jajajaja

HELL NO don't change your plans. It's so funny as I was reading this I was like "wow- this reminds me of my own life." I am not close to my IL- for no good reason either. It's not a cultural thing . But we are VERY close to my family and my DH talks to my mom like every day on the phone and barely talks to his own mom. We have nothing against his family- it just works out that we are closer to mine. His family wasn't sure if they were coming to our wedding. It broke DH's heart but I know he really wanted the wedding in Mx. We talked about it if it was a deal breaker- I left it mostly up to him because it is HIS family. It might have been a deal breaker if my parent's said no- not that they ever would. His family ended up coming last minute. If I were you- leave it up to your FI. He is the one with the ultimate disappointment. I know you are upset for him, but it is his parents. If he is ok with continuing on, then do it. Don't let his parents upset you any longer. At this point, it's their loss. As for your private ceremony prior to leaving, I don't know if I would let them come. They sound like assholes and I totally wouldn't want them around raining on my parade. If they can't be supportive they shouldn't be there!

So he saw the dress before?

We had originally planned on just having the ceremony/reception at our resort. I convinced DH to go to LC instead. I'm so glad we did! It was gorgeous and I just wasn't satisified planning with the hotel WC. I felt I kept getting ignored.

What about Gettysburg Jenny? When we went there last summer they had all kinds of nightly ghost tours. That would be so fun. I watched the episode. It was suppose to have the most convincing evidence to date- hmmm...not so sure about that. Maybe I was confused and it's an upcoming episode. They still have a very active place and some good EVPs. One actually scared the shit out of me!

Quote: Originally Posted by Dez921714 Rachel - I didn't post it in the other threads, but I LOVE your new haircut!!!! Awww thanks. I had been waiting about a year to change my hair. So happy I did it!

Good luck! I got my fingers crossed!

LOL i hate when people change their siggies and avatar pics because it throws me off. And here I change mine all the time- haha. Welcome to the anonymous club!

Ghosts don't kill. People do. LOL

Yikes. No advice here but I feel for ya! That totally sucks and I would keep in on the DL with your family too. I wouldn't want them to get upset either. How did it come about that you were paying for them? Did FI just offer without your consent? Or did you begrudgingly say yes?

They said they caught the most convincing footage to date. DON'T MISS THIS EPISODE!! I'm so pumped to see what it is because in all the years (yep, been watching since day 1) I have been watching the show, I think they have caught some freaky ass crap.

I feel ya Jen. I changed mine last month and it was a PIA. I could only imagine having to go to Queens. I had fun watching all the weird people at our SS office though. I made Steve go with me because I didn't want to change my name but he was persistent. I did it to make him happy so I made him go through hell too. LOL

Oh that's a good movie. Back when I was blonde (LOL) and had short hair I used to have a lot of people tell me that I looked like the owner of Coyote Ugly. Lil or something.

Yari do it!!! Don't be a sissy.

Yippee- it's on tonight! I remember the previews were good ones.

LOL Erin I thought the same thing. I laughed because it was like an actual blue print. They put the area where the stairs would go in the candle outline. I thought it was a tad unrealistic but I liked the romantic notion.

Great review Helen. Your daughter was a gorgeous bride and you were a very pretty MOB! I liked your dress alot! As for you all getting sick going to LC- wow. It must be the luck of the draw. We had a very smooth ride back but my guests said it was rough going out. Must be the time of the day and how the tide is. Thankfully no one got sick! I'm sorry to hear you all weren't able to fully enjoy the trip!

We had a discussion about this on another thread. We brainstormed ways for the airlines to make money and I think they may have read our thread! I don't care if they take away the snacks. I never ate them. I just want cheaper ticket costs!

Quote: Originally Posted by thomastaci22 So I am beginning to wonder if I really need programs for our ceremony? It is going to be such a short ceremony and by that time, everyone will know who everyone is (after the shower, bach party, time in San Diego, etc.). Is anyone NOT having a program? I debated doing one. Honestly, I didn't do much for the wedding and felt I needed a few keepsakes. Plus there are some pretty details shots that the photog did. I'm glad I did one, but it was totally not necessary. It didn't take me long to make them and they were simple and inexpensive.

I ripped my plain white garmet bag. If I were to do it all over again, I would put it in one of those luggage carries that you can zip up and fold in half. It would be SO much easier to carry and deal with. My dress wrinkled some, but you have to fold it up at some point. I certainly was not tall enough to walk around wiht my dress high enough it didn't touch the ground. Plus it got heavy after awhile.

Very pretty! They look unique.

Oh and to add, if we got pregnant prior to that, it wouldn't have been a big deal. I would have been 26/27 and him 30/31. At that point in our life, we were more than ready to have a baby.

Back when were dating, I told my DH that we were getting old and I wanted to wait for children. We had been together for 3 yrs at that point and he didn't get what I had meant. I pointed out that at the time I was 26 and not engaged. I wanted at least a year to plan a wedding and I would prefer if we waited at least a year after we got married before we started to try. I then pointed out that it takes 9 months for a baby and that would make us much older- specifically him 34 at that point. Needless to say, we got engaged shortly after because I think he realized we couldn't just keep dating forever. LOL We kept talking about marriage, but never got the ring. So this was definitely a motivating factor so start taking that next step.

In this situation, I wouldn't tell all. I would pretend that you don't know any other details (at this point, FI is the only person that could tell her that you knew about Bob's bad behavior). I would counsel her just like I would a normal friend. I would be like "really? He didn't come home? THat's weird because FI came home. I would talk to Bob about it and see what he says." You don't have to confess, but I wouldn't convince her that he's not a cheater either.

I can see where you are coming from, but in the big picture, I think it's also a little unfair to expect friends/family members to plan their big events around our big events. Yes your wedding is VERY important but if they want to get married soon, I think it's unreasonable to make her wait just because you got engaged first. I'm glad you had the opportunity to vent and now you are kinda seeing that your intial reaction may have been a bit off base. I'm sure you are super stressed and I'm sure it doesn't take much to make you even more stressed. I've def been there. I also don't always get all this talk on this forum of MOH duties and their responsibilities. I mean yes, traditionally they are suppose to plan showers/bachelorette parties but I also think it's somewhat unfair of the bride to be pissed if they don't. It's like telling someone to throw you a bday party and then get mad when they don't jump at the opportunity to celebrate you. I hope this isn't coming out wrong, but I just think it's sometimes silly to get all worked up over people's responsibilities in the wedding. I didn't expect our bridal people to do anything but show up and be happy. And to hopefully not bitch along the way. That's just me though. I hardly ask people to help me with anything. I think this is a good opportunity for your MOH to learn how to be a better MOH and offer you the emotional support as well. She will know the pressures you are going through as a bride because she has just went through it herself. That's why this forum is so great- other brides get it. People in our lives usually don't because they either haven't been there or they forgot.

Quote: Originally Posted by ErinB I think we need little "My MOH/BM backed out" badges like the Biggest Loser badges! LOL I would love to see these. It seems to be a VERY common problem.