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Babies...have them already or plan to ?


JODEY

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Just wanted to say how greatful I am to hear your veiws & cmmdee - your not the only peron that is scared, I had my neice round last night who is 5 yrs and she is truly a pain in the **** !!! but I think thats because shes let get away with a lot and totally rules the roost, anyway it dosn't put me off, I too have had mixed feelings but as I think about it more I' sure I will be ready when we're married, me and my DH will have had 10 wonderful, playful, years together without children, my DH is still getting the expensive car thing out the way now so another year or so should be fine.... we'll see.....

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I've actually been thinking about this subject a lot lately. Like when we are going to start trying to have kids. We've talked about having kids after we get married but never really discussed when we should start trying. Sadly, i kind of have to plan around my job. i have a three month busy season that i cannot take any time off from.

 

I guess fi and i really have to sit down and discuss when we want to start trying. I'm definately not going to tell anyone that we are trying, that's too much pressure.

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We've been married for just over a year now, and there were comments made as we were walking up the aisle after being pronounced man and wife.

 

I've always wanted kids, and always knew I'd have them, either naturally or through adoption if natural didn't work. But I also really wanted to have some time with just my husband. So we'll be trying in another year or so, but there are constant subtle hints from both mothers and other family members. Heck, even the card and craft stores place the baby products right next to the wedding products, so it's hard not to feel the pressure.

 

My husband actually put his hand on my belly the other night and asked, "when can I put a baby in there?". As cute as it was, it was also somewhat frightening to think of, in spite of how much I want kids.

 

We'll just have to wait and see what happens.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by DanielleNDerek View Post
I've actually been thinking about this subject a lot lately. Like when we are going to start trying to have kids. We've talked about having kids after we get married but never really discussed when we should start trying. Sadly, i kind of have to plan around my job. i have a three month busy season that i cannot take any time off from.

I guess fi and i really have to sit down and discuss when we want to start trying. I'm definately not going to tell anyone that we are trying, that's too much pressure.
I totally understand how you feel regarding work, fortunatly this is not the case for me but the "going back to work " thing is something I've also been thinking about, without sounding selfish my DH and I work hard and like nice things, the questons I keep asking myself are - How long would I want to take from work, months or yrs ?? Luckily DH is the bread winner but I do also earn a fair wage, maybe I would go back part time if I'm able to, I really don't know....
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Nice topic. I don't think that I will be telling people that I am trying becuase I can't handle the pressure plus they always say it happens when your not officially "trying" whatever that means. I guess something to do with stress and your body. FI and I love our life together here in NY but there definately those moments when we go visit friends and their little ones and have the kid talk. Having said that, we also acknowledge how hard it seems. I feel selfish still and just want it to be me and him. At the same time, I know that he is going to be a great daddy and can't wait to have that little one running around. Age is a factor for me too. sad.gif My acupuncturist reminded me of that the other day. I didn't even ask!

 

So I think we are leaving it up to fate. I just came off of my BCP after being on it for about 7 years we are using an alternate method. At my acupuncturist suggestion I just am trying to keep my body as "natural" as possible.

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Funny thing is my FI has been asking me to get pregnant for almost 2 years. I told him not until we get married. Once he proposed he has put the full core press on for me to get pregnant right away. I have pushed him off to not "try" until Feb (wedding in April). My guy is baby crazy....

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Originally Posted by JODEY View Post
Wow ! Only six weeks pregmant, congratulations ! Can I ask a personal question... You don't have to answer if you don't want - Were you on the pill a long time before you came off to get pregnant and how long was it before to got pregnant since you started trying ? I will have been on the pill 10 yrs when I come off after the wedding and I'm a little worried that its a long time .....
Don't worry about how long you have been on the pill. Its not like other medications that have to work their way out of your system. Once you're off your natural hormones should kick back into gear and start regulating everything.
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My FI has been the one wanting to try now. I keep telling him we have to wait til after the wedding. lol I'm kind of hoping he'll be ok to just let it happen when it happens. I wouldn't mind being married for a while and enjoying each other. I kind of feel a little selfish like some others have said- there are some things I still want to do before putting a child first in my life.smile02.gif

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I've been married for a little over 2 months but we have been together for 8 years. His family is DYING for us to have baby so they call me on Mothers day "just in case". sounds cute but its really annoying b/c they know that we have no intentions of having kids anytime in the foreseeable future. We are both starting our own businesses and have lots of other things going on but they just want a baby to play with and dress up! ARG, ok so i'm a lil frustrated.

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