Sapphire723

Oh, Good! That's some great news right there.

Wow... that's really awesome. Way to be hot enough to be an ad model! :-)

Kelly, I'm fine with that I'm excited to get with the fit. My clothes are beginning to get a little tight on me!

Haha, the binder clip is funny, but you look hot!

For the past two years, we've had my parents stay with us over Thanksgiving (they live about 650 miles away). Unfortunately because of my fiance's work, he can't travel for Thanksgiving or Christmas. Our first and second Christmas together, I flew out to see my parents and he stayed in town. This year, I stayed in town and celebrated with his family (WAY less stress! His family is amazing). Hopefully you guys can find a system that works for you.

It's awesome that you guys are all able to get married at St. Thomas. We had wanted to do that (our engagement cruise made a stop there and we loved it!), but we decided it wasn't our most cost efficient option. Enjoy!

Welcome to the forum! It's awesome that you decided to join. My fiance mostly hears second hand all of the helpful information on here. :-) You'll definitely be able to find some helpful stuff on here, and it's great that your TA is a champ.

Quote: Originally Posted by BC Bride2be Thanks Jen! I get what you are saying, but I have been there for her - for the past two years. I have had long conversations (many) about her life and where it is going, I have supported her 100+% and only hope for the same.. this time for once, its not about her and I wish she would see that, that’s all. Thanks again Ugh, I can see how annoying it would be, because it seems like you've been giving and giving to her. But I can also totally see how someone who has been recently divorced would not get super excited about a wedding, even one for someone who has been her personal cheerleader. I really hope that she perks up for you, but she might not have it in her to be the supportive sister we all think she should be. I think the best you can do is allow ways for her to be included without having expectations that she'll jump at the chance to do wedding-y things. This is a sucky situation, and I'm sorry that you have to deal with it.

Wow! That looks awesome. You're really creative, you know that?

You did an awesome job! How much did it cost you to DIY? How did you do it?

Thanks for the heads up. I'll check my Target ASAP. Do people still need them? I'll keep my eye out for extras.

Try talking to a Travel Agent about which resort to choose. Many specialize in Destination Weddings, and I'm sure there are some awesome ones out there who have experience for Sanibel Island. That being said, you could ask people to RSVP and then choose a resort, but that might be trouble. People might be anxious that they don't know where they're staying, plus they might think they'll be shelling out a certain amount of money for the trip, but might back out if they find out the price changed. It's probably a better idea to get a feel for how many you think might attend, and then choose a resort based on that ballpark figure. You might also want to consider renting a beach house or villa if there are some in that area. One or two of those might house all your guests and could be a cheap alternative to staying at a resort.

I would consider why your sister might not be super thrilled. Is it that she's not a wedding person? Do you think she may be jealous? Is she married but having a rough time with her relationship? She may have a personal problem that has nothing to do with you, but it's making her act out or try to avoid talking about your wedding. I would try talking to her, asking her if she's ok, and then let her know that you had hoped she would be able to share your excitement for your super awesome wedding. Just be careful how you word anything in an e-mail, letter, or voice mail. Think about how your sister might interpret what you're saying and try to avoid language that might give her the wrong impression or make her defensive. Overall, it's your wedding, and you should have people come that are excited for you, especially those for whom you are paying. You don't have to make her a witness, but you might not want to publicly announce that she isn't your witness because that might breed bad blood.

I agree with the people who say to give it a few days before you freak. USPS is sometimes slow with getting the numbers up there. Also, PayPal will get you your money back should your fiance be correct. I've had a problem before with buying something on ebay, and PayPal helped me resolve it.

You're totally not over-reacting. I'm really nervous about choosing a seamstress for my alterations. The last BM dress I had altered was a NIGHTMARE! After they altered, they had taken it in so much that I couldn't zip it up all the way (And I had lost weight since my fitting). They tried to tell me it was ok that I couldn't breathe. I had it re-altered twice, and it still wasn't right (but I didn't have anymore time before the wedding). I almost passed out during the ceremony because I couldn't breathe!!!

Quote: Originally Posted by luvtoteachlaw I also always try to hold on to hope that situations can get better, but frankly, I don't think it is going to happen here. I will never understand why people do such things and make it miserable for everyone. I don't understand either. I don't know what traumatic event happened to her that made her think that that was ok. Go ahead and leave her out of the planning and all extras. If she says something about it, I would clearly tell her that it is because of the way she treats you and your fiance. If she isn't going to be nice, she isn't going to be included. End of story. I can only imagine what is going through her head. She must feel that because nobody likes her anyway, she can go ahead and do as she pleases with no regard for anyone else. I would also talk to her daughter to let her know that she is important to you no matter what her mother is saying. Talk to her about any concerns she may be having, and if she actually does have a problem, see if you can work it out with her. I'm sure that she knows her mom well enough to know that what she's being told isn't true or the whole story, but it's probably a good idea to clear the air with her.

Do you guys want to continue to have her in your life? What would happen to your dynamic with the rest of the family if she was cut out? I would weigh these options and decide what is really important to you. She seems like she doesn't want you to be truly happy and that's not a good kind of energy to have near you. Explain to everyone involved that you're not going to allow negative energy to bring you down. If she's going to be horrid towards you, don't include her. If other people object to that, explain to them that although you care for your step-monster-in-law, her abusive behavior is not ok and if she's unwilling to be nice the only course of action you have is to separate yourself from her. Reasonable people will understand and support you. Everyone else can feel free to jump off a cliff ;-) Seriously, you have enough BS going on. If it's not important to your fiance to maintain a good relationship with this woman, then go ahead and cut her loose.

Talk to your travel agent about ones she might have. Mine said she would be willing to do one for us free of charge.

I'm planning on going barefoot. I'm 5'9 and my fiance is 5'6, so even barefoot, there'll be a height difference.

So far, neither my parents nor my FIL have offered to help financially. However, knowing John's family, they will help in some way sometime.

Quote: Originally Posted by lil_miss_frogg I like the way you think! Makin him think he's getting what he wants. He always gets what he wants.....I want this. I am really thinking I am not going to give into him on this. Would it be okay if I had people up there with me and he doesn't? I'm so confused....I don't want to look stupid or anything like that! I would explain to him all the things you said to us. Remind him that he will now be a part of your daughter's life forever. It should be less about who gets what they want and more about what the ceremony symbolizes as a new family. Honestly, if you pour your heart out about this, I don't know how he could refuse. But no, it wouldn't be weird if you have people up there and he doesn't. You can have it whatever way you want. Does he not have any males that are super close to him? Maybe he's being insistent on it just being the two of you because he's worried about choosing people? Go ahead and talk it out with him. No fighting, just talking and listening. Find out what his real concerns about it are and see if you can meet those concerns while still honoring yourself and your daughter.

Quote: Originally Posted by Abbie regardless of anything, i would ask the resort and make sure to get the answer in writing and take it with you when you go that way there can be no argument. Unfortunately, I don't think an agreement from the resort is going to protect the wedding members if the government is involved. I would get the proper paper work done and have the photog be legal. Stuff like this can spiral out of control, especially if you are a guest in someone else's country. Could you not get it and still be fine? Probably... but is this something you really wanna risk to save $100?

Quote: Originally Posted by thomalm As a fan of what not to wear I say stick with the rose sash and blue dresses. Stacy London would say "they dont need to match they just need to go together" and pink and blue definately go together. You can blend the colors by wearing blue shoes (they could be your something blue) or aquamarine stone jewelry (aslo you something blue). OR change the BM dresses not yours. Great ideas! I think I'm going to incorporate some pink into their bouquets and maybe have mine wrapped in blue. You're right about this being a great way to get my something blue in. On a side note, one of my bridesmaids (future sister-in-law) had Clinton Kelly in her store last week (she manages a Staples here in Connecticut). She texted me because she couldn't remember his name to save her life. I loved the WNTW Bridal episode.

Welcome to the forum!

Wow, that's a good turn out percentage! Welcome to the forum.