ugh. I guess I could use that as a reason why I didn't invite them this time! Afterall, if people are so ridiculous as to refuse to hire a sitter for their kids so they can attend a wedding, they aren't gonna board a plane without them, either.

So, I am sure this is a common problem - my FI thinks we need to send STD and invitations to everyone we would normally invite to our wedding. When I mentioned that I wasn't going to send out all these items any extended family because I am not really close to anyone, he was shocked. He is closer to his extended family and will be inviting all aunts/uncles and cousins. Thing is, if I was to do that, it would be like, 20 extra invites = 40 people additional. Now, I can pretty much expect that if I was to invite all these people, only one uncle and aunt would have the financial resources to attend. His extended family is in a better financial state than mine and it is likely that at least 1/2 of those invited would attend. I have more friends with spouses that I would like to attend instead of inviting extended family that I am not close to. The question is . . . do I send out invitations to them, but not STD? I mean, I guess it is important to let everyone in the family know that I am getting married (they all thought I might not since it took me to age 35 to find my man). However, I really don't want these people at the wedding. This is a conversation topic now because I found some DIY STD and invitations, and I want to make sure I get enough. Also, we are trying to plan for all guests to stay in a villa near the one we are renting for the family (and where we will hope to hold the ceremony and reception), and we need to have some idea of a limit for planning purposes. Any thoughts on this? Thanks in advance for all your help!

Quote: Originally Posted by jmhein The transfers from Montego Bay to Ocho Rios are No Problem these days Mon! The highways have been completely re-done, they are smooth, paved, and better than a lot of roads I've seen in Canada and the US! Our bus travelled non-stop to the resort and we had no problems or delays, and just enjoyed looking at the scenery! Thanks for this info! How long would you say it took for the transfer?

A big thanks to all of you for your info on why you chose ROR. We are choosing Jamaica also due to the number of flights from JFK or ATL to Jamaica(my FI is a Delta airlines captain). Villas are also all-inclusive, so I am also committed to chosing an all-inclusive place. The only reasons why I haven't really considered checking into a resort hotel is because I wanted alot of privacy for the ceremony and reception, and didn't like the thought of some dude in a speedo that was way to small gawking at me or my guests When I think resort, I think huge amounts of people. I guess I am a person who is more private and normally I don't like to be in the spotlight, especially around people I don't know. Maybe I am just weird Also, I was concerned about arranging trasportation from Montego Bay airport the whole way to Ochos Rios. What is the real deal with respect to how long it takes to get there? I have heard horror stories about hours and hours on the road. Thanks for all your advice and help with this - my FI and I need to book our hotel for the site visit trip and this info is very helpful to us!!

We are making a site visit in a month to Jamaica and are trying to decide our itinerary as well as a place to stay during our time there. While I am pretty set on finding a villa for the wedding, I have to ask why so many here are going to ROR? I haven't checked into it yet, so there may be some fabulous deal that I haven't yet discovered. Can you give me the straight scoop on the ROR wedding deal? If there is something to investigate at ROR, we might stay there during our upcoming site visit. Thanks in advance for your help!

True Companion by Marc Cohn - first dance Landslide by Stevie Nicks/Fleetwood Mac - father/daughter dance

Quote: Originally Posted by Princess402 Found it! Here's where I got the idea: http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/t3311 Thanks so much for tracking this down!

Quote: Originally Posted by Hartyt509 I think its difficult to get the balance right. My mum died 8 years ago from kidney failure and I have very little family left most have died. My dad lives on the otherside of the world and won't be able to make it and in truth he would be miserable because it just isn't his thing. We were going to get married in Bali where dad lives but FMIL is a PITA and I ddin't want dad to have to deal with her lol FI's step dad (whom he considers to be his real dad) died just over 2 years ago from cancer and this delightful mother shacked up with someone else shit hot and has just married him! so under sufferance he is coming to the wedding! (massive fights about that lol) FI has said he doesn't want to do anything to remember him because he is in his heart and will be there anyway. I've got a charm bracelet and i have 3 charms to signify my mum,dad and brother (who also died) and only 3 people know about that so I'm happy. I think you need to discuss it with him in depth - it might be it would really upset him. I know what you mean about the step mum tho - I've got a FMIL who tries to be my mum and i've hit the stage of "go screw yourself" lol I know that I am very lucky because my parents are both still here, and married to each other (for 37 years!!). I really try to put myself in Steve's shoes, but I know there is no way I can possibly know how it feels to watch your mother fight for her life for three years and then die in your living room at age 11. He doesn't have a hard time discussing it, and I thinking talking about her helps him feel that she is still present with him. However, he has stated specifically that every happy event in his life has always been tempered by feelings of sadness and loss because "the most important person isn't there". That is really why I want to do something special, and do something that makes him feel close to her, without putting the focus on loss. For me, it is hard too, although for different reasons. I know that for every special event that happens with us, like the birth of our children, will always have this "loss" component running in the background. Knowing this I want to keep the focus as positive as possible so he doesn't slide into "loss" mode. We have already talked in a general sense about doing something to remember her during the ceremony, but we didn't really mention anything specific. I think leaving an empty chair with flowers on it would cause him more upset because he would look out and see the empty seat and focus on that. Putting a charm on his boutineer, close to his heart, is something he would like because it doesn't signify emptiness, like the chair, I would signify the fact that she is right there with him on this special day.

Quote: Originally Posted by 1Love Walking down the aisle to 'The Wedding Song' by Frank McComb and our first dance will be to "At Last" by Etta James moving straight onto "At Last" by the Temptations (R&B version) - at this point the bridal party will join us and those guests who wish to join in will be encouraged to do so. I love At Last!! I like the live version done by Stevie Nicks: YouTube - Stevie Nicks ~At Last~

Quote: Originally Posted by JennyK Has anyone ever used TRUE COMPANION by Marc Cohen? It's one of the most beautiful wedding songs I've ever heard. My cousin just used it at his wedding so that nixxed it for me. Here's the link to it on YouTube. Unfortunately there's no video for it but someone put the song with the lyrics. YouTube - Marc Cohn - True Companion I agree!!! This is the song that I have wanted as my first dance ever since I first heard it back in 1991! I think it is perfect, and I am surprised that more people don't use it.

I plan on wearing all my Bare Escentuals makeup . . . it is the best makeup that I have EVER used! The foundation is consistently the #1 rated foundation in Allure magazine. It covers eveything, keeps oil under control, doesn't dry the skin and looks completely natural. The mineral veil is a finishing powder that provides an air brush finish and controls oil. There are so many beautiful eye colors to pick from, and they all blend nicely for a natural look. I really can't say enough about how much I like their products! Now is a great time to order . . . they are having a 10 year anniversary on QVC now. You can also find these products at Sephora. http://www.qvc.com/cgen/render.aspx?qp=class|1214&rewrite=no&level=2&walk. yah=6285-1214&cm_re=MH-_-BEAUTY-_-BAREESCENTUALS&cm_sp=MH-_-BEAUTY-_-BAREESCENTUALS

This is a site on ebay that I keep checking out: eBay Store - Your Dream Dress: Monique Lhuillier, Carolina Herrera, Amsale Their feedback is excellent, and I have corresponded with them about one of their dresses. It is amazing how much less some designer dresses can be sold for! They told me that if you purchase a dress, you can decide to send it back if you don't like it, and they will send any other dress that you might want to try out at no cost to you for shipping.

Quote: Originally Posted by Kryztan I think there is someone here that makes them Oh that would be fantastic! If someone can direct me to that person, I would be grateful. Would this be something to consult Steve on, or could I have it made and give it to him at the wedding? Knowing him, he would not object to having this done, and would really appreciate it. Are there any pitfalls that I am not seeing??

Quote: Originally Posted by Kat81 I hope this doesn't come across horrible and mean but I wouldn't care what stepmom thinks about it. I would have your dance and not do a mother son type dance. I have only been to a few weddings that actually did that anyway. As for remembering his mother I kind of like the idea of a mini picture of his mom maybe on your bouquet and his boutinere? Stepmom can get the heck over it. That is is mother and she is never going to change the fact that he loves and misses her very much. Oh, when it comes down to it, I really don't care if I upset the stepmom; the only concern there is how she would overract and upset Steve's dad. But I know I can't control her or her behavior, so I will just end of doing what I want anyway. One of the reasons on our list of why we want to do a destination wedding is so that she doesn't invite all her high maintenance friends to the wedding. If we got married here in the states, I can only imagine she would have a guest list of probably 100 people, including the vet and her manicurist!

Quote: Originally Posted by Princess402 I can relate to your situation. My FI lost his mom to cancer 10 years ago, just before we started dating. His dad was remarried six months later, but moved in with her and her family and left his kids in his old house to fend for themselves even earlier than that! Yeah, totally messed up. FI was only 16 with two younger brothers. And defintitely some issues with stepmother, although now we all "get along" too. FI is a pretty private person and doesn't talk about his mom much (I personally think because it is too upsetting) so I don't think that he will be the one pushing to remember his mom at our wedding, but I want to. Also, I lost my dad three years ago to cancer as well and I want to do something to remember him. I was thinking for us that I would have my dad's picture hanging on my bouquet and then I would put a pic of FI's mom in his front pocket or pinned to his boutineer (sp?) or something. I also really want to mention them both in my speech; thanking my mom and dad for giving me such a good example of love and making me who I am, and thanking FI's mom for raising such a wonderful son for me to have as my husband, or something like that. I want to remember them and pay tribute to them, but I also don't want to do too much and have it be another memorial service, you know? As for the dancing thing, personally I think we will scrap those first dances bc I won't have a dad there and he won't have a mom. Although maybe we could do him dancing with my mom and me dancing with his dad? I think if you and your dad want to have a special dance, maybe just do that and that's it? FI doesn't have to have a special dance with anyone if he doesn't want to. Then FI's stepmom won't be upset that FI danced with someone else or something like that. Besides, you're the bride, it's all about you anyways! Of course, if he feels like he should have a special first dance with someone then I do like the idea of maybe a grandmother or aunt that he is particularly close to. Good luck with this, I know these are such hard issues. Yes, these are hard issues, and I do understand the delicate balance of emotions in "overdoing it" . . . I like the idea of having a picture of his mom pinned to his boutineer; I have heard about charms being pinned to a bouquet. I saw a picture of one, but I am not sure of how to make one or where to purchase one. Any ideas??

Quote: Originally Posted by petunia Does he have a maternal grandmother with whom he could dance, instead? Yes, but she is 95 (and still drives!!!!), and I don't think she will be able to handle the travel to Jamaica. But, it is a good suggestion if she can make it!!

I have read a few of the threads that offer suggestions for remembering a deceased parent; howevever, I am not sure of how those suggestions would play out in my situation. My Fiancee's mom died after battling terminal cancer. She died one week before his 12th birthday. Even though it has been 25 years, it is still very difficult for him. He has said that every happy event in his life has been tempered by the fact that she isn't there to celebrate with him. So it is very important to do something to reccognize her during our special day. HOWEVER, Steve's dad remarried only one year after his mother passed away (can you say . . . issues!!). As you can imagine, stepmother is not exactly close to my fiancee, Steve. While they "get along" now, it is never easy when things about his mom pop up. Stepmom also has control issues. I certainly don't want to piss off stepmom, but I do want to do something special for Steve's mom. And there are traditions that I am unsure how to navigate with the given situation. For example, I do want to have a dance with my dad at the wedding, and I know that the groom usually dances with his mom around that same time. Well, that isn't gonna happen with stepmom. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to handle this kind of situation? It's a bit hard because I am not the one who has suffered the loss; he is the one who has suffered. I would like to make some suggestions to him, and would appreciate any things to pass on to him!

Thanks so much for this recommendation!! I think I am going to continue to correspond with her and customize a package and see if it can fit into my budget. Anyone else who has worked with her - I would love a bit more info on the photographer used by Tropical Weddings. Thanks in advance!

I just received a quote from Almarie as well. I picked one of the bigger packages, but know that I will not need all these items. Of those of you who have used Tropical Weddings, did anyone pick a specific package, or is it pretty much normal to have a package customized? My quote was for the : Royal Romance Package-$4250 Marriage Officiate to Perform Ceremony All Marriage License Fees Two Certified Marriage Certificate All Legal Processing of documents prior to wedding Bridal Roses Bouquet (fresh garden flowers hand tied) Maid of Honour Bouquet (Roses) Groom Boutonnière (Roses) Bestman Boutonnière 2 Bridesmaid Bouquet (Roses) 2 Groomsmen Boutonnière (Roses) 2 Mothers Corsage (Roses) 2 Fathers Boutonniere (Roses) 1 Flowergirl basket with Petals Rose Petals on White Aisle 1 Pair White Doves for Release at Ceremony Tropical Wedding Location of your choice Tropical Decorated Wedding Location Location Set-up for up to10 people Tropical Decorated Aisle Pedestals Create Aisle with Tulle & Roses 1 Flower Cake Top Arrangement Two Tier Wedding Cake Mini Reception after Ceremony (cake & champagne) Elaborate Hot & Cold Cocktail Hors'douvres (10pax) Two Bottles of Champagne for Toasting Decorated Table for Signing of Wedding Documents 72 Professional Developed Photograph with negatives 2 5X7 Wedding Portrait Photographs 2 8X10 Wedding Portrait Photograph Wedding Album DVD Videotape of Wedding & Reception Roundtrip Transportation from hotel/cruise ship to wedding site for Bestman/Maid of Honour & Couple Massage for Bride & Groom Makeup for Bride Hairstyling For Bride Tropical Weddings Souvenir Memento Music Accompaniment for Ceremony Personalized On-Site Wedding Coordinator All Taxes & Service Charges I was wondering if anyone has feedback on the photographer or videographer used with these packages, or if it is better to select your own. Also, did anyone use the hair/makeup option?? Also, if I do go with Tropical Weddings and Almarie, and I plan on staying at a villa, is it normal to make a site visit with her, or to just visit the site on my own when I make a visit to Jamaica in July? Any feedback on any of these items is much appreciated!!

Quote: Originally Posted by Jenn We briefly looked at villas, but thought that it may be cost prohibitive to our guests, and also weren't sure about everyone literally sharing rooms and bathrooms - just a privacy issue. Our guests didn't all know one another, so it may have been a bit awkward at first. If you are looking for a more intimate feel, check out Coral Cove, which is just outside of Negril - we were married there and it was absolutely perfect A little off the beaten path, but a very cool vibe, and they will do almost anything to make your day perfect! It has a bed and breakfast feel to it, and if you essentially rent the whole place (which we did) its like having a villa, but with everyone having a little more privacy. Jenn - thanks for this info! This looks like a great place . . . how many total guests did you have at the wedding and how long of a stay is required for guests at this property? Also, what kind of outside vendors did you need to secure for this location? This may be an option for us to stay at during our site visit next month, so it is helpful to get details on this first-hand!

From reading many posts in this forum, it does seem that many people have chosen to have their wedding handled by a resort. While I am not opposed to that option, my FI and I have thought that a fully staffed villa would be a very nice opportunity to have our closest family and friends together for a very private and elegant event. We are looking at a max of 30 people. I have a few preliminary questions: 1. Did anyone look at a villa as an option? Did you opt for the villa - why or why not? 2. Once you have settled on the location, did you use the coordinator at the location, if provided, or did you secure your own "outside" coordinator (like the one from Tropical Weddings)? 3. What types of things did you have accomplished prior to a site visit? Did you have a coordinator assist you with the site visit, or did you set up the site visits on your own with the villa manager or resort staff? We are looking to make a visit to Jamaica the third week in July and want to maximize our time there. Any suggestions are appreciated!!