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Quote: Originally Posted by JamaicaBride062108 Good points Morgan. FI's brother is getting married 3 weeks before us! It has put a lot of financial stress on everyone involved. It is an honor to be a BM but I have NEVER been one without spending $1000. By the time you figure dress, shoes, travel, bachelorette, multiple showers, and the wedding gift! I feel as a bride, if I am requiring someone to do something it is my responsibility to pay for it. For example, we bought our BP attire since they were paying to come on the trip. They are on thier own for shoes because I don't care! Before we leave I'm making reservations at a spa for all of the girls to have manis and pedis, even those not coming, but I'm not paying for it. I agree. if the bride wants matching nails, she should pay for it. if she doesn't have the budget, then buy them the same color of nail polish. BMs never get the option to set a budget. I also agree that if you can wear whatever shoes you want then you should pay for those. Usually I'm told black shoes & I wear black shoes I already have. Only once we bought the same shoes. It was a mistake. 1/2 the girls hated them & their feet hurt all night. The dress thing is so tricky. It's become the standard to buy your own dress. If I had BMs, I wouldn't pay for the dresses because I bought mine for all their weddings. But, it's a tradition I really think should change. I feel the dresses should be part of the wedding budget or the girls should get to pick their own. I don't think it's wrong right now when BMs pay for dresses because that is how it's done. I just would like to see that change.

Quote: Originally Posted by Opice34 I remember hating that I had such an important position when I couldn't really afford to throw them the showers that I really wanted to throw them, or buy them the gifts I really wanted to buy them....in the end, I did just about everything for them that I wanted to do. That is terrible. I'm really sorry you had to do that. You will probably be great to your girls. I also learned how to put together cheap showers & bachelorette parties in college. They were always a lot of fun though. My bachelorette party was a few weeks ago. It was a house party & didn't cost anyone much at all. We had a blast & I'm so glad none of my friends spent a lot. It was probably cheaper than a regular night out. In the end it's about having your friends with you for support & showing them you love them. It's not about hair, makeup, dresses, and all that other stuff. I really think that gets in the way. it creates tension & starts fights. When someone else does the deciding for how someone else spends their money, it's a tricky situation. It's so much more fun to be in a wedding where there isn't all that extra stress. Most of us can pull ourselves together to look good in pictures. I also like to look back on the pictures & know we really were happy together & not all pissed at the bride or she was mad at us. The last wedding I was in was wonderful & being in it was a blast. It really shows in the pictures. The bride was really considerate & made it great to be in her wedding.

Quote: Originally Posted by cheese_diva I'm sorry you're having trouble with the $$$ part of being a BM. It's probably helpful for the current/future brides to hear about your situation as a reminder on how to treat their girls. Being a BM is such an honor but when accepting remember all the responsibility financial and supporting that goes with it. In the long run, you'll have the money and I'm sure you'll be glad you were part of her big day. Hang in there and just because the other BM's have jobs, they may be having $$ problems of their own. (for some, the more you make, the more you spend.) I don't think anyone expects to have to spend that much though. Usually the bride hasn't even thought about how much it will cost each BM. I think it's like many things in wedding planning- it gets more expensive than you originally thought. I've tried to say I can't be a BM because money was tight in college. It doesn't work. Maybe i could have been more direct, but I don't think it's easy to turn it down. I have learned how to say no to all the other expenses that pile up though. I never get my hair & makeup done anymore. I do my own nails (sally hanson french manicure pen- it's great). I refuse matching shoes, try to find the same dress for less money...I'm sure there are more. I am not rude about it. I am just not someone who buys expensive clothes, spends a lot on hair, makeup & manicures, so it really sucks to have to do it because someone else says to. I spent more on gowns one year in college than anything else. I agree it's an honor to be a BM. But, sometimes you just feel like a decoration. That your only purpose is to stand up there wearing a matching dress. Even some of the nicest brides can mistreat their BMs without knowing it. I don't think BMs should have to suck it up because it's the brides day unless the bride is willing to cover the cost of everything. But, I don't think a BM should be a PITA for no good reason either. I think everyone should just be considerate of each other. I do not think telling a girl in college she has to spend $100 on hair & makeup is OK. I don't think requiring anyone spend money they don't want to is OK. I think there should be a BM bill of rights. Maybe a contract between a bride & BM. Something that covers them both. You don't know what you are getting into when you agree to be a BM. I think that is a big source of the tension.

Quote: Originally Posted by Alyssa how about "love is the spice of life" i love it!

Maybe what I have is hypopigmentation. There is a triangle under my chest that stays white. It started in high school & I think it has gone now. The last few summers I haven't noticed it. It only pops up if I'm tan. I've been in the sun a lot less the last 4 years so maybe that is why it went away. When it was at it's worst people would ask why I had a funny tan line. They assumed it was from a swimsuit that had a bow or something. I take BC now, but I didn't take it when the triangle first showed up.

Quote: Originally Posted by LuvGrand I can help you but only if you add on chinchillas. Mine just had 3 babies a couple of weeks ago.....so now I have FIVE of them. I couldn't find any pictures of chinchillas in clothes. I did find lots of pictures of people wearing chinchillas. That's so sad. I don't want to think of how many chinchillas it takes to make one scarf. If you have funny chinchilla pics add them to the ferret thread.

This is hilarious! A pair of whitey tightys with skid marks that you hide your money in. I won't gross you out with the back side. Distrust Hotel Safes? Hide Valuables Where Crooks Never Look!|Gear Diary

Quote: Originally Posted by Tlseege Well, I agree that the DO NOT DISTURB sign doesn't work. To prove it Bryan (our photographer) did a test. He put $4 on his bed (which is where you are supposed to put tips). He then left his room and placed the DO NOT DISTURB sign on his door. When he got back, the money was gone. What Shawn actually did (and at the time I laughed at him, but we didn't have any problems) was he brought duct tape and taped our big bills and our wedding rings underneath the furniture. It worked very well I must say... since nothing was taken and we placed a piece of clothing next to the dresser to see if anyone even looked and that piece of clothing didn't move all week. I thought about duct tape but wondered if it was something they checked for. I'll remove the do no disturb tip from my list.

geez...you think with all that money they could by some taste. Tacky! They look like a joke. That tiara?

Quote: Originally Posted by Kat81 I love the paperback safe idea... I never heard that someones safe got broke into.. its too bad those safes dont have a place to put your own lock on them... That would be nice. Then you would just need to pack a masterlock. It was an inside job. Some employees can open the safes.

I am working on a list of safety tips for my guests. I’d love to hear people’s tips for keeping valuable’s safe in the hotel. Especially from the photographers on the forum, because you travel with valuables often. I figure you’d have some great tips. I know the best advice is to leave valuables at home. But, what about things you want to bring like cameras & camcorders? Or if someone wants to bring a laptop? Then there are passports, IDs, etc. Also, we’ll have more cash on us than I normally travel with for tips, paying for the van rental, etc. I’m trying to pay everything in advance, but some things I can’t. There are also wedding bands that will be left in the room until the ceremony. The main thing that makes me nervous is that you can’t trust the hotel safe. After Lisa’s guest’s safes were robbed at Dream’s Tulum I started compiling a list of safety tips. I’m trying to wrap up this project this week. Here are the things I’m doing so far: I bought all of our guest’s luggage locks with a combo. I know all the combos incase they forget. They can also change it if they want. (I bought them from this ebay seller for a little over $2 each shipped - [email protected]) I’m taking multiple SD cards & camcorder tapes & swapping them out, so if the equipment is stolen, at least I’ll still have the pictures/ videos. I haven’t decided what to do with my ring while we swim/ snorkel. One thought is to put it on my necklace, which would be more secure than my finger. Maybe multiple necklaces is the way to go incase one breaks. If I leave the room with anything valuable left in it, I will hang up the Do Not Disturb sign so my room doesn’t get cleaned at that time. Busted by the myth busters. Don't trust this to work. I might make a paperback safe (carve a chunk out of an old paperback book) Or maybe get something like this: PacSafe Travel Safe 100 Portable Safe Any other tips?

What about a dinner cruise? That could be fun. I'm sure others can chime in on good places to eat.

Quote: Originally Posted by Christa This ferret thing is COMPLETELY out of contro!! Now there are ferret threats? Do you think the Ferret Ethics Organization would like that Morgan?? I've already been kicked out. Don't really want to talk about it. It was really not a fair situation. I was set up. Quote: Originally Posted by DougsGirl i just didnt want to think about the demerits of a ferret prostitute Yeah, we've already gone there- ferret prostitute. My goal is to sidetrack every thread on the forum to the subject of ferrets. Hopefully that doesn't get me banned just like I'm banned from the FEO.

Quote: Originally Posted by carly Actually, I used to have 2 ferrets! Oscar and Herb, they were awesome. I just read the ferrets post today (cracking up the entire time!), but didn't have a chance to respond. I love me some animals wearing clothes, nothing cuter then that. OK, because I don't want anyone thinking they are too good for my imaginary ferret. What about you Abbie? Tell me you love my ferret or I'll keep spamming your threads with ferret pics.

Quote: Originally Posted by redheaney Morgan... Firstly, I want to tell you that I just love your cups! I think they look great & you've encouraged me to get my arse in gear and give them a go for my bridal party. WHERE did you get those brightly coloured floral rub-ons?!! I've hunted high and low (even went to the AC Moore website you mentioned) and can't find them anywhere! Also, the "paintpen" you made mention of... did you purchase that at AC Moore also? I saw some listed and wanted to be sure these would work! Quote: Originally Posted by LindsayG These are too cute, and I'm stealing your idea! I went to Dollar General this weekend and found cute travel mugs with a handle and lid in bright green and turquoise for $1.50 each. I plan on painting names on them, and I love the idea of the rub-ons. Would those be available at a craft store like Hobby Lobby? Are they with scrapbooking supplies or somewhere else that I wouldn't think to look? Great idea! Thanks! It was all from AC Moore. I would think they would be a hobby lobby. I also saw them at michaels. They are called Rub-ons. They were not with the scrapbooking stuff. They were with stenciles for painting decorations on walls & wood stuff. Ask an employee & they can show you where they are. There were a lot to pick from. The paint pen was in another spot too. I think it was with some wood stuff. There were a bunch of those too & I know hobby lobby used to carry (probably still do). I bought them from HL in high school for crafts.

Quote: Originally Posted by redheaney Morgan... Firstly, I want to tell you that I just love your cups! I think they look great & you've encouraged me to get my arse in gear and give them a go for my bridal party. WHERE did you get those brightly coloured floral rub-ons?!! I've hunted high and low (even went to the AC Moore website you mentioned) and can't find them anywhere! Also, the "paintpen" you made mention of... did you purchase that at AC Moore also? I saw some listed and wanted to be sure these would work! Quote: Originally Posted by LindsayG These are too cute, and I'm stealing your idea! I went to Dollar General this weekend and found cute travel mugs with a handle and lid in bright green and turquoise for $1.50 each. I plan on painting names on them, and I love the idea of the rub-ons. Would those be available at a craft store like Hobby Lobby? Are they with scrapbooking supplies or somewhere else that I wouldn't think to look? Great idea! Thanks! It was all from AC Moore. I would think they would be a hobby lobby. I also saw them at michaels. They are called Rub-ons. They were not with the scrapbooking stuff. They were with stenciles for painting decorations on walls & wood stuff. Ask an employee & they can show you where they are. There were a lot to pick from. The paint pen was in another spot too. I think it was with some wood stuff. There were a bunch of those too & I know hobby lobby used to carry (probably still do). I bought them from HL in high school for crafts.

Quote: Originally Posted by DougsGirl no, haha, and i'm kind of glad because i am thinking it might have to do with a ferret. eeew. Quote: Originally Posted by carly Great favor Ab! And the thread did take a turn, didn't it? What are you guys too good for ferrets? We've moved on to hamsters anyway. What about "No other couple you Salsa cute." Salsa= saw so...too much of a stretch? HA! snuck a ferret on your thread!

Quote: Originally Posted by JamaicaBride062108 You really can't blame Jumbo! He had such a traumatic childhood that this really is a harmless way of acting out. Can you imagine how awful it would have been in that compound, not going to school, only learning about weaponry and facism? Is he holding the bottom of the gun with his tail?

Quote: Originally Posted by JamaicaBride062108 Sorry. In my defense I was referring to a hamster. Here's a great picture of Kahula from Halloween. He was Mr. Peanut! OK, OK, we'll let it slide. Back to topic though. I'm a stickler for staying on topic

I really do think all of you are handeling it well. Money is touchy. Did his parents give you $5000 total or $5000 for the wedding & $5000 for the AHR? Either way, that's a lot of money. It's really hard to give someone money & not be judgy of what they spend it on. Weddings are a big test of how you are going to handle future problems. I really think things look good for you & your FI and his parents. The email from his dad was great & the reply was great. I don't know if parents ever stop judging kids for the things they buy. I'm a really good saver, but I find when I splurge I justify it to my mom like I'm a kid. The other day, she was doing the same thing to me about getting lasik. I realized that's exactly what i sound like when I buy anything expensive. So I just told her she deserves it & I think it's a great choice. Money can make people do weird things. You & your FI & future inlaws handled it well. It was probably a fight that needed to happen to strengthen the relationship. It's great to see your FI backed you up. I do think everything will blow over & everyone will understand the other's prospective.

Quote: Originally Posted by Rachelle E. yeah, if they gave you the money, then it's yours to spend however you'd like...even if it's on bagel bites and moutain dew! loL! and of course you'll be responsible if you go over budget! You guys are adults! I think she's not giving you enough credit. Ha ha! We threw a great party with bagel bites for everyone. They were awesome. I think I had 20 that night. We made 2 huge boxes from Sam's club. I'm so glad my AHR is at a friends house & I can be as tacky as I wanna be

Quote: Originally Posted by JamaicaBride062108 Gus the llama had so much fun at last year's Christmas party, he keeps donning his festive wear to try and re-create the moment. Carol of the Bells by our own Hamster Idol was certainly a highlight! We are talking about hamsters

Quote: Originally Posted by LC_Rachel Ya. That's Oscar De La Hoya's line. I hired a private detective. He was totally innocent.

Better shot of the costume