I am so sorry to hear this! Even though it's nothing against you or your FI or isn't really personal, I can imagine how much this hurts you! Sounds like regardless of the loaction of the wedding (DW or big at home wedding) they wouldn't really be overly excited. I think that if this DW is something that you really want and you and your FI are excited about it, then you're going to have to try your best to focus on that instead!! (I know, not easily done!) Try to think about how beautiful everything is going to be and although they won't be there for the full time, at least they will be there to share it with you!