Engagement party invitation question

atlcatlover · 07-26-2008, 08:26 PM

We are having a small wedding with family and close friends only in Las Vegas next year, probably only about 50 people. (I realize that is not small to lots of folks on this board :) )

I have told my friends that I really dont want a shower but am ok with an engagement party since you dont have to bring a gift to that. I know some people might bring gifts, but it's not a given that they will.

Is it ok to invite folks to the engagement party who wont be invited to the wedding? I think generally the answer would be no, but everyone knows we are having a small wedding, and since it's a party more than a shower I am wondering if that rule still holds.

Anna83 · 07-27-2008, 05:59 PM

Are you having an AOR? If you are, then I think you can invite people to the party that are not invited to the wedding as long as they are invited to the AOR. If you are not having an AOR, I think it would be more appropriate to invite only people who are invited to the wedding.

bridetobe22 · 07-28-2008, 01:17 PM

We are in a similar situation in that we are getting married in Mexico with about only 40 people. We wanted our Engagement Party to be our at home party and invited everyone we would have invited to the wedding had we not had it in Mexico. Everyone was so happy to come. I totally think it is ok to invite more people to the Engagement Party if you are having a destination wedding with a limited amount of guests. Good luck!

Kits55 · 07-28-2008, 01:22 PM

atlcatlover (i myself am a cat lover too, lol :) ):

i think that if you are NOT having an at home reception after the wedding then yes, invite anyone and everyone to help you celebrate your engagement party. just let people know that you're having a small, intimate wedding in Las Vegas next year and that you may or may not (depending on what you're doing) have a reception at home afterward and that's why you're inviting them to your party. Most people aren't offended at all when you explain your situation to them.

JoLo908 · 07-28-2008, 03:42 PM

I am sure if people know it is only close family/friends, then they will be delighted to come to the engagement party. I think with destination weddings in general you have to make some choices or moves that you wouldn't normally make at home... I have to keep reminding myself as well. One of my guests told me that the most important thing is that people want to share the celebration of you getting married, and having them at your at home engagement party is a great way to do that!

atlcatlover · 07-29-2008, 07:00 AM

Thanks. This has been the most difficult decision!

We want to have an AHR, but a lot of that will depend on whether or not we have gotten settled into a new house. We are planning to sell both our houses and buy a new one, and I've always envisioned our AHR to be in our new house.

Everyone knows that we dont want some huge formal affair which is the biggest reason we aren't getting married at home, and they completely understand.