A10CalGal
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Everything posted by A10CalGal
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Quote: Originally Posted by DreaW I'm sorry but how is that a reward....take him out to dinner? Sorry the teacher side of me is coming out I think you need to have a small casual meeting with both men in the house and talk to them about it. Totally agreed girlfriend. One thing I've been wanting to discuss is that Richard starts this whole "I want to go live with mom" conversation at like 10:00 at night, which is when Rafael is going to bed. So I hear pieces & parts of the discussion, my anxiety level goes up, Rafael comes to bed & I know he is distraught, none of us sleep, it sucks. (this happened on Sunday night, and has happened twice before, same thing). So, might as well roll it all into one convo I guess. Dammit!
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Quote: Originally Posted by IrieBride08 I think that making him ride the bus and be responsible for his own transportation needs will help him develop character and become more mature. He really will have no reason to if everything is done for him on his terms. Is this something you can discuss with DH? I mean, 16 is practically a grown man! (Why doesn't he ride the bus? Is it safe?) I couldn't agree more! This has been my stance from day one. Yes, he's sixteen years old, has the body of a man. He is "grown up" when it suits him - you know, when he stays out until 2am and comes home with alcohol on his breath, when he has a girlfriend, etc. I think my hubby really feels this way too, yet he allows his guilt about having "children of divorce" get to him and he spoils this child by not requiring him to step up. Clearly this is an issue. When Rafael gets to the point where hes pissed by his sons behavior, then he lays down the law & requires something of him...then it slips back to this.
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Quote: Originally Posted by DreaW ok my question is why didn't he go to school. I know that he is R's son but he needs to tell you also, not just ask dad, you're his new step-mom too and have some authority. R. should have talked to you, especially if you're his transportation. Sorry if my response bothers some of you girls but Christa I'm totally on your side with this situation. Thanks Drea! That's the thing, Rafael easily could have told me this last night after he & Richard talked...it's not like I was sleeping. And, I don't really know why he didn't go. I'm thinking Rafael caved in because he feels guilty about all the shit that's been going on with Richard lately (guilt about his mom, missing his mom & brother, etc) & he did really good last night at a football game. Like it's some twisted reward for playing well. Bottom line, I just don't appreciate being left out of the loop & being hung out like that.
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Quote: Originally Posted by IrieBride08 Ok, no offense, but his behind needs to be on that bus! (I can't believe he could be riding the school bus, but has you as a chauffeur instead.) I think he's old enough to "suffer" for the cause! LOL!! Thank you!! Totally! When he realized this would be coming to an end because I'm getting a job, he announced at the dinner table "I don't want to wait to get my license and I don't want to ride the bus" I think this episode today just blew me up mentally because I think he should be taking the bus anyway, and I don't know how I got myself in this position where I'm his driver, and being taken for granted in my opinion.
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Thanks for bringing me down & being honest with me Angela!! I guess I'm bothered by Richard in general right now...he's being a complete premadonna 16 year old lately. Every 5 days he starts talking about moving home with his mom because he wants to drive. Yeah, she'll let him drive without a license, we won't. Yet, he won't put the effort in to do what he needs to do to get his license. He failed the CA permit test twice before we came to Seattle. I spent $300 non-refundable on driving school for him, which you have to do in CA. He never took the classes because he never passed the permit test. Yet, he's pissed off at us because we won't let him drive. See how this works? Around in circles. And I'm his chaufer...so yeah, I guess that's what is really bothering me.
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OK, so this is so funny, I just made another post about my DH & this morning because when I composed this post earlier it didn't post. I was like DAMMIT! I typed all that & now it's gone. So, forgive my repetition. And, regarding the random testing...I've administered these programs before, and for it to be legal, it really has to be random. Which basically means a computer program picks a name out of the hat every month (or whatever the frequency is), and that's just it. the program has to cover all employees & be equally applied for it to be legal. I would have liked to have this info before going thru this whole process with the company & accepting the job. I mean, I really have issues with working for a company that does this. I have no problem if they do "reasonable suspicion" testing, but random on admin people? LAME!
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GRRRRR. I am livid right now...I had kind of started to get over it & then he just called & refused to acknowledge my pissed-offed-ness. Heres the deal: I take Richard to school every morning. Literally, this is why I get up at 6:30 in the morning, so I can take him to school. I really don't mind overall since I don't have a job to be at (for a few more weeks), but he's obviously going to need to figure something else out. Anyway, I've had a rough few nights of sleep, and had a really hard time getting up this morning...but I did. Richard isn't up. It's 7:00 & we should be leaving in the next 5 minutes. I'm knocking on his door, telling him he's late, get up, come on, lets go...nothing. I make my coffee, and try again (I hate having to hassle him to get up!). Nothing. Third time I go in & turn on his light & point it at his face "GET UP! YOU ARE LATE FOR SCHOOL!" He rolls over & says "my dad said i could stay home today" WHAT?? Are you kidding me? So, of course I call Rafael & ask him what's going on. "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you." WHat? So, let me get this straight...I'm exhausted, yet dragged my ass out of bed so I could take Richard to school, and hassled him to get up for like 15 minutes & now I find out that his dad, my husband, told him he doesn't have to go to school today & failed to inform ME, the one who provides the transportation FUCK! I was pissed obviously. All DH could say is "I forgot to tell you, I'm sorry." Whatever, I hung up & went to work out. So, now it's like 4 hours later & DH calls to say "hi" from work and totally doesn't acknowledge what happened earlier. He's just chit chatting. I hate it when he does that. So, me being me, I finally just say "honey, can you please acknowledge that I am pissed off about this morning. I feel like I'm being taken for granted & I feel like you have complete disrespect for my time." Well, of course he thinks I'm being rediculous, which obviously I disagree with. He says "how can you be pissed at me, I forgot to tell you, that's all" ? So I asked him when this whole not going to school decision got made. He said last night before he came to bed. So I asked why he didn't just tell me when he came to bed? "I was going to tell you in the morning" - bull shit. That doesn't make any sense. OK, so I'm probably blowing this out of proportion to some extent. But, really, I am going out of my way to take his son to school, and I expect to be kept in the loop on this situation! Not to mention that there is a bus that could pick his spoiled ass up about a block away - but he's too good to ride the fricking bus. I told Rafael that if he couldn't understand why I'm pissed, and show some respect for my time, then "y'all can figure out how to get his ass to school" That's when he said he'd talk to me later. It's totally the principle for me. Am I over reacting?
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I went to the new job yesterday for all the pre-screen shit. OMG, not only did we do the whole 1.5" of hair drug test, but they did a full on physical. I had to fill out a health history, disclose all the medication I take, etc. I was feeling pretty violated. While doing this, I find out from the nurse attending to all this crap that not only does the company do pre-hire hair testing, but they do random drug testing as well. And the random doesn't just stop at piss, it's hair too! Politically I am totally opposed to this kind of invasion of privacy unless someone is driving some kind of public transportation or working with explosives or heavy machinery that could kill other people. I sucked it up & dealt with this pre-screen stuff because I really wanted this job. It would have been helpful in my decision making process to know that this company feels that it has the right to know what a fucking accountant is doing on her time off at any point during employment. Yes, I'm a former pot head, and yes, I smoke pot every once in a while. And honestly, even if I didn't ever do it again I would still feel this way. It's the principle to me. Why do I want to work for a company that starts off with an air of distrust & then continues that through out my career with them? It's none of their business what's in my hair. Sure, if I'm acting like a retard & not doing my job, fine, drug test me. But just because you want to know if I've done ANYTHING that you disapprove of in the last 90 days, in my FREE TIME - I have serious issues with that premis. I am pissed. I am pissed at my recruiter for not telling me all of this. I am pissed that such an awesome job (I thought) is going to make me compromise my beliefs & that I'm folding to the man just to make a goddamn living crunching numbers. AHHHHH!!! Thanks for reading.
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Awww, she looks so pretty! I love her dress. Welcome back!
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So, we had a small group too - like 17 or something from age 12 to 86. We had our little ipod setup & after dinner everyone just started having fun, requesting songs & dancing with eachother. We got stupid, we had fun, it was totally awesome. I really didn't know if anyone would be into dancing, but it turned out excellent. We also had those giant sparklers for people to play with - I think that may have been what started the dancing. And, as for Drea & Erik's wedding, yep it was totally cool to chill on the beach & drink wine & chat. It was fun, and I had just met these people!
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Question for those who wrote their own vows...
A10CalGal replied to rodent's topic in General Wedding Planning Information
Oh my gosh, I totally had these great vows that I was sure I had memorized. . . I mean it came from my heart, so it seems like it should be no big deal to keep it together right? Ummm, yeah, no! I completely lost it at the altar, mostly because his vows to me were so amazing & made me cry. When it came to my turn I totally had to improvise, and I know I didn't get to say everything I meant to. Although, I think all of that made it that much more memorable & special. My reccomendation: notecards! -
Oh, that is fricking perfect. I HATE those commercials "have a happy period" - I always say "f*ck you!" outloud when that damn commercial is on.
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For those with children....
A10CalGal replied to TracyK's topic in Wedding Etiquette, Traditions, to dos
We included Rafael's sons in our ceremony. Richard, the oldest served as Rafael's best man. Jonathan walked me down the aisle. It was very important to have them both involved - and it was wonderful to have Jonathan walk me down the aisle since I don't have a dad or grandfather to do that for me. -
What do you do right when the ceremony is over?
A10CalGal replied to rodent's topic in General Wedding Planning Information
After the ceremony we got caught up hugging & thanking everyone, since many of our guests arrived the day of the wedding. Then we walked down the aisle & everyone followed us up to the pool patio for our cocktail hour. We did a shot of tequila with everyone (great photo op) and then went back down to the beach for pics while our guests enjoyed drinks & apps. -
My contact was Monica, at this email address: [email protected] I heard back from her the same day I sent the first email. I would try re-sending your inquiry - I remember having issues about 50% of the time sending emails to addresses like this, like they never got there. I was also going to tell you that we didn't really have a "curfew" with their service. The driver just gave us his cell # and we called him about 15 minutes before we were ready to go. Very flexible. Quote: Originally Posted by BRIDEZILLA Hey Christa, Do you know who you worked with or their contact info? I sent an email to the general email address a few days ago (it was a @prodigy.net.mx address) and have not heard back. Thanks!
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Oh Amber you are so cute! That's awesome that you are able to do all of those things...I don't think it makes you cheap - I think it makes you smart!! As far as the cake...I used CSH's cake. So, are they saying they just can't provide a cake because their baker is out of town?? Hmmm...that cake was really good! Regarding transportation - I think your budget is more than reasonable. As I mentioned before I did r/t transportation from CSH to downtown Cabo at $12pp. And,OMG, you are getting married in a month!! EEK! How exciting!
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So, I got some really bad news....
A10CalGal replied to MsShelley's topic in Just venting or funnies
Well, "normal" sounds like good news Shelley! I would request to get a copy of your labs though, so youi can see the difference. I would take it as good that the tech called you...the doctor usually calls w/bad news. But def get back in there & get a full explanation so you can put your mind at ease. YAY! -
Great job girl! THat is awesome. And, you really do look great. Kudos
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Well I had a great experience with Ixchel in March of this year. I paid $12pp round trip from CSH to down town Cabo.
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I think this is a completely normal feeling to get at about the 6 month mark. Just consider it "paying your pre-wedding dues" - seriously, you are good. And, damn girl, you've got a lot of other BIG stuff going on!! You'll be fine.
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Stephanie 525 found "The one"
A10CalGal replied to StephanieMN's topic in Destination Wedding Dresses, Wedding Attire & rings
First off, congrats on finding THE ONE! That is super exciting. And, OMG, that is so funny that you took the sign! What are you going to do with it? You can't let FI see it... -
So, I got some really bad news....
A10CalGal replied to MsShelley's topic in Just venting or funnies
OK, well this might make more sense if you have a copy of your lab results in front of you, but I'll give it a stab... Day 7 of your cycle falls smack dab in the middle of the "follicular phase." During this phase, FSH levels actually RISE in comparison to baseline. The FSH reference ranges my lab tests show are as follows: Follicular Phase 2.5 - 10.2 Mid-Cycle Peak 3.1 - 17.7 Luteal Phase 1.5 - 9.1 My understanding also is that it is ideal to do hormonal testing towards the end of the luteal phase of your cycle - like day 25. Anyway, don't panic. I think there is a lot more info for you to extract from your doctor. If you are interested in understanding all of the phases, there is a really good wikipedia article with a nice chart that helps: Menstrual cycle - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia I hope this info helps you -
So, I got some really bad news....
A10CalGal replied to MsShelley's topic in Just venting or funnies
Shelley - sorry to hear, but I don't think you should totally lose hope. I went thru the whole panel of hormone testing, for other reasons, but in any case my doctor explained every single line item to me. Questions: 1. at what point in your cycle did you have your blood drawn? 2. did you have your other hormone levels tested as well? (estrone, estrodiol, progesterone, etc)? 3. what kind of doctor are you seeing? -
Quote: Originally Posted by akh well, it sounds like you're approaching it the "right" way by comparing everything (salray, benefits, commute, etc.) and the long term vs. short term benefits. not sure any of us can add anything that you haven't already considered ... you're even making a spreadsheet (a girl after my own heart!). i guess - just think about things like ... do you see yourself at any of these companies long term? can you go back and spend the day w/someone (shadow someone) just to see what it might be like to help you decide? good luck! Great idea Ann (shadowing) - I know I could do that with the first job I mentioned. It's with a small consulting firm. They really want me & are expecting me to call them soon to tell them how I am feeling about it. Maybe I will call & ask if I can spend a day with the hiring manager in the field. The other jobs are thru a recruiter, and its all very "controlled." I just have to remember that long term I need a happy place with good people & challenges for me. I think this consulting opportunity really is more of a "career" than a "job" and I definitely see myself being there for the long haul. These other opportunities are just kinda "eh" - but good money to start. I have that feeling that this is a pivotal moment in my life story...I better not f- it up!!