MikkiStreak

Quote: Originally Posted by jthrasherphoto.com Exactly. You NEED to take a stand against this. You should call the resort yourself and tell them they need to drop this fee or you'll take your business elsewhere. Tell them they can lose the $500, or lose thousands. It's their choice. You shouldn't have to put up with this. I agree with Jonathan---- and I would go to the reservations side of the business too. The wedding is almost treated like a separate entity in a lot of the resorts, so if you go to the wedding coordinator, they don't really care as much because some other bride will fill your shoes on that date. But your wedding has far more impact on the resort revenue on the reservations side. $3-10K for wedding expenses doesn't give you as much negotiating power as the impact of your reservations going to a different resort. If you have 50 guests (for even 1/4 of their capacity) who stay for 4 days, you're talking about $45-50K in revenue leaving their pockets for a different resort. So that reservations manager is going to take you a lot more seriously than the wedding coordinator. Anyways, just my opinion.....

hehhee.... I guess since this is an internet thing, it should be called a "blog" instead of a "journal"... Angela, yea I have that issue too---- I have to dig around for old posts, and now it might be difficult to find some items because of the cleanup. If posts/threads were deleted that were "conversational" or even some old planning posts, etc... I'm not sure how Tammy and the mods determined what to keep/delete, etc.... Something like this would keep it all in one thread in a central location. I think Tammy may have had something like this planned awhile back, but I can't remember.... I vaguely remember the subject coming up in regards to how people had a planning blog on The Knot....

I like that idea too. Also, I love seeing the planning posts the brides are doing right before they leave, but later on, they can be harder to locate unless you know who posted it, or a keyword to search for. I thought it might be convenient to have a folder called Planning Journal or something and they can be posted there. A bride could start the "journal" right at the beginning and then add things as they go along instead of having to compile everything at the last minute to post....

dammit, I miss snow!!! and seasons!!! I'm envious.... a relaxing weekend at a lakehouse.... *sigh* Glad you had a good weekend.

Quote: Originally Posted by beachbride08 I am having my wedding at the Iberostar resort and they are charging a $300 outside photgrapher fee. I am hoping I can negotiate that fee once we get there since we will be paying for a lot of "extras" maybe they will cut us a deal. If not, we just have to cough up the $300 so we can have the photographer we want. I didn't mean to hijack, but all these fees get me fired up! It might be more worthwhile to address this fee before you get there. We had chosen Iberostar when we were first planning and were told of the fee. I guess I look at it like this....once your guests start booking and you start planning the wedding there, what is the resorts incentive to cut you a break on this? You have much more "power" to negotiate NOW, before you're locked in and your guests start booking...

Yep, send them. It would be awkward for them to not send an invite after the STD, despite the news that they won't be able to travel due to pregnancy. I always look at the invite like this: The invite is your way of telling these people "we love you and your role in our lives is important enough that we want to share the most memorable day of our lives with you." Invitations are sent based on how we feel about people, and expected response shouldn't influence us in making our decisions on who to send them to.

Paula, hopefully I'll remember---- but I think our original STD had similar wording.... I'll look at it tonight and post if there's anything worthwhile in it...

Quote: Originally Posted by CaliaA07 First let me say I do not clump all woman in to one batch. I don't believe all girls who have had abortions are hoochies. I have very personal thoughts on this I'd rather not share. I work with CPS very closely and handle cases of children who have been taken out of their families houses and put into foster care so I have a glimpse that foster care is not that great. I actually have quite a few big disagreements with it. I agree--- foster care / group homes, etc... are a great "concept", but just like a lot of things--- when you add human influence and political/government sponsorship, the reality gets muddied and separated from the original concept. But, here's something to consider---- 1) How many families in the US are created thru biology -vs- other methods? 2) Of those numbers, what is the rate of abuse within each segment? The point I'm trying to make is that the same societal issues that plague biological families, also plague adoptive families. The difference tho is that the quantity of biological families out there is higher than those created by adoption, and without looking "outside the box", it's easy to stereo-type that abuse is primarily an issue prevalent in biological homes. Another thing that skews the numbers, is that a *lot* of adopted kids out there have been raised to feel like they are indebted to their adopted parents. Those kids are more willing to hide abuse because they know what it's like to be taken from one family and put into another, and they usually don't want to have that experience again in their lives. And- there is still a huge number of adopted families that "hide" their adoption status from the general public. So a great number of families that are believed to be biological, are in fact- adopted. Yes I am pro-choice on that women who have been raped, incest have every right to make that choice. But I also see girls who are just out there and know in every way they could become pregnant and see abortion as a quick easy way to solve the problem. I think it's easy to believe this, but I also think there's a lot of 'behind the scenes' that people easily ignore. First, most kids are a product of environment & conditioning. Example: If you grow up being abused, unloved, ignored, neglected---- you have to consider the affect this has on someone. Human nature leads us to find our own way to "fix" that, and for most girls- they find that in the form of a boy who pays positive attention to them. Just like if you come across a child who has been neglected---- they are starving for some positive attention, and they will usually take that wherever they can, from whoever they can. You also have kids who simply don't think they are worth much, and this affects their behavior also. It's a socio-economic fact that like minded people gravitate toward like minded people. If you have a kid growing up low income, without positive influences around them to show them anything better, then what can we expect but more of the same behavior? How are they supposed to want this "great life" everyone talks about, if they've never known that kind of life to exist in their own reality? Seeing the children I do and the families I've seen the bad and good of both sides of foster care. I've also seen the abuse of children first hand. Being a child of an abusive family and then working with it might make me biased. But I didn't mean to come out and be stereotypical which I'm not. Growing up I adamantly did not want children because I did not want to raise my children like I was raised. It took me a while and alot of people to tell me just b/c of my abuse I would not do the same. As soon as I realized this and got use to the idea of wanting children I had it ripped away from me. Then I go in and see these children who have all the hope in the world, and being abused and women who have 5 abortions and just can't seem to get in their head how to stop it and wonder how crazy this world is. It drives me nuts when I hear people saying things like "she has options, she doesn't have to get an abortion" or "she doesn't have to get an abortion- she could place that kid for adoption" or "she should raise her kid." The reality is, girls are told they have those three options, but that's about all they know. I knew what my "options" were--- abortion, adoption, raising her. But in that moment when I found out I was pregnant, I found out how little I really knew about each of them. Abortion information was easily available--- but I had no clue about the methods, risks, and emotional/mental impact of abortion. I knew about adoption- hell, I'm an adopted child myself. But I had no clue about types of adoption (closed, semi-private, open) or agency -vs- private, or any of the legalities about it, much less the long-term consequences for myself *and* my child. And I knew raising my child was an option---- but I had no knowledge of welfare programs, health programs, WIC, etc... that could help me until I could financially provide for her on my own. And most of all---- I had no clue where to even start getting that information so I could make a decision. So, in the highest state of ignorance I've ever had in my life, I made a life-changing decision that has been deemed as an "informed decision" by society. Ironically, it wasn't until about 5 years after this event, when I began to do public-speaking about each of these options, that I actually could have made a truly "informed" decision. blah, blah, blah---- since I put my replies within the quote, i didn't meet the minimum word count to post this, without adding something here...

Quote: Originally Posted by CaliaA07 What irks me is people who can have kids up the hoolah (haha) and then abuse them or girls who are hoochies and have abortions. MODS: FEEL FREE TO DELETE IF YOU THINK THIS IS 'INFLAMMATORY' (not intended that way, but I realize our goal is to encourage while discussing- and maybe this doesn't fit that category) ok, I gotta comment because this is one of my pet peeves---- stereo-typing without cause. The "ability" to abuse children has absolutely nothing to do with one's ability/inability to biologically procreate. In fact, a huge reason why we hear so much about abuse of biological children as opposed to adopted children, is because the media is geared to view adoption as "loving" solution, and the financial backing that drives the politics of adoption comes from adoptive parents, not young unwed mothers. Only when one attends adult adoption workshops/seminars/support groups, will one actually hear the stories of what life is really like for adopted kids--- an equal number of the stories will be "happy" and "sad"... And stereo-typing the majority of women who have had abortions as "hoochies" is really offensive to me, to be honest. Most of the studies done on abortion statistics show the demographic with the highest number of abortions to be the middle-class white girls----- most of whom aren't promiscuous, but are simply young, ignorant of the real facts about sex, and unaware of other resources available to them.

hmmm... didn't think I'd be down that many.... if I remember, I was somewhere close to/around 2000 posts. Ok--- now I'm curious, so I'm "officially" recording my count, just so I can see where I wind up when it's all said and done. I'm sure I've bumped down a title, but I lost my last one a long time ago and just bought my own anyways, so it won't go away. Post count: 1310

Quote: Originally Posted by meandpaul Well, my situation is a bit different. I got pregnant and had my daughter at 17. I love my daughter with all that I am although I am glad that I had her early and unexpected. I am not a "baby" person. I dont want this to sound harsh and ungrateful but I do not want more children. I love babies as long as they are someone else's. My friends have small children and I can play with them but then I am ready for them to go home. I think part of my reluctancy to have more kids comes from my experience with my daughter. It has been hard. I know most of that is b/c I had her so young. I was 7 months pregnant when I graduated high school. I never married her father (he was, and still is, an ass). I have had to do most of this on my own (although my mom helped a lot, she doesnt replace a "partner/husband/father"). Financially, buying a home, sending myself to college, working full-time, school full-time, making sure daughter has all that she needs and some of what she wants. She is now 15 and the emotional part of her life (boys, peer pressure, school) has given a new definition to the term "difficult raising a child". I know all parents go through some of these obstacles but maybe it helps to explain my reason for not wanting to procreate any more. I even checked into being a surrogate for a family. They decided to go another route b/c it had been so long since I had my daughter (they were going to spend a lot of $ so they wanted someone who they felt could "more certainly" give them a child). Anyway...just my thoughts...hope I didn't come across as an ungrateful heifer. Sheez, I think you crawled inside my head... "ditto" doesn't even come close to how similar I feel on this subject... When I was young (high school, etc...) I really wanted kids---- almost everything was 'geared' toward that mentality. And then I met the perfect asshole, found out I was pregnant at 19, and so began the roller coaster. My story is slightly different tho. As some of you know (and most don't)- I gave birth and gave in to pressure--- I placed her for adoption. That experience was enough to shatter me in every sense of the word. It took about 4 years before I even got to the point where I wanted to "fix" myself mentally/emotionally. But despite that experience, I've never wanted any more children. In a generalized, concept way--- I just like my life the way it is and at my age (37), I have no energy, ambition, or desire to run around after a small child for years and years, and wind up almost being a senior citizen standing up as one of the "parents" at a high school graduation. I love kids---- Frank and I constantly are oohing & aaahing over kids, and we'll even make the comments like 'awww, don't you want to have a mini-us?'..... and then the child screams, throws a tantrum- and we look at each other like, 'screw that' and keep walking. And even tho my daughter was adopted at birth---- fast forward to her life at 14 and that's where I entered again and have had to assume the role of parenting her, because both of her "parents" (I use that term very loosely to describe these people's role in her life) stopped being parents when she was 10 and they stuck her in group homes/homeless shelters/foster homes. *This* reality is far sufficient to kill any idea or vague fleeting desire to parent anyone else. It's taken 3 years to get Audrey's life stabilized and focused in the right direction. There isn't anything I want to see happen that would throw it all out the window again...

Quote: Originally Posted by Julesr I just tried it, I did a double post in Carly's bouquet question post, but I am not given the option to delete it. Odd. It's the same for me... I noticed awhile back that I could delete my own own posts, but after awhile, that 'delete' button wasn't there.

Quote: Originally Posted by leigh miller im late to this thread! sorry just saw it. im not sure if the leigh youre talking about is me, but i just wanted to say thats the opposite of my stand on the issue. while most of my wedding packages include the digital negatives on DVD for personal use i retain the copyright always. ive turned down weddings because the client wanted me to turn over the copyright to them. here in the states whomever takes the photo has the copyright UNLESS there is some other written agreement. what i grant is limited usage right for personal purposes. making prints, personal websites, etc... the images cannot be sold or published without my permission. really that limited usage usually gives couples what they need. my bad.... I was thinking it was you I read it from.... it's been a really long time tho. I just remember when I saw the post about ownership of images, it stuck in my mind because no one had ever mentioned that before in response to brides asking for contract advice.... I was probably thinking of someone else....

Quote: Originally Posted by starfish kate We all have our Secret Santa assignments so how should we handle it when we get our gifts? Should we post a "thank you" to the giver, or wait until the end and share the giver/gift (if you want) at the end of the month? I know we can send PM's, but it would be fun to see who had whom, and what everyone got. Just curious. Here's an idea: Send your recipient something that is a clue to your identity (ex: if you had posted on here that you were a recruiter in your profession, you could send a "help wanted" ad from the paper; or if you love to bake, you could send a little cookie; etc...). Drea could post a list of who participated in the draw. Then, when you each get your gifts, you could look at the list and compare it to your 'clue' and post a message with your guess at who your SS is....

Susan, those are absolutely stunning! All of the ones you posted are really great shots that give a great storyline summary of the day!

Quote: Originally Posted by LC_Rachel That pic is hilarious. I need to watch South Park more. I love when they make fun of celebrities/people who I recognize. ok, I have no idea why this popped into my head when I read your comment, but it still cracks me up---- I've always been a huge SP fan.... so several years ago, I stayed with my folks a couple days before I moved into my house. So my dad (who was about 75-77 at the time) and I were sitting in the living room, and I thought I'd watch it with him and see if he thought it'd be funny (don't even ask me why I thought a 77 year old man would find SP funny).... but my dad is this huge, die-hard, ra-ra/go team, old-fashioned Catholic..... So just guess which episode came on that night---- Yep.... Jesus-vs-Satan.... hehehe, welcome to South Park dad!

Wouldn't it be nice if they could give some nitro to customers so they at least don't *care* about the pain as much during the experience?!? The tat looks good Heidi!

Agree with everyone else. The cut looks amazing! Very... "Don't screw with me! I'm in CHARGE!!!" The color is very natural and they did an excellent job blending the tones together. I think the hair thing is in the air---- I had mine cut from waist length to shoulder length a couple weeks ago. First Ann, then Robin, then me, then Jaime, now you. We're all in the mood for some positive change!

Jamy, I agree with you---- racist/degrading comments don't come out of a person unless it's a real thought somewhere inside them. I grew up in a racist community, with parents who were the complete opposite. It's always been something that drives me insane and angers me. I was listening to the radio this morning, and one of the comments made was the argument about 'product of the environment'... ie: common statements in prison/society that make someone more 'immune' to the negativity about the words and don't realize how offensive it is. I gotta say, that 'excuse' drives me crazy. Just because someone lived in that kind of an environment doesn't mean they don't know the difference between right/wrong. I mean, if you grew up isolated with racist parents- ok, I can understand that argument UNTIL you are exposed to outside influence (school/religion/society). But the moment you see/hear/read things in society, you KNOW people find it offensive and regardless of what your personal beliefs are, you know to NOT say them. So if you say it- you pay the price, and well you should!!!

Jamy, I agree with you---- racist/degrading comments don't come out of a person unless it's a real thought somewhere inside them. I grew up in a racist community, with parents who were the complete opposite. It's always been something that drives me insane and angers me. I was listening to the radio this morning, and one of the comments made was the argument about 'product of the environment'... ie: common statements in prison/society that make someone more 'immune' to the negativity about the words and don't realize how offensive it is. I gotta say, that 'excuse' drives me crazy. Just because someone lived in that kind of an environment doesn't mean they don't know the difference between right/wrong. I mean, if you grew up isolated with racist parents- ok, I can understand that argument UNTIL you are exposed to outside influence (school/religion/society). But the moment you see/hear/read things in society, you KNOW people find it offensive and regardless of what your personal beliefs are, you know to NOT say them. So if you say it- you pay the price, and well you should!!!

Quote: Originally Posted by starchild That really is gorgeous. I feel like I've seen it before, maybe on a wedding show? I think you're right---- in the Facility album is a photo of a reception room where the ceiling was higher in one area than the other half of the room... if I remember correctly, there was a "Platinum Weddings" episode that featured this. I remember the planner and bridal family having a problem deciding the layout of the room in relation to a dance floor...

Ok, now I know how much of a geek I am---- when I read the title of the thread, my first thought was that someone was looking for a crack code key for their pirated software....

Hey, there's a photographer from Destin, FL on the forum---- not sure if that's close to the Keys or not... Here's a link to the post they put up with some TTD photos.... good quality, love their color saturation... http://bestdestinationwedding.com/fo...ttd-shoot.html

Michelle---- I think the first one looks beautiful on you! And I think it really gives you an hourglass shape in the best way (ie: hips/boobs proportionate, etc...).... love the corset back too---- I dont' know, it just is really flattering on you and there wasn't anything that was like, "well <this> is great but this..." It just looks great everywhere.

I think most of the websites I've seen have said that for local weddings, they really just put together a package of local information, maps, resources and contacts for the guests and then maybe throw in some snack food. If you want to keep the costs low---- you could skip the bag itself and do something like wrap the materials in some tissue paper with a nice ribbon around it, and then put some snack food with it if you feel like it needs something more...