I am a bad bride

[andreslove]

Wow. Talk about perfect timing. I'm in the same boat. My shower is also next Saturday and I didn't register either. I've been living on my own, so it wasn't like I need house things or anything. If someone asks I'll tell them stores that I like (Victoria Secret, Target, etc.). I actually hate showers though. They all seem the same to me (girls, gifts, games). So, my sister is having a mobile spa to come to the shower to spice things up (all of the workers are men so it's like a pampering session). Anyway, I hope everything turns out ok. I'm dreading opening the gifts with everyone looking at my expressions. I have a hard time hiding them.

[TA Jill]

I'm going to register, only so I can give people guidance. we really don't need a lot, we already live together. We just feel bad, we don't want people that are spending money to come to the wedding to feel like they have to get us anything, we know they're spending lot to come to mexico.

[EDYTA]

You are no where near to being a bad bride, it gets so overwhelming trying to focus on a shower when u have ur wedding just a month away...i agree with the other girls and totally think that people just don't want to put in the time to finding a great gift so their getting upset that u wont do a registry....or just tell everyone that u dont need anything or ask for gift certificates for places like potery barn or victoria's secret...just a thought

[Jessalyn]

You're a great Bride!! A thoughtful and kind bride!

As you said in your last post, I'd just repeat to your MOH....sexy lingerie!!

I'm fearing the same situation as my shower approaches....I can already see it....but like you, I'm going to say "If you insist on getting me a gift, lingerie please!"

Let us know how your shower turns out!!

[TA Jill]

oops, BTW christa, you're not a bad bride!!! (forgot to post that in my post before, that's the whole point of this thread, duh!)

[weez]

Oh my! It sounds like you hit on something here! Lol! I am going through the exact same thing, a friend has been sweet enough to want to have a shower for me but I didn't register anywhere nor do I want to. I didn't want people to have to buy us gifts after they spent so much money travelling to our wedding! I feel the exact same way that you do! So, no you are not a bad bride, I think the other girls came up with some great suggestions and I think I will tell everyone who asks what my fav stores are! So thanks for posting a very helpful thread!

[Jackie]

Originally Posted by A10CALGAL

Oh, yeah didn't mean I didn't want to go to the shower, I guess I mis-typed. I just want people to be there & have fun, I could really care less about the gift thing. Like I said, if its something you think I should have or want me to have, then great! I just hate telling people what they should get me...and the reality is that at 31 there isn't a whole lot that I "need" other than an affordable home to buy!

Christa I totally agree! your not a bad bride at all. People just might be so used to these traditional showers that they are now confused as to what yours is all about. Hopefully your MOH, can keep the guests at bay and spread the word that it is more of a fun exscuse to get together and celebrate, rather than a stiff gift giving sit down guu and gah over each present while your MOH sits their and rights everything down. After all the bridal showers I have had to attend I would be jumping up and down in excitement to be invited to yours!

[KARLA]

Christa,

I'm going to go against most of the people here.... Yet, I definitely do not think you are a bad bride!!

I'm such an advocate for registering, regardless of wanting gifts or not. I really think that most people do not understand non-traditional weddings. We decided to register after my hubby's parents decided to throw us an AHR. After both of us living on our own and having our own houses, and then combining both, we barely have room for any extra stuff. We knew that the AHR guests would give us gifts, and we would rather have those gifts be things we need/want than random gifts. Some of the guests did not give us things off our registry. It was still very thoughtful and truthfully sometimes some very nice gifts, yet since they don't know our taste, it typically did not match our decor, etc... We seriously still have no clue what to do about some of those gifts.

Why not do a very short registry at someplace that has very flexible return policies, like Bed Bath and Beyond? That way you can always get cash, if you decide to return your gifts.

We are still getting questions from some of our friends that attended our wedding in Cabo regarding what we want for gifts, etc... We keep telling them to not get us anything, that attending the wedding was more than enough, yet they insist on getting us something. Seriously, I really think that it is just engrained in the mind of a guest that they MUST send you a gift. Why not avoid the hassle of the questioning?!?

[MagsieMexico]

I'm so with you! And you are not a bad bride at all... I just felt that a) I have lived on my own for a long time so I don't really need stuff, b) showers are weird and I don't like them, c) everyone has to spend so much to come to our wedding that i don't wnat them to buy gifts either...

But, my MIL to be, has been giving me a hard time about the shower.
And I was told by someone else that it was *selfish* of me to not register!!! How ridiculous... something about me thinking I'm too good for people's gifts!!! I couldn't believe it. So, I don't know what to do now...

[anacgarcia]

If I were you I'd preffer to register than to get stuff I don't like or need.. people are going to get you gifts anyway.. but it's totally your choice and it doesn't make you a bad bride.. it's just my opinion..