I know people aren't made of money

[soontobemrsdow]

Just wondering....no scratch that....I'm positive there are some of you ladies out there that are getting the same thing I am and it was ok in the beginning but the more and more I hear it I want to blow up and explode!!!

 

I know it's expensive to come to a DW. Since day one we've said that and that if you can come great, if not we totally understand. Why do people still feel the need to tell us that:

 

$1600 is a lot of money you know.

In this economy how can you expect that of people.

I'm so excited to come even though it's a lot of money.

If only money grew on trees.

I feel like I can never catch up on my bills but I guess it's worth the money to be at your wedding.

 

omg I could list a million more money woes I've been hearing from people about how much it is. It's getting me so aggrivated I want to change the whole front page of my wedding website to huge bold letters: "I KNOW IT'S A LOT OF MONEY BUT PLEASE STOP REMINDING ME OF IT EVERYTIME I SEE YOU"

 

It is what it is and I know this conversation will never see its end but I don't even respond to it now. I go into robot mode as soon as someone starts it up. Just nod up and down and 'i know' and 'mhm' my way right through it lol

[Ravywedding]

Ayi-yi-yi! We are just at the beginning of this, and I was hoping it would get better before it got worse, but I guess we will see. You could always say something backhanded like: "I am glad that all things considered, we are important enough to have you join us for the wedding." Hope it doesn't sound snarky.

[TheFutureWagners]

Aww girl I know EXACTLY how you feel! My fiancé and I have had more tears since we started planning than our entire relationship- ALL because of people saying these things. Guess what people!? I DON'T CARE!!!

 

As I keep saying to my fiance- when I am completely, totally consumed by something- AKA MY OWN WEDDING, the last thing I need to hear are people being negative and giving me their opinions. Since when do people not even put on a good face and try to even PRETEND they are happy for you?? I would NEVER do what people are doing to us, the same thing that is happening to you. It is awful! Why can't people just say these things to other people and not to us??

 

I know EXACTLY how you feel, I have bawled my eyes out more times then I could count about this. I am a tough girl but this is just too much for me to take. People acting like idiots about this..

 

We will get through it, I promise. Just keep in mind that you are doing things YOUR way, no one else's. Take the attitude of "tough S*&t", they can spend the damn money. I've gotten there because of the people you are describing.

 

HANG IN THERE- You are not the only one getting this. Stay strong!!!

[MissSimone]

Exactly! I know once I actually let people know how much it costs to come some people will have smart snarky comments to say about the price. But honestly just keep it to yourself and don't come. Your not that important.

[*Meagan*]

People try to make everything about themselves.

 

That is when you should politely say "well good thing this isnt your wedding and you do not have to be there"

 

simply put. it may sound rude. but their comments are rude and unneccessary!

 

This happens to every DW bride... Im sure. Stick up for yourself. Dont just agree. No one is forcing anyone to go ON VACATION!!! lOl

[vlynnw]

Oh yes I get this all the time, and I've just stopped caring, I don't listen to it anymore, I say well I'm sorry you know you don't have to come if it's going to be a burden. I've just got sick of it and I've heard it since the day we got engaged. I literally broke the news to my family and the first things out of their mouths were...so do we still have to go somewhere for this (we had been saying we would have a DW), of course I said yes and the well that's a lot of money and blah blah has never ended. My own father told me I am burdening all of my guests by asking them to go to my wedding.

[ShawanaK]

I totally hear you!! My own Step Father said he couldn't come to my wedding because he is saving for retirement. The guy is 65 years old and has enough money!! I dont get it!! If he doesn't want to come for me at least he could come for my mom so she has someone to hang with, but no hes not coming!! Not Impressed!!

There are 6 kids in my family and I am the seventh, all my siblings are married and not one person in my family is coming besides my mom. I was very upset at first but I realize that this is OUR day and a DW was what I have always dreamed of, so if they dont want to join us Tough Shit (as the Future Wagners said).

We have 44 people joining us mostly friends and my FI family and no matter who comes or doesnt come, this is what we wanted and I know we will have a great time!!

[SDSteph]

Amen Girl! I know exactly what your going through. My mother gave me the guilt trip about people having to pay for thier own day passes if they dont stay at our resort! I am not made of money also! haha I want to put that on the website! Goodthing we are going the stress free DW route right? haha

[Mkandola]

Vent it out of you!!!

 

I am lucky to have an incredibly (surprisingly) supportive family of the destination wedding thing ... anyone who has made any comments I have been polite (but quick) to say "We are well aware that some people we are very close to wont be able to make it due to financial constrictions, but it is something we are willing to deal with"

[jenngene2011]

I can definately understand. I have been asked that since we decided on a destination wedding. But I just tell them that this is what I want and I don't care if people come or not and they should be lucky that they are getting an invite. I tell them all I am only inviting people I can actually stand to be around for three days or more and if they can't afford to come well to bad. I was working in the wedding industry for 6 years and have seen my share of home town weddings and that is not my thing. Spending 60k+ to have a wedding and invite everyone you have ever met because if you don't invite them and they find out you look bad than during the reception spending the next 5 hours going around talking to everyone that you invited is really not my cup of tea. I have actually been dealing with my FI's bestman's fiancee telling us that she might not come to the wedding because they are getting married two months after us and they might not have the money. I would totally understand if they were actually paying for everything but guess what they are not. All they had to pay for was a plane ticket thats it we were covering everything else. But now my FI wants us to cover everything for them. Which I'm not happy about as they new we were getting married in DR before they were even engaged. AHHH just needed to vent a little : )