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I need to vent to my fellow BDW brides.. I think I am just hurt by someone I called a friend. Who I have laughed with for months and shared destination wedding stuff with and never for once thought a 45 year old woman still needed to grow up. If you are a believer and care so much about your faith, isn't it a little hypocritical to not accept everyone as they are? So we may not share the same beliefs and maybe I will get my faith back someday; but who are you to not just accept me as I am?.....The cool person you have been friends with for a months?! I never put my religious beliefs anywhere in our relationship. Honestly who I pray to isn't anyones business nor should it affect our friendship. My mother taught me how to love everyone for who they are: skin color, gay, straight, right wing, left wing, pray to Jesus, Buddah, Allah WHOEVER! As long as their friendship is genuine and they treat you right, who cares about the small differences. Trying to make someone feel bad for not believing in the same as you only makes you look ignorant. I feel sorry for you who doesnt except everyone as they are and who just need to GROW UP! I think when you act like a child and have to stoop so low to hide albums on Facebook or block someone from commenting, you seriously have issues way bigger than a friend who has different views. I think your faith that you speak so highly of might have dropped the ball and maybe you should read Romans 2:1 Romans 2 1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. My amazing wedding is only 27 days away and I refuse to let anyone bring me down. Especially someone who yearns for the attention of others so bad to get by that as soon as one person gets off the coo coo train they retaliate by forgetting all that they have learned from their faith in the first place. Have any of you ever been made to feel like you aren't a good friend because you don't have the same views on things? Am I the only one that thinks that's horrible? :confused: Venting sure did make me feel better!

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I completely agree with you! One of my top pet peeves in life is when people use religion to justify their unkind, intolerant, and inequitable attitudes.

 

Hopefully now that you've vented, you'll be able to move on as if nothing has happened. With your wedding on your doorstep, you don't have any time or energy to waste worrying about or being angry at someone. You probably don't have enough time or energy for all the fun and good stuff! So why waste any on the negative?

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Thanks you- yes I am moving forward and my wedding is going to be fabulous! I'm so excited I can't even sit down for 5 minutes, haha.. Sometimes we have to realize that not everyone has home training and comes from a good place. All I can do is continue to not judge and treat everyone with respect and hold those people close to me that reciprocate that... Those who don't- don't have a place in my heart!

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FIRST OF ALL..I'M NOT 45..thank you...and even if i was..i'm still fly..but i won't be the big 4-0 until december..thanks!!!

 

second of all..i'm not judging you..not once have i judged you..rather, i've walked and talked my faith and beliefs and tried to provide 'proof' as you asked...i've been kind, considerate and even listened to what you've had to say.  i even sent you a heartfelt bit of luck for your big day...how that could be seen as anything other than kind, considerate or even tolerant is beyond me.

 

third, because i don't agree to disagree..you decide to 'blast' or vent your feelings online?  REALLY?  uhm, that's childish in my opinion and frankly, unwarranted, but you do what you need to do.  i'm disappointed that you decided to take it to BDW.com but OBVIOUSLY you did what you feel you needed to do.  i'd much rather you would've been woman enough to say, listen...my feelings are hurt or whatever...send me a text..texts do go both ways you know.

 

funny thing is..my feelings aren't hurt in the least bit..despite the fact that you pretty much told me that my beliefs are offensive..rather, i took it in stride..it didn't rattle me or make me change how i feel about you or anyone else.  i plan to continue to pray for you and everyone or anyone else that has the same 'pessimistic' (your words not mine) beliefs as i always do.

 

this is an unfortunate set of circumstances which, frankly, i can't even begin to fathom your reasoning for 'venting' on such a public forum..but hey, i'll take your lead and put it out there too...

 

SMH...goes to show you...its not home training that some don't have..its immaturity..frankly, if you were mature and had home training, i bet your training would've taught you to go to the person who you felt wronged you and say just that..instead of 'venting' so others could 'back' you up..afterall, immaturity is the incapacity to use one's intelligence without the guidance of another....

 

enough said...

 

R~
 

 

R~

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Well you did judge, and it was highly offensive. I have 27 texts of you ranting and raving about how as a black woman you couldn't believe I lost my faith etc etc. It is what it is. This is a place to vent and be HONEST and I felt attacked and it was truly uncalled for. You continuously crave attention (like now) I've blocked you from FB and here but yet you still seem to find a way to offend and try to prove an ignorant point. Now I see why you were also blocked from this site for awhile and the nasty emails you sent to the admin that you also sent to me. You have a serious issue and I really feed bad for you making this vent all about you. I digress.

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cupcake,

 

YOU'RE RIGHT THIS IS A PLACE TO  VENT AND YES YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO FEEL THE WAY YOU FEEL BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND THE OTHER BRIDE'S POINT.

 

WHY PUT YOUR FEELINGS ON SUCH A PUBLIC FORUM...IS IT REALLY THAT SERIOUS?

 

I'VE VIEWED THE OTHER BRIDE'S PLANNING THREAD AND SEEN MANY OF HER POSTS..SHE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE AN INCONSIDERATE OR IGNORANT PERSON, OR EVEN AN OUTRAGEOUSLY RUDE INDIVIDUAL..RATHER YOUR POST SOUNDS INCREDIBLY COMBATIVE AND OFFENSIVE.

 

WHY NOT JUST TALK OFFLINE...I MEAN, IF SHE WAS REALLY A FRIEND DIDN'T YOU OWE HER THAT?  SOMETIMES WHEN YOU READ THINGS RATHER THAN SAY THINGS, IT CAN BE TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT..I JUST KNOW THAT IF IT WERE ME AND I THOUGHT SOMEONE WAS A FRIEND I WOULDN'T HAVE CHOSEN TO AIR OR VENT MY FRUSTRATIONS ONLINE.  ESPECIALLY WHEN I KNOW THAT PERSON IS ON THE SAME SITE.  HOW COULD SHE NOT BE OFFENDED OR FEEL LIKE SHE HAD TO PROTECT OR DEFEND HERSELF AND HER ACTIONS.  I MEAN, WHAT YOU'RE SAYING ABOUT SOMEONE'S FAITH, GIRL, THOSE ARE FIGHTING WORDS.  ISN'T THAT WHY WE WERE TAUGHT NOT TALK TO POLITICS OR RELIGION AND SOMETIMES SPORTS??? LOL!

 

IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE SHE'S BEING TRUE TO HERSELF AND YOU TO YOURSELF BUT ON THIS FORUM YOU LOOK LIKE SOMEONE WHO IS REALLY TAKING THIS ENTIRE SITUATION TO A WHOLE OTHER (IMMATURE) LEVEL.

 

I WONDER IF IN YOUR DIGRESSION, YOU MIGHT TAKE A HARD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF AND ASK THE QUESTION?  WHY DID I REALLY NEED TO VENT PUBLICLY INSTEAD OF TRYING TO RESOLVE THE ISSUE PRIVATELY...I MEAN, CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG??

 

I'M JUST SAYING!

 

 

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Oh, this isn't meant to be a fight. A vent isn't meant to be taken personally, but for me to express how I feel. Let out what's angering me and feel better. If someone was to basically say your non denominational ceremony was doomed, I would think you would be upset too.. (just an example)

this is a weird venue for a fight...

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Although I don't think this is a right place for public arguement, I don't see why Cupcake cannot vent on this site. She did not mention names or even profile nicks.  I come here to vent too.... knowing that one of these people may or may not be on this site.  sometimes we do look for opinions or comments from 'outside'. whether it's a stranger online or at a coffee shop just to see if we're overreacting or rightly so being peed off ....

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