Dear Husband's Family,
I have tried everything to be nice to you people. You all seem to like me. It has been 6 years and I haven't gone away. Of course, when someone comes to visit you and bends over backward and asks for nothing in return, there really is no reason to be mean.
The one time we ask you for something, to come to our wedding or our AHR, NONE of you show up. Not ONE! You didn't RSVP to either event. Had I known you would completely ignore us, I could have saved quite a bit of money on the invitations and postage. Since you didn't bother to send a card, much less a gift, we are really in the hole. Not to worry, I'll be sending your bills out soon. We will accept cash or check, even credit cards.
I could care less about the monetary value. The issue is that you don't support your family (my husband), haven't welcomed me into your family, or even acknowledged that something major has taken place in our lives. Next time you ask us to attend an event or move back to Kansas, I will politely smile and tell you to F-off. I will not be apart of nor raise my children around the attitude of "if it's not convient for me, I can't be bothered with it."
Oh and BIL & SIL...You call $40 a gift? Seriously? You got married 3 weeks before us, on purpose, and caused a big stink within the family because of it. You were the Best Man! Togeher you and your wife make over twice what we do. Have you never been in a wedding?
I gave your wife a $75 shower gift, that she scheduled on THE SAME DAY AS MINE! I have tried to welcome her into your whacked out family!
Your wedding gift was $150, because your brother, my husband, was a bridal party member!
Please forgive me for not feeling satisfied with the $15 toaster from the shower and the 2 $20 bills. Oh, and the spoons, how could I forget the obviously re-gifted spoons? Three kitchen spoons, all different colors, different bands, and not on my registry was kind of a tip off.
I'm so glad that I don't have to see any of you again until Thanksgiving. I'll be able to cool off by then.