wedding dress vent!

[TA Jill]

First I'm going to apologize that this is so long!

So as most of you know I have tried on a LOT of dresses and finally chose 4 to show my mom & sister, we went on saturday. Well, let me just say that they weren't really any help at all, in fact, I think they made this worse.

I explained to them that I've already tried many dresses at many different places and these were some that I liked and could see myself wearing, I had two favorites, well then my mother decides to ask about the prices on the dresses and my favorite one is $1500, so when I told her that she wasn't very happy and proceeds to badger the poor sales girl about that price and how much alterations were going to be. And she didn't think the dress was right for a beach wedding either. I didn't think the dress was that formal, she didn't agree.

I think the most irritating part is that as far as I know, I'm paying for the dress, so what I want to spend on the dress is MY business, not hers. If she's going to pay for the dress then speak up and tell me that and I can look for something for less money, but if I'm paying for it, I'm going to get what I want!

So I left there very irritated and with no decisions made. Now I'm just second guessing the dresses I've tried and feel like I should just start over and see what else I find that I like, maybe try some simpler dresses.

I go back and forth it seems like every second of every day about how much I want to spend on a dress. I think about the fact that I'm going to wear this dress once, for a few hours, and yes I want to look beautiful, but will an expensive dress really make the difference for me, could I find a less expensive dress and still be extremely happy with how I look and feel.

Why am I so indecisive? Has anyone else had any similar problems, please tell me I'm not the only one!!!

Please help before I start and again and again

[EDYTA]

Jill - don't let others influence your decision....even though it's nice to get someone else input it comes down to what you want and how you feel in the dress

Maybe you should just go on and try on a few more dresses, there's no harm in that....if you love the one for $1500 than you will always end up coming back to it and that way you will know that it is your dress

so I say go do some browsing and trying on....good luck

[LEIGH]

Oh Jill!
I'm so sorry that you are going through this...... I promise, if I were in the same state, we could go dress shopping together!!!! I'm having the same sort of issues...especially with family involved....I decided to not include any family with any of my planning, afterall...it is our wedding and WE are paying for it!!!!! I'm basically going to do what I want to do, and don't have time for any negative feedback about the way that I picture our special day!
Why don't you go and take some more time trying on dresses by yourself, and have the ladies there or your daughter take some pictures of you in the dresses that are your favorites....then that way, you could post them and we can help make you decision.....Just an idea.....But don't let these people get you down, it just isn't worth it!!!! Get the dress that you want and have already set your budget for!
Let me know if I can help...... to you!

[TA Jill]

Thanks girls!

I think I am going to try to go look again sometime this week and try some different styles.

I really didn't want to get my family involved because I knew this would happen, but they really wanted to come and I know they mean well, but I really just want to make a decision and order my dress.

I will try to take pictures if I can, the place I went this weekend wouldn't let me, but maybe I'll go to davids bridal again and try some different ones.

[SASSYGIRL]

Originally Posted by jilly76

Thanks girls!

I think I am going to try to go look again sometime this week and try some different styles.

I really didn't want to get my family involved because I knew this would happen, but they really wanted to come and I know they mean well, but I really just want to make a decision and order my dress.

I will try to take pictures if I can, the place I went this weekend wouldn't let me, but maybe I'll go to davids bridal again and try some different ones.

Davids bridal should let you take pictures - I would have had the same issue you had is I got my family involved - the girls on here picked my dress for me and it was a lot less stress and i still got some great feedback....I would highly recommend it!

[Christine]

Jilly, I am so sorry they were no help, I found shopping with my mom a little frustrating too, since her dress cost less than $100 in 1977 she felt like mine should also cost that much. I finally found that shopping with a friend was better. If I was closer I would go shopping with you.
Go back to DB and see if you can find something similar, to the one you love for less and maybe you will feel better overall.

[AnnR]

Jill - I'll be in Boston this week (Malden/Revere, actually) - I think you said we weren't close, but if you need a dress shopping companion, and we're not that far apart - let me know! I could look at veils too.

[RAENJAY]

Sorry to hear that the family wasn't much help. I say you should go one more time, but in the end you have to love your dress - not everybody else. You should get the one that makes you feel most special.

[TA Jill]

Thank you everyone for your advice I really appreciate it!!

Sarah, you were so smart to not get your family involved. I would have liked to have gone that route, but they kept asking me when we were going to go look so I kind of felt obligated. But I think I'm going to go back to davids and maybe have the girl there take some pictures for me.

Christine, I think you're right, maybe if I go back to DB I can find something else, and I still have the lace one at DB that I really liked so I'll try that one again too. I wish you were closer!

Ann, thank you so much for the offer!! If I was closer to Boston I'd totally take you up on that offer, but I'm about 1 1/2 hours away, so thats tough to do during the week with everything else thats going on, but I appreciate your help!!

Stephanie, you hit the nail right on the head, I have to pick the dress I will be happiest with!

Thanks for letting me vent!

[Christine]

That's what we are here for. Take lots of pics and we will do what we did with sarah (sassygirl)