Inviting "Plus Guest"

raisinblur · 02-21-2007, 10:17 PM

So I'm planning a Cabo wedding and I want to keep the guest list as small as I can to keep costs down. Do you gals know what's the proper etiquette for inviting single friends? Do I have to invite the friend "plus guest" or can I just invite the friend only? If a friend is married and I don't know the spouse that well, I would still feel obligated to invite both of them as a married couple (which is what I'm planning to do). Ditto for friends with long-time partners. But what about friends who are single or just casually dating someone?

On the one hand, I don't want to discriminate against my single friends, but on the other hand, I don't want the guest list to get too big.

What's the proper thing to do?

LALA · 02-21-2007, 10:51 PM

I had this issue too. I invited those with SO's or spouses and included both parties. Those just casually dating or single I invited alone.

Janet · 02-21-2007, 11:08 PM

Although I didn't formally write And Guest on anyone's invite, I let everyone know they were welcome to bring someone. I felt like if they were going to travel all the way to Mexico for me they should be welcomed to do whatever it took to make the vacation more fun for them. I personally would not have traveled alone to Cabo!

The funny thing is that there were enough single people that nobody brought a random boyfriend or girlfriend and it was just fine. I think it made people feel good that they were welcome to if they wanted so I got goodwill credit for that gesture, and ultimately I didn't have to shoulder any more cost.

If you were single and invited to a DW, would you want to go alone? Some people would and some people wouldn't I guess...

gkashmira · 02-22-2007, 01:13 AM

We are doing the same thing as Kate. I've had a few people ask if they could bring someone and I would always say yes if directly asked. However, i don't want to encourage it or have people think they need a date either.

I do have one single friend whoa ctually just told me upfront that she will not be going. she doesn't have anyone to go with and to be honest i can respect that. I would go without a SO if I had fother single riends going as well but in her case she ia a work friend and all our other work friends are in relqationships...

AnnR · 02-22-2007, 05:35 AM

same here i think - i put the SO's on the STD name if it was a serious enough relationship. if i knew someone might be dating i said "and guest" - there were a few i didn't put "and guest" but I let them know they could bring someone!

LEIGH · 02-22-2007, 06:07 AM

I ran into the same situation...I figured if they are going to pay to come all that way to see our wedding, then they could bring whoever they wanted! For some reason, I just can't really tell someone who annd who they can't pay for! I think it's just a personal preference.....But I can say that I know what you are talking about with $$$$ adding up!
Good Luck!

JPMO · 02-22-2007, 06:36 AM

I am pretty much n board with everyone else. I didn't write "and guest" but most people are bringing a guest. I initially included and guest numbers in my count.

TammyB · 02-22-2007, 06:49 AM

Yeah, we invited our single friends and a guest for them. IMO, I wouldn't want to be at a wedding with a bunch of couples and be the only single person there.

TA Jill · 02-22-2007, 07:49 AM

I put and guest on all of my invitations, unless of course the person was married or in a long relationship. I feel the same as some of the others, if someones going to travel to mexico they can bring whoever they want and I wouldn't want people to not want to come because they were going to have to travel by themselves and not have someone to hang out with when they were down there. We know a lot of people we invited won't come, so we're not really worried about it.

Nrvsbride · 02-22-2007, 07:55 AM

I plan to invite everyone with guests only b/c that is my single friends' biggest complaint that they never get invited with a date and then they go to these weddings alone and have no one to talk to. Can you imagine going all the way to cabo by yourself? And your all alone in your room, and then there are all these couples around being lovey dovey and your sitting and the pool by yourself. I would never do that to anyone. I'm just going to suck it up. I'm sure most guests don't end up coming anyway.

-Glenda